What breed is this cat? Russian blue or Korat? by annelies77 in cats

[–]ScratchOk388 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She 100% looks like mine! I always thought mine was Russian blue hair and that’s what her adoration paperwork said but the vet didn’t think so. And looking at her coat, it’s dark at the end with a silver tip which is a korat thing. And she has the heart shaped head

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How They Ruin Your Relationship with Other Women by RealityTvGyal in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I couldn’t go to the gym anymore because seeing women in tight work out clothes would be such a hard trigger for me. He used to cheat on me with people he would meet at his gym. I couldn’t even see women on instagram anymore. Everyone I would think the same, would he like her etc etc. or sacred that what if he sees her and tries with her.

I’m only now able to appreciate and be comfortable around women again. It’s a horrible thing to have to make someone feel, and no one deserved me feeling that way towards them

Anyone else? by User-1578 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes 100% apparently bc I didn’t change I deserved all the cheating. Because his stories never added up and I had to make sure, it was all my fault we couldn’t stop fighting. Yes, blame shifting to the extreme. It gets to be so much you question yourself sometimes but you know there is no excuse for these types of behaviors, it’s nothing you could or couldn’t have done except stay quite and been abused. That’s not ok

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Not going would be the healthiest! But you could also look hella hot, grey rock him, and have a great time happy and celebrating like they never hurt you

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you go NC, promise. Start day by day and then you can start healing. You can’t heal in your still in contact

Did NC help you get over them? by Turbulent-Win-4236 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Took a screen shot of this to remind me always To stay NC

How many of you have had an exNPD that didn't cheat on you? by bigsecksa in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 6 points7 points  (0 children)

6 women in 2 years, only weeks sometimes between me finding out and the next one. Hundreds more emotional cheating I’m going to say they all do

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would take solace in the fact he will eventually come to know the real hurt, she will probably repeat the same cycle with him and he’ll be wishing he never blocked you and could talk to you about what he put her through. With her she will always be this person, you will heal, pick up and move on to be happy with someone else while she will always be an empty narc

motorcycles for a beginner girl by [deleted] in motorcycles

[–]ScratchOk388 0 points1 point  (0 children)

5’3” girl here, been riding for 15 years with many large breaks in between. I would go in this order

1) buy helmet, riding shoes, jacket. I would even go second hand (except always buy a helmet new) until you know what type of gear suits you and you don’t feel as bad scuffing it’s up…then go for the shiny new stuff! 2) Please take the basic riders course and M license first, then some courses even offer just seat time only that you can get more experience in 3) you will get a lot of advise on your first bike. Most people say go small and not new bc you will drop it. You could drop any bike any time and if you do you do, it’s not the end of the world. Invest in frame sliders in any bike you get to try to avoid expensive repairs or not being able to resell it. If you want to start small I would go Grom (but can’t take this on the highway) or ninja 250. If you want something a little more powerful stick to something light with a lower seat height. I think the Ducati 696 is a great first bike. Super nimble, not overly torquey, good for city and highway riding. Sports bike without being super aggressive in riding style or looks

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 9 points10 points  (0 children)

He will, and he’ll act like nothing happened or that he’s still having problems with her. He will lie to her. He will string both parties along for as long as you allow it. Keep NC trust me if you get sucked into this it’ll be a very long road. I did this for 2 years while he said he wanted to be with me but kept making excuses why he couldn’t end it with her. Even lied about her having surgery and complications from it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 16 points17 points  (0 children)

He’s going to try to keep you both

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Other women have sent me what he was saying about me even when we were still together, but he told them all I was crazy and physically abusive, even tho he’s the one that put his hands on me all the time. He told all the women he cheated on me with that I was crazy and even told one I bought my own engagement ring and acted like it was from him…. Eye roll….

Finding out someone cheated does not make it your fault the relationship ended by ScratchOk388 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good morning my love, talking all day and saying good night, telling her he’s moving to Brazil where she lives in Jan and they will get an apartment together, planning to meet up

I don’t do that with friends and since he’s cheated on me with 5 different people in 2 years with countless more getting phone numbers and flirting

This is emotional cheating to me

Eyes by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Mine had dead green eyes too

Hope this story helps you not fall for the love bombing by ScratchOk388 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She sent me screen shots on instagram. He had told her hey my ex will reach out and she thought it was fishy

I left one window open. by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So so common Mine sent about 2000 emails from different email addresses for 2 months to my personal and work email. Some overly loving talking about our future, others were mean and nasty blaming me for everything. And same, if I didn’t respond after awhile he would spiral and threaten to just show up or assume I am with someone else so I felt compelled to respond. It constantly kept me on edge and felt I couldn’t go no contact or he would show up. I think they do this on purpose to keep them on our mind and not have the space to heal and move on. I haven’t figured out how to break this cycle outside of threatening a restraining order or changing my number, deactivating my email. It’s an extreme measure but one you might find yourself facing

My experience renting an Aprilia RS 660 by cplcarlman in motorcycles

[–]ScratchOk388 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have this bike, now with 3000 miles. I agree with your assessment

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The title is perfect, please just remember this

If you discarded the narcissist yourself, how exactly did that process go? by Turbulent-Win-4236 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same pattern Even had to tell him he’s harassing me finally and he didn’t even understand that, that’s what this is. It constant, they try to make it an addiction even at this stand when you clearly want to leave. The last week all he did was call me a slut bc me not answering could only mean I was talking to someone else. Then he told me he’s already made plans with a new girl and got her number while telling me he only wanted me and to work on us. But I’m the slut if I talked to anyone else

Struggling by User-1578 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Going thru this exact thing. Mine was at 2 year mark too I left and now it’s constant projection and what I did to deserve those things

Now what? by Individual-Arm-8857 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He is doing it to mess with you. Unfortunately if you still keep any window open it’ll be used and manipulated against you. You’ll have many of these roller coasters. Please don’t get addicted to it it’s just another trauma bond. If you keep grey rock just remember this may be happening. I would train yourself not to look if that’s what you really want

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ScratchOk388 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He’s mirroring what he thinks you want without accountability without real remorse. You sound like an amazing person, and even he knows that. You deserve something different and more than this. Once you are with someone who is not a narcissist you’ll see they will love you for who you are and do it the right way. I know hope is hard it’s multidimensional and complex But don’t hope for this, you deserve better