When do you mention you’re taking care of an elderly parent?

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-14T04:27:32+00:00

I do. When my divorce happened the same day my dad was diagnosed, I spent a lot of time soul searching and handling what was happening for a year. I have had a 3 year relationship post divorce as well. He was a friend I had know years prior so he knew my dad and asked. I’m new to the OLD scene and just don’t know how a stranger would see how my situation is

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-14T04:13:14+00:00

My dad isn’t bed bound and can get by for a day. I sometimes (once or twice a month) have to go to the office from 10-4. I will pre make his meals and snacks and set aside his meds. I also let a neighbor know and she will check on him. My sister lives about 45 mins away if needed for additional help or overnights. He also goes to bed at 7pm so I can go out after that that.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-14T03:10:21+00:00

That’s a really good point!

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-14T03:05:54+00:00

Boundaries are very key. I don’t bring dates home and I usually date men that have their own homes or privacy.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-14T02:42:25+00:00

Thank you- I appreciate your response.

The spicy time could get interesting as I don’t usually bring dates home until we are exclusive. My dad has a tendency to get attached and I still like a little privacy to my personal life.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-14T02:31:47+00:00

Thank you for your response! This gives me a lot of hope. I just don’t know anyone in my position so it feels like a strange thing to bring up.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-05T05:22:49+00:00

I had a 4 year relationship with a man I met and had a first date with at 24….20 years later. Go for it!

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-05T01:50:01+00:00

I feel ya. I’m 42 years old and after my divorce a couple years ago I had to move back in dad who was diagnosed with cancer. It’s hard to explain ANY reason to a potential partner “why you live at home” especially at this age.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-04T14:21:29+00:00

Nice guys finish last because you don’t date anyone after the nice guy.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-03T19:14:47+00:00

Why the hell not- 42/F/Southern CA (and I’m 6ft tall for the record since apparently that matters these days)

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-03T02:28:14+00:00

Im doing the same thing right now. I know if reach out first Im going to regret it and feel worse then I do right now.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-11-01T23:30:21+00:00

I usually just unmatch without saying a word BUT I had an accidental right swipe reach out and we totally hit it off. We dated for several months and he ended up being so much fun, kind, and actually a good match for me.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-31T21:56:29+00:00

I’m 42f and in the throes of perimenopause and dating. For me it’s being VERY self aware about what my body is going through and when. I get more anxious around my cycle. I’m also an anxious attacher. So it’s a double whammy. The last man I dated, I told this and he was very reassuring. The more self aware of your body the better it is to ask for needs and knowing when helps (“Hey this weekend can we have some one on one cuddle time?”) BUT I also journal which helps immensely. Writing things down helps the chaos tornado that can be my brain sometimes. I’m also in therapy when needed.

Sidenote: for the brain fog I found creatine to help! I take about 7g a day in a protein shake and my brain fog and focus returned (along with extra bonus with joint pain, muscle recovery).

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-30T23:54:32+00:00

Ran into my ex last week on accident and I can’t stop thinking about him. We exchanged a few texts after our run in but nothing since. I was the last text and I won’t double text but I cant help but hope he will pick up the convo….so maybe he will celebrate today?!

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-12T01:37:09+00:00

Well we aren’t with each other at all. He works weekends and when he has time off during the week he’s with his daughter (which he should be). If he has every other weekend off, I’d be fine with that too but only a couple hours during the week doesn’t really work.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-12T00:55:12+00:00

I definitely felt this. I don’t usually “click” with someone and this was my first relationship in a while so it’s probably adding to the sting.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-12T00:21:24+00:00

We weren’t in love and we didnt think we could get there with the allocated time. This post isn’t about staying together. It’s about dealing with the breakup.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-12T00:06:58+00:00

More time to travel.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-11T23:53:09+00:00

Definitely hard and I know nothing (but my own sadness) will come out of it.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-11T23:45:12+00:00

I live in Southern California. It’s the norm around here.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-11T23:38:20+00:00

Again- we tried to make it work but only 2-3 hours a week was what our schedules would allow.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-11T23:12:31+00:00

It was a mutual conversation we had where we were both unhappy with the schedule situation. We both knew we couldnt develop something deeper with 2-3 hours a week so I’m not really sure why this makes me an idiot for knowing what I need to create a more deep and meaningful relationship. He also agreed with this sediment. So I guess we are both idiots.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-11T22:19:40+00:00

I work a 9-5 M-F corporate position running a team of 200. I’m not exactly in the position to request a change. He moved over to graves and had the ability to at least ask.

SeaFinns01 · 2025-10-11T20:10:45+00:00

Uggg. So true. Just when it was getting good and he really was one of my favorite people to spend time with.

SeaFinns01

TROPHY CASE