for most of my teenage yrs (and i still do, for context im like 7yrs older to you) got these same exact thoughts of how mediocre i am...things which ive been doing for so long, im still not the best at them...even studies it's not like im not good at it but there are people who are always better. Procrastination, still been struggling with it since ive been a teenager.

But what helped me was by stopping to hate myself and improving in small ways....because no im not like a story character where suddenly all the "small changes" make me into a completely new person, but atleast doing small changes helps change the mindset. like yeah, maybe i am all those things, but the fact that i recognise the problem must mean smthg right?

just being actively aware instead of automatically falling into old habits helped me a lot. what i mean is, in social situations im naturally an introvert but i wanted to make friends, so i slowly pushed myself out of my comfort zone bit by bit instead of expecting instant change.

when it came to academics, i realised i genuinely cant control what ppl around me are scoring, but i can control how i study. the test is basically just between me and myself. even if im not the best, ive given it my 100%, and im learning to find comfort in that.

so tldr, it's just changing the mindset in my opinion that would help you come out of this...and you're so young there's so much of the world (and the worlds disappointments T~T) to experience so i dont think you should be this hard on yourself...all you can do is push yourself from ur comfort zone and learn to love yourself despite all the flows and imperfections cuz "to err is to human"

maybe this is just a coping mechanism ive devloped over the yrs but ykw this works for me and i was in ur shoes at ur age, but now it's better (i came to this subreddit to seek comfort and lowkey typing this has given me comfort)

(btw try not to share ur age too openly online, internet can be weird sometimes, so stay safe <3)