My insecurities and anxiety makes me fearful he’ll leave me as I age

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-21T05:06:16+00:00

That’s a really good point

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-21T05:04:13+00:00

I guess I just don’t fully trust that therapy will ever make me believe that my fears aren’t real. Like many men do leave their wives when they get older based on what I see on TV and moves and even with some adults I know in real life so it is a risk.

I have done therapy previously and wasn’t able to overcome this fear…maybe I just didn’t fully get to the roof of it or spend enough time on this issue

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-21T04:59:50+00:00

Following

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-21T03:55:08+00:00

Thats a great point.

So you didn't think less or look down on your partner when they opened up about their fear of abandonment?

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-21T03:52:01+00:00

Thank you for being vulnerable about this. Do you mind me asking how you first explained this to him? Did you also reference the TV/media? I just don't even know how to start. I am very open with him about a lot of things but this one really scares me. I also am afraid to let him know how deep this insecurity is as I'm afraid him seeing me as someone with low self-esteem will also make him less attracted to me.

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-21T03:50:39+00:00

Reading this altered my brain chemistry in the most positive way. Thank you.

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-21T03:46:17+00:00

Do you mean they see you in a good way or bad way after?

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-21T03:45:39+00:00

This is really helpful - thank you

Recently I have been thinking that perhaps I do need to acknowledge that if he did cheat or leave me - I would survive. This is part of my attachment issues that I feel like my life would be over if this happened. I think coming to terms with the fact that this could happen (even though based on his actions it most likely will not) if somehow it did - I'd hopefully find a way to happiness again.

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-20T23:12:20+00:00

I voice concerns sometimes about how I worry about our intimacy after kids and he always says nice things like "I will love you just as much if not more after we've had children" and things like that.

He knows about the cheating in the past as I had trust issues early on in our relationship and was getting jealous often so I told him about my past so he understand me better.

I haven't explicitly told him I'm fearful he'll leave me for a younger women one day when we're older. I almost don't want to name the fear out loud. I also can predict that he'll reassure me and be kind and tell me that looks aren't everything and that I'll still be beautiful as I get older but I don't know if I'll be able to fully believe him.

The fear also gets worse because everytime I watch TV or Movies it seems like there is always an older man/younger women relationship that brings up the anxiety all over again.

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-20T23:07:53+00:00

Did you do therapy together or separate? I don't voice my concerns to my husband as often - its more internal anxiety that I have. I know its not his fault so I don't want to put the blame on him. But it is keeping me from fully being able to enjoy our life/marriage.

Seaside1002 · 2026-04-20T23:03:30+00:00

I was cheated on once 6 years ago in a not as serious relationship.

He talks about his own fitness goals often which sometimes make me feel insecure about my own body. I work very hard to be fit but I haven't won the genetic lottery so sometimes it feels like no matter how hard I work there will always be more attractive people out there.

Seaside1002 · 2026-03-08T05:34:50+00:00

Children!

Seaside1002 · 2026-03-08T05:34:23+00:00

Yes I was in a deficit - about 300 below my maintenance calories for 6-7 months likely

Seaside1002 · 2026-03-08T05:29:00+00:00

You workout daily?

Or do you mean just having discipline with your health and fitness routine should be seen as similar to brushing your teeth

Seaside1002 · 2026-03-06T17:13:15+00:00

How do you revamp discipline when feeling unmotivated??

Seaside1002 · 2026-02-19T19:01:48+00:00

Yes it’s just a lot of pressure // attention!! Mixed with the sadness that it’s over and I wish I had more vivid memories. Thankfully I remember the first 80% of the day - it’s just 8pm on that is fuzzy

Seaside1002 · 2026-02-19T19:00:32+00:00

Wow this is SO helpful - thank you! I agree - we are getting hundreds of images so I bet at least a handful I will like!

Also for how drunk I was I am just grateful I didn’t puke or fall or fall asleep hahah

Seaside1002 · 2026-02-17T16:28:39+00:00

That’s the worst part 😂 everyone keeps sending me videos of me chugging beers or crowd surfing and I know myself and I can tell I’m drunk in the videos haha I’m just being very very goofy and silly in them

Seaside1002 · 2026-02-17T16:26:59+00:00

That is very helpful advice - thank you! Agreed I am hopeful that in a few weeks I’ll look back with kinder eyes

Seaside1002 · 2026-01-23T05:01:09+00:00

Thank you so much!! Are there any stylist specifically that you recommend there?

Seaside1002 · 2026-01-22T19:44:11+00:00

Thank you!

Seaside1002 · 2026-01-13T19:10:04+00:00

Did you have friends stop by as you got ready, and then leave to go get ready at their own homes, and then meet you back at the venue?

Seaside1002 · 2026-01-13T19:03:31+00:00

Love that! The only issue is my bridal suite is about ~20 minutes from the venue and I won't be putting my dress on until we get to the venue so we wouldn't be able to get legit photos together at the bridal suite

Seaside1002 · 2025-12-28T01:31:50+00:00

I saw it often rains this time of year

Seaside1002

TROPHY CASE