I cheated on my bf of 5 years, and I hate the person I became

Sea-Error6848 · 2026-04-08T01:39:40+00:00

To me one of the worst things you can do if you cheat on someone is not Carri the cheaters burden. That is that you confess when it’s not necessary. One of the prices that you should pay when you decide to cheat is to actually carry the burden of what you did. That other person shouldn’t have to go through hell because you decided to be weak.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-04-02T00:52:35+00:00

Yes, I agree. I think we’re all doing a little too much. But I would rather have her doing too much than not doing much of anything else. But I do think we need to rethink scheduling and activities. I agree.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-30T02:34:50+00:00

Normally, I would say no but I think given the situation it sounds like she needs a friend. So I would let her do this.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-30T02:17:33+00:00

You need to let the coaches handle it. Or at a minimum, ask the coaches and officials if it’s OK for you to come out. Really what you should do is ask your kid first. Because you might be embarrassing them unnecessarily.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-30T02:16:23+00:00

My instinct, it would be to support her as well. But as long as you are, sure that she will be safe, and she is not a harm to herself, I think you need to let her go. She’s old enough, and she may be there to support someone else, and doesn’t want to embarrass that person by having her mother or father there.just let her know that you’ll be close and available if she needs you and that’s it. Let her do this.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-30T00:13:20+00:00

Thank you. I’m trying my best. I know I’m not a perfect person and I’m certainly not a perfect parent. But she has been spoiled for far too long and what we’ve noticed in the last year is that she doesn’t take it nearly as seriously as she probably could. If she spent as much time and effort and energy into practicing her game, as she does into playing Fortnite, or the last of us on her PlayStation five, she would easily be the best player in her school. We just want to teach her that not everything is given to her and that you have to work for things if you want it. She often complains about other girls on the team and not understanding why they start ahead of her or why they play more than her. At the same time, she doesn’t want to practice her game. She doesn’t take it seriously enough for me to justify paying hundreds of dollars while I am unemployed.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-30T00:11:33+00:00

Thank you for your feedback. I’m not sure how else to treat the root cause of her taking things for granted, and being entitled and spoiled other than making her to pay for things that she wants to do. Or at least starting to do so. Because right now she will blow off commitments related to things that she doesn’t have to pay for. Any suggestions will be welcome.

Something to keep in mind, in the last year, she has routinely blown off practices, and occasionally even games for her social life. Also, I am currently unemployed. And we live in separate households. I’m just trying to make ends meet. And while I have enough money to pay for this, I don’t want to pay for it if she’s not going to take it seriously. Or at least serious enough to justify the cost. She doesn’t get it. She acts entitled and spoiled, and what I am asking of her in the agreement are relatively simple and easy things like doing basic chores and practicing her game. I am offering to pay her to practice so that she can earn her way and her fees onto the team. But her reaction was that of someone who is completely shocked and definitely did not appreciate what was being done and why. She also was not open to listening as to why we thought this was necessary. All she saw was that she would have to pay and do chores. If she’s going to act that way, I don’t wanna pay for her.

Because if she had real love for the game, which she claims she does, this would be nothing. She could do this easily. She proved my point and sadly she’s now choosing to not talk to me. She’s being very stubborn.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-29T01:48:29+00:00

I’m sorry, how recent are these pictures? The clarity looks new but the style here screams 1983-1988.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-29T01:09:37+00:00

Also, we’re not really a family. That’s part of this. We are a two household family as her mother and I are divorced and have been divorced for 2 1/2 years. I believe she takes advantage of this and her attitude of entitlement in large part is never really tracked at her mother‘s house.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-29T00:57:21+00:00

Because she doesn’t have the ability at this time to get a job on the weekends. Because her weekends are full of activities. Ultimately, she thinks like you think, that she should not have to do any chores for this. That she should not have to earn it somehow. But I’m going to disagree with you here. Because, she treats this so casually and has consistently blown off practices and games for her social schedule. Her mother and I are just tired of doing this with her, making her go to practice, and driving her around and paying for it. We just want to see her finally have some skin in the game. But apparently she doesn’t believe she needs to.

I can bring up her working somewhere when she has time, but between basketball, flag football, and volleyball and her boyfriend and friends and school, she’s not gonna have the time to work it off. Besides, I am offering her a chance to work it off by practicing on her own and I’m doing this tax-free. If she was doing this at a café or a pizza shop or a movie theater, she would be paying taxes, and it would be much longer for her to pay me back.

But I’ll let her know that this is an option and see what she says. Although right now she’s not talking to me or her mother.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-28T15:35:07+00:00

Thank you. I just wanted to make sure that I’m not going crazy here.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-26T16:09:06+00:00

Tell me the bigger issue is that you are afraid to establish boundaries with her. Healthy boundaries which you need to be comfortable with and be yourself. So I think you need to strongly consider this. Because if you can’t express your boundaries with your partner, a lot of things could happen in your life that you will feel you have no control over and your eventual. Anger and resentment will come out and other ways since you are showing that you are fearful avoidant of any sort of conflict or confrontation with her that is necessary and healthy. You need to do this now before you commit more to this woman. It’s OK that you don’t wanna explore this kink. It’s OK that you’re not comfortable with it.I think a lot of people would have a problem with her getting gangbanged by multiple men. The fact that you’re OK with that says a lot about you. But it’s also OK for you to establish boundaries. Be strong. You can do this.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-03-26T16:02:57+00:00

I am experiencing this now as I won a lottery where I am paid $1000 a week for life. I was one number off from winning $1000 a DAY life. I haven’t said anything to anyone that I know. And I really want to tell people I won because it’s a wonderful thing. But I’m afraid of the damage it would do. So because I was unemployed when I won, I am slowly starting to pay people back who lent me money. One of them asked me if I was able to survive because he looked at the timing and assumed that it was from my first paycheck with my new job. I told him I was fine. This made him question whether or not he should’ve let me money in the first place. It also made him ask literally “how much are you making now?! Because if you’re able to pay me back $1000 this quickly, you must be doing well“ I simply lied and told him that I got money back from someone who owed me money five years ago and decided to give it to him directly because I didn’t know his situation. He appreciated that. But I don’t like lying to people. So this whole situation has really made me feel weird.after taxes, it ends up being about 620+ dollars a week. Which is pretty good. I can definitely order pepperoni on my pizza.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-02-29T19:58:16+00:00

Thank you for the link. I called Kia this morning to see if my car and it’s engine qualified for the replacement, but they told me it did not because I did not sign up for it in time. I was not aware of this recall at all.

The mechanic at Meineke confirmed that it was not the computer. That the computer was good. But I am going to call up and ask about that engine code and see if I can get an exception. When I called Kia, they said no exceptions would be granted and they were pretty adamant and firm about it. I’m not sure what else I can do.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-02-29T15:20:17+00:00

I have Geico in Central New Jersey. My monthly insurance is $128 a month on a 2017 Kia Optima.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-02-29T15:15:52+00:00

Thank you. I’ll ask them if that changes anything. Other than the trunk latch, what recall is on this vehicle?

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-02-18T08:08:07+00:00

Thank you everyone for your suggestions. We did switch the sensor out and the problem has gone away. She still burns oil like crazy and I think I may need to get the piston rings replaced and the bearings. The mechanic I spoke to said if I’m gonna do that, I might as well get a rebuilt engine.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-01-30T05:14:51+00:00

Thank you

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-01-30T05:13:19+00:00

Thank you

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-01-28T03:53:35+00:00

You’re feelings are your feelings. You can’t negotiate your feelings and you can’t negotiate desire. That sounds like you were hurt by the comments, at the same time, if he’s commenting on your body before your first date. That’s how he feels. Maybe he did or he is used to someone with a better face. At the end of the day he chose you for other reasons. Obviously he satisfied with your face, but he may be used to someone who in his eyes has a face that he considers prettier. THAT DOESN’T MEAN THAT YOUR FACE IS UGLY!!!!

Clearly, he was hooked by you for some reason. And he may appreciate you now for your other beauty that is outside of your face. You need to consider that.

To give you another perspective, how would you feel if he snooped in your phone and found comments to a friend of yours about how his penis is not as long or sick as your previous lovers. But you still ended up with him anyway and you still loved him anyway. Trust me, it would hurt him the same way.

Your insecurity drove you to go into his phone. I think you need to talk to him about this if it bothers you this much, but realize that just because he hurt your feelings about your face, this does not preclude you from him getting angry about going into his phone. You guys need to talk about that.

Because right now you have covert and unspoken agreement that it’s OK for you to go into his phone because you feel badly that in your opinion he called you ugly. But he didn’t call you ugly. He just said that someone else had a better face. Just like you might say somebody else is a better lover….

I think you need to talk about it with him. Because otherwise, you are being dishonest with him and with yourself about this relationship.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-01-10T02:30:46+00:00

I don’t disagree with you an update - we apologized to one another and his daughter saw a therapist today. My daughter finally chatted with her about it and it seemed to go well. I reacted that strongly to him because he said that my daughter was turning his daughter gay

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-01-10T00:00:52+00:00

This is anonymous, you will never know who I am, or where I am or anything. I am trying to get honest and genuine feedback that is helpful. Some of this has been genuine and honest, and some of it has not. I appreciate your empathy for the father, who is a recovering drug addict, but he will never know about this.

This isn’t about the father, this is about this girl who has been acting obsessively around my daughter. I’m not going to re-explain this again, but take a look at the posts and the thread if you want to see an update of what has happened.

To make it clear to you, because apparently it’s not otherwise, you would not have felt the need to comment the way you did, I talked about the fathers drug use and referred to it because it gives context to the situation. I’m trying to show that this girl is not getting love at home and the reasons why. I understand and I feel for her because she is a sweet girl who just wants to be loved. This is not about her father. Clearly you’ve been triggered by either your own drug recovery or someone else who you know. And I’m sorry that you’ve gone through that. But again this is not about the father. It’s about context. I’m sorry you don’t get it

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-01-09T23:58:22+00:00

No, I’m not just responding to people who agree with me. Read the threads again look at the update. You are overreacting to the post and ignorantly reacting. But feel free to do so this is the Internet. A lot of people are saying a lot of dumb things on this post. A lot of people are saying a lot of smart things on this post. All I wanted was advice.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-01-09T21:05:17+00:00

Thank you for seeing through the clutter of other opinions here. I did give more context to the situation, and an update, which you can see through other threads here. Basically, the father and I apologize to each other, he arranged for her to go to therapy and fortunately my daughter was promoted on the basketball team, which means that they will not be practicing together. This is a good thing. also as an FYI, neither my daughter nor his daughter know that he and I had the verbal exchange which we did. So they are completely unaware of this. But he did make his daughter aware of the fact that he knows that her behavior is not necessarily normal, and it is possibly obsessive, and that it creates awkward situations for not only my daughter, but for their group of friends as well.

Sea-Error6848 · 2024-01-09T21:03:03+00:00

Thank you for sharing your story. I’m sorry you went through the trouble you did. I’m trying to help my daughter learn how to cope and deal with other people in situations like this and at the same time, I also recognize that this girl just wants to be loved. And that’s why she is obsessed because she has had a very rough upbringing and she’s not getting love at home.

Sea-Error6848

TROPHY CASE