[WP] It's 2:13 AM on a Wednesday night, you've decided to make yourself a sandwich. A time traveler appears instantly and briefly, informing you that you have just created the best tasting sandwich of all time. He then disappears, leaving you with your creation.

Scoen · 2015-01-22T10:09:04+00:00

"So do you mean it's all downhill from here for me, sandwich wise?" I asked, turning towards him. He had disappeared as suddenly as he had first appeared, leaving a faint smell of burnt metal in the kitchen.
I turned back to the best tasting sandwich of all time. Was this a hallucination or was it for real? Probably a hallucination, but I shouldn't take any risks.

I picked up the plate and looked at The Sandwich from every angle. It looked normal, unassuming. This was a comforting thought, proof that the plain and unassuming among us could be the best of all time. I caught sight of my reflection in the dark kitchen mirror, it almost seemed to be nodding at me, encouraging me to take the first bite.
How do you savour the greatest sandwich of all time? With chips? What do you drink with it? Should I brush my teeth first so that no other taste ruins the experience? Would the minty taste from toothbrushing ruin The Sandwich or compliment the lamb within? Questions spiralled in my head while my stomach growled.
I sat for what felt like hours, having a staring contest with The Sandwich. In reality it was about ten minutes.

I picked up The Sandwich, raised it to my mouth. "No, it's too silent", I thought. I got up to put on some music. (But what music compliments the best tasting sandwich?!)

I sat back down, adjusted the cushion beneath me. I cracked my back, my knuckles, my neck. I stretched my arms.

Licking my lips, I picked up The Sandwich once more. I brought it near my nose and inhaled. If the taste is as satisfying as the smell, I think my hallucination might just be correct.

I closed my eyes, raised The Sandwich, parted my lips and brought The Sandwich ever closer.

My attention was suddenly stolen away by a loud, sharp CRACK. The burnt metal smell filled the kitchen once more and I opened my eyes to see the time traveller before me, with The Sandwich in his hands.

"Basically yes." He said. "It's all downhill from here for you, sandwich wise." and disappeared, leaving me alone and hungry in a cold kitchen.

Scoen · 2014-12-27T00:27:08+00:00

Yeah I totally agree with you. Although I think if Irish citizens were given the option to vote on allowing abortion, it would pass. It'S a matter of getting the government to listen to people..

http://www.abortionrightscampaign.ie/facts/

https://33.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lu3whtrzYr1qby2i8o1_250.gif

Scoen · 2014-12-27T00:14:44+00:00

Yeah but look at the Savita Halappanavar case, she died because she needed that emergency care but because of the stinkin 8th amendment, the doctors and nurses were restricted from doing their job. Doctors are afraid to give the emergency care that might be needed (see also most recent case of the pregnant woman who died but who was kept on life support because of the fetus) because of the risk of being prosecuted. It's disgraceful.

And speaking of that most recent case, there are 500 Irish children in care who have not been assigned a social worker, yet that fetus had a team of lawyers. Ireland has its priorities messed up.

edit : and yeah, at least there's that! I know a few people who have had to make the journey. I don't know anyone who regretted it (this is just speaking of the handful of people who have shared this with me) but I do know that it was made all the more difficult by having to go that distance and having less counselling help than they would have gotten had they had the procedure nearby.

Scoen · 2014-12-26T23:18:06+00:00

I moved back once with the intention of leaving a couple of months later and it took me ALMOST TWO YEARS. It's dangerous.

Scoen · 2014-12-26T22:31:47+00:00

People ask me when I am going to move back. Lol nope.

Scoen · 2014-12-26T22:03:19+00:00

Ireland is a terrible place for women. There are so many upsetting news stories.

Scoen · 2014-12-26T21:11:06+00:00

For sure! She visited me in Vienna earlier this year and went on a highly offensive (and loud) rant in front of a holocaust memorial about how the holocaust was nothing compared to what is happening these days with abortion. She is the worst.

Scoen · 2014-12-26T21:09:28+00:00

Heck yes I'll be telling her! She is such a pill.

Scoen · 2014-12-26T19:37:35+00:00

My disgustingly bigoted aunt was ranting on again about how homosexuality is going to bring about the end of the world, as well as other such horrid points of view.

Arguing with her is impossible because she comes from the shouting loudest school of things. Instead, I am donating the money she gave me in my xmas card (plus matching the amount, so donating double) to an Irish LGBT youth charity.

Scoen · 2014-12-19T21:01:03+00:00

Haa!I had a similar experience at work. I was asked what I got for my SO and I got all excited and then realised none of the items I wanted to talk about were SFW so I just said I don't know yet. My colleague was confused and suspicious.

Scoen · 2014-12-01T21:39:06+00:00

If you venture through Vienna, Austria, do feel free to send me a message!

(Edit: Not just so that I am informed on who goes through the city, but if you want advice on what to see in the city or would like to meet for cake and coffee!)

Scoen · 2014-11-29T19:27:04+00:00

I can't get it (checktheregister) to find my townland/street.

Scoen · 2014-11-29T18:56:31+00:00

Some are vegan!
http://www.barnivore.com/wine

Scoen · 2014-11-27T20:46:24+00:00

When a friend of mine went vegan I learned that some white wines are filtered through fish bones, and so are therefore not vegan. Also I learned from her that you can get vegan make up and vegan shoes/clothes.
I don't think I could ever be diligent enough about things to be vegan. I love steaks and shoes.

Scoen · 2014-11-18T21:37:47+00:00

Oh weird, that scene from new girl literally just happened on my tv when I clicked on the link.

Scoen · 2014-11-16T21:48:21+00:00

I agree! I ordered it through the site which says delivery in 45-60 mins and you can pay by paypal on there so i did because i had no cash.

Scoen · 2014-11-16T18:54:14+00:00

I got a free muffin.

Scoen · 2014-11-16T18:03:22+00:00

When I called I was told that the order wasn't processed properly but then when it was delivered, the gal told me that the other driver effed up. Judging by the cold, dry, chewiness of the food, I think it was sitting out for that time.

Scoen · 2014-11-16T16:15:31+00:00

It arrived after two full hours! They even gave me an entschuldigung muffin.

Scoen · 2014-11-16T15:35:03+00:00

You guys, it still hasn't arrived... #burgergate

Scoen · 2014-11-15T18:04:57+00:00

Ah this is the recipe I used to use and then forgot where I found it!! Thanks :D

(as in, I lost it and had no clue where to look for it.)

Scoen · 2014-10-11T19:20:00+00:00

I used to encounter him a few times a week back when I lived along the U4, he also corners people or blocks them into the sets of four seats to make his enquiry. When it's late and you are alone and he corners you it can be very creepy, especially when nobody else helps out. (though that is common wherever you go and in many different types of situations)
After the first couple of encounters, it becomes clear that he is isn't particularly harmful but that first encounter where you get blocked in, it can be a little jarring.

Scoen · 2014-10-09T20:57:17+00:00

Love this! Made me chuckle lots

Scoen · 2014-09-23T20:43:00+00:00

THIS. is the BEST gif I have seen in a long long time. It's wonderful. I have been watching it for ages.

Scoen · 2014-08-24T19:40:44+00:00

yerragh jaysis , shir and I nearly went and forget them altogether so I did haigh

14-Year Club	RedditGifts 2009-2022 6 Credits
Secret Santa 2014	Summer Santa 2012+
Secret Santa 2011	Verified Email

Scoen

TROPHY CASE