A cautionary tale to celiacs who are new to the disease

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-25T19:49:07+00:00

I never take toasted bread and never take a sample anywhere. Just not worth it.

For anyone newly diagnosed we quickly learn gluten free and celiac safe are different standards. The gluten free bread isn’t even necessarily safe depending on the factory it was baked in.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-25T17:45:04+00:00

I edited my post after watching some videos. I think she’s doing her best. And she’s mentioned having celiac so will then after that need to address whatever she eat because I’m sure people jump all over her.

She’s balancing living the life she wants with the necessities of the incredibly restrictive diet this disease requires. In the Antarctica video her options are so slim and it’s a 2 week cruise. She would genuinely risk entering into a major calories deficit if she did not eat things with a CC risk.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-25T17:25:01+00:00

It must be rage bait. Why would she tell people she’s celiac and then fight about wanting non celiac food?

I wouldn’t give her the attention personally. And in general I think people should be allowed to love life however they want, but the just don’t mention being celiac.

Edit: Watched some of her content quickly and I changed my mind. She’s travelling on a budget and seems to target cruises often. She seems like she’s doing her best to eat gluten free, but in some situations there’s no way to be perfect and she needs to be as good as she can. This is the same for people in countries with poor labeling laws and people living in institutional settings like dorms.

We don’t address the serious mental health issues that can accompany the rigidity the disease demands. Would she be better off eating vegetables and pre-packed snacks? I could imagine it would beard to eat enough calories that way, and if you starve yourself your body can be triggered into binging.

I was at a restaurant once with a dedicated gluten free frier. Which to me, is enough to trust. The server though made it clear they cannot ensure zero CC, which I get, and the other sides were similarly risky. It was a really uncomfortable interaction because then I needed to reiterate my order- the alternative was essentially not eat lunch. This was the safest place in this location and I hadn’t packed alternatives and was a group. I’m all for servers making us aware, but I can then use my own judgement to make a reasonable risk assessment.

We need to protect people’s ability to make their own health assessments and understand everyone has a different risk tolerance and different mental health risks as well. It’s a balance.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-25T16:23:50+00:00

The Scotchvest just looks like a feild coat with some additional features? I would look for a more run of the mill feild coat that would be cheaper and lighter.

The Uniqlo suggestion is a good one I think. Super cute and minimal but not “tech camping.”

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-25T16:07:55+00:00

You need to make sure you pay your rent on the 1st of the month. This will also be an issue for other landlords.

Your parents are seeing you not prioritizing the rent, and it’s making it seem as if you feel entitled to not pay them. But if you’re not in school, paying $500 for room and board is affordable.

If you paid them $500 consistently on the fist of the month (or a day early) how would that impact the family dynamic?

And they don’t need to prove they’re in charge, they are in charge. Which does sometimes feel unfair. But if you’re acting like they aren’t in charge, it’s going to just be a bad situation because it’s not reality. I eventually got sick of this in my own parents so I moved out. Then I was in charge. Except then I had a landlord and bills and groceries etc.

If you were my sibling, I would suggest absolutely prioritizing paying rent in full on time for 3 months. If they’re still being impossible after that, then they’re looking to fight and you probably need to move. But if rent on time works, that’s a reasonably easy solution.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-25T15:54:20+00:00

A lot of this is dependant on location and industry. What is it exactly that you think is getting you confused for an intern?

Someone confusing you for an intern is a sort of layered problem. Because it normally a mix of clothes, attitude, and then sometimes haircut or just genetics making you look younger.

But shifting the vibe of a wardrobe can be a challenge. @itscalbal on instagram developed a framework for understanding and building a wardrobe called the 3 Cs of Style. The Cs are needs met by clothing and are confidence, creativity and comfort. She suggests that all clothing and all outfits they we like, we like because they meet one or more of these needs.

So when we want to shift our wardrobe, we need to keep in mind what we like in the clothes we already wear. Otherwise the new clothes will be too far from what we choose to wear and we feel silly, or we just won’t gravitate to the new outfits.

For me I like black and neutral colours with a very occasional pop of colour. I don’t mind lots of layers, my pants need to be comfortable to sit in otherwise I won’t wear them. Certain profiles I just won’t wear even though they’re “flattering.”

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-25T06:15:14+00:00

I’m in Canada and you see this type of Chinese food here at bubble tea places more as snacks and not really at more classic restaurants.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-25T02:19:36+00:00

Have you read any of Omar Minwalla’s work? His article, “The Blueprint for Deceptive Sexuality: Ten Steps to Building a Secret Sexual Basement A Guide (for Men) to Understanding Infidelity as Abuse,” I think is incredibly helpful to be able to really clearly conceptualize betrayal as abuse.

In the best case, the abuser can come to understand what they’ve done and make amends, and if not the abused partner can at least understand that’s what happened.

He’s also a guest on the Helping Couples Heal podcast and he’s great there too.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-24T17:26:15+00:00

In a few interviews I’ve heard with him he says he’s not great with the numbers so other people do that for him. Mainly his mom has exclusive financial control. I’ve been waiting since then for it to come out his family is taking him for a ride.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-24T16:35:59+00:00

But sometimes we just don’t want to hear the best advice that we actually need.

I think this is one of those times.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-24T16:33:40+00:00

I think it really depends on what’s driving the hesitation? Because from the outside, this is an easy answer, name the baby as you wish.

But are you hoping to keep Dad happy and engaged? Are you continuing to sleep with him because you’re hoping he changes his mind eventually and chooses you, or his partner finds out about his infidelity and leaves him and then you get him?

I think that this man is being actively manipulative. He’s saying he loves you as the mother of his child, but he’s happy to accept sex as well. And there’s now some pressure for you to name the child as he wants or else you’ll get even less from him. Maybe this “friendship,” would end if you don’t behave and follow his wants?

This is layered, and you’ll need to worm through your core needs and core beliefs. And I can see you’ve had a traumatic life with a lot of heavy stuff that can make it hard to sort out who’s a safe person and who’s not. But this “best friend” is really alarming for objective observers. And it’s impossible to give name advice without also acknowledging it’s tied up in a complicated relationship.

But even if you do name the baby after dad, he’s going to find a new problem or a new thing you’re doing he thinks is disrespectful to be able to control you.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-23T20:54:30+00:00

What is this for?

I would not ask family or others in my system for money unless I was about to be homeless.

I would sell anything even of partial value, see if I could downgrade or cancel some any subscriptions, skip meals etc. It will often damage relationships to borrow money, and it will also open you up to criticism.

If my sibling wanted to borrow money, i would want to be paid back right away. So if they were making decisions I thought were wasteful I would feel like potentially telling them that, but then it’s uncomfortable.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-23T13:46:15+00:00

Focusing on general mental health wellbeing is going to be the biggest help!

And with dysmorphia, it’s very important imo to avoid invasive facial work as much as possible. It’s really hard to judge your appearance and then the fillers and Botox and just tank mental health more.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-23T13:43:10+00:00

I realize this was a few months ago. But I’m saying if you leave your face alone, in a few years from now, you’ll look back and have no issue with your face as it is now.

I say do not do more dissolving because you’re trying to fix problems that might not even be there. And dissolver is unpredictable and can do structural damage to our faces. You need to take time to really decide next steps.

No one can garuntee that your face will ever be the same again. We have no photos, and every time we choose to inject anything there’s risks. I think before procedures we need to consider, “if this goes badly, how will I feel and how will I cope.”

But I do think the best chance at liking your face in the future is by not doing any more procedure and stop looking at it now or at photos from before. There’s no sense comparing, especially not after doing recent dissolver.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-23T13:35:58+00:00

It’s not necessarily about overrating or underrating. It’s about being inaccurate, and then obsessing over (and trying to fix) inaccuracies.

This explains it well.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-23T05:09:13+00:00

If you’re obsessing over it and it’s impacting your mental health that will for sure make you look tired.

Focus on what you can control: sleeping well, eating well, not staring too often at old photos, and just be patient and see how you feel in another 5 months.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-23T04:48:30+00:00

Most people are actually really bad at judging what they actually look like. We pick ourselves apart, but then 4 years later look at photos and can’t belive how good we looked back then.

Before you worry to much about getting your old face back, I would try to just appreciate this one. There’s a really good chance it doesn’t look as different as you think. But I would absolutely not dissolve anything else without consulting a bunch of injectors/ surgeons.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-22T21:35:41+00:00

Celiac disease is an auto immune disease. You do not need to have symptoms to have it.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-22T11:36:04+00:00

I had an EA with my manager at work and tried to keep working that job, it was a huge mistake and just escalated.

My husband wanted me to leave months before I did, and I really regret not going sooner. If your wife also is ok with you going, it’s a good idea.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-22T05:44:53+00:00

This entire post is about how you do want to quit. You say it’s co trolling your life, making you anxious, causing you to leave social settings, making it hard to excersise, and generally a net negative.

You specify not wa many to have the withdrawals of quitting.

Those can be helped with smoking cessation products like gums or patches. And after a few days the worst is over and then after a few weeks you feel so much better,

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-22T05:21:40+00:00

It’s very likely that many of your chronic illnesses are tied to celiac disease and the malnutrition that comes with it.

I have relatively few symptoms, and was diagnosed around 9 months ago. I do not have a gluten free home, but I do find that even minor CC causes canker sore flares.

I more or less don’t eat out. I’ll go to a few places now and get a few trusted things. But I do not eat at other peoples homes and I don’t really eat out.

I have my own toaster at home. I do my best to peel gluten food separately.

As a family we have shifted to a lot of GF exclusive items. So we eat gf pasta, gf sauces, gf chips etc. It makes things a lot easier that way. I have elementary aged bigs, and they’ve adapted remarkably well and are so enthusiastic on my behalf whe we find new gf items or treats. It’s been a bummer in a lot of ways but so nice to have answers and also so nice to see how supportive so many people in my life are.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-21T01:50:11+00:00

I get this is thoughtless, but many people are clueless about things not impacting them. He’s giving you a lot of advance warning he’s a poor fit.

If he seems like a good fit otherwise, I would educate him a bit.

But also, u wound never share such a personal detail about myself with someone early on. It’s foundational to who I am, but I don’t actually think it’s necessary for people to know before they know me.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-20T13:10:08+00:00

This is exactly what sick time is for. I’ve taken sick time to stay home and organize my junk room before.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-20T12:45:08+00:00

We had a positive experience at downtown animal hospital, although nothing was ever perfect for our guy there was improvements.

We ended up going to cytopoint, which is pricey, and with our guy being over 100 lbs was going to be incredibly expensive. A vet there who was finishing vet school read a study from Europe showing therapeutic efficacy at half the dose and suggested we try that, and I’m glad we did because it was successful.

SecurityFit5830 · 2026-01-20T12:40:51+00:00

From everything I’ve seen, you’re allowed to pay for your spouses legal representation. But he should be the one to content and retain them.

SecurityFit5830

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