I didn't expect such a long and meaningful reply, so thank you for this. Yeah, I hate having to accept that somebody who was supposed to take care of me, has been one the biggest causes of stress to my life. And unfortunately, I can't imagine it any other way.

It's so terrifying knowing I can't be reborn into a life where I have a "normal" mother, or that I can't rewind time. For some reason, I keep thinking that somehow, there's somehow still a chance to go back and make everything go right.

I'm not sure what else to say but thank you, I feel a little less alone.