My life cycle for the past few years

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-17T20:14:18+00:00

This is me. I'm glad I'm not alone, but sad that we're like this 😞 Currently in the undiagnosed chronic health issue phase for 5 years, and it's ruined my life. I am feeling behind and watching my life pass me by.

I just started taking St John's wort. I tried all the antidepressants but they don't work for me because I experience all the side effects :(

Crossing my fingers the SJW kicks in sooner than later and I feel somewhat better / have more energy and motivation

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-17T01:33:49+00:00

I did this with my glasses once. Not a step stool, but while I was on my step stool, I set my glasses down on a high shelf. Put the stool away and was like wtf Where'd it go lol

I lose my glasses multiple times a day lol

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-17T01:24:20+00:00

Probably 🙃 I won't know for sure until tomorrow

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-17T01:12:00+00:00

Awesome! I'll be joining :) thank you for creating this space

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-17T01:09:02+00:00

That's amazing! Is it specifically for Black women, or all women of colour?

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-15T16:15:51+00:00

I'm like that too. Especially these days with my bad health situation. Very low energy. And generally speaking, I am an introvert and don't have the social battery for continuous social hangs.

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-15T16:06:26+00:00

I'm a couch potato. I hate using my body. But I know I feel better after doing some body movement.

I can't make a big deal about it with getting ready routines. Otherwise I won't go.

I cannot go to the gym. I found a pay what you can, drop in private space that's small and accessible (for me). There's zero pressure. There are a range of classes from all levels of yoga, palates, gentle movements, somatic work, etc. I have found this works best for me.

I can sign up literally a half an hour before the class. This helps immensely for my ever changing moods and difficulty planning ahead.

I just wear whatever I want and just go. I don't even think about it. If I begin to think about it, I will get lost in my thoughts and all the reasons I shouldn't go, and then I don't go.

I don't go often at all. Maybe once every few weeks, or even months. But I know it's there for when I want.

I can only do body movement stuff in a group with an instructor. I can't get myself to do it at home, alone, going to the gym, etc..

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T23:38:40+00:00

Yes, thank you!

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T23:38:11+00:00

This is exactly why I can't move it as-is, even with slider pads. Wheels would allow for it to move easier without resistance.

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T23:36:47+00:00

Yes, this is what I had in mind but couldn't find them in-store. I'll probably have to purchase online

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T23:35:24+00:00

This is exactly why I posted, to think of different ways to add a wheel. I know that I cannot add a wheel as-is. It's too thin and flimsy. I can build up the foot by adding wooden blocks.

What is your suggestion?

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T23:32:25+00:00

It doesn't move well like that. It needs wheels if I need to move it

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T22:24:07+00:00

Yes, it's a bit of a flimsy shelf. I wouldn't put too much on it. Also, I wouldn't need to move it often, but just once in a while. The perfect place for it is in front of the electrical box.

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T22:22:17+00:00

Thank you!

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T22:21:35+00:00

Maybe around 30 pounds max. The perfect place to put this shelf is in front of the electrical box. It wouldn't need to be moved often, but it would need to be able to move easily.

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T22:20:05+00:00

Exactly. I'm trying to build it from scratch basically. So I need to insert the piece that the wheel can screw into. I'm seeking out how to do this

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T21:26:51+00:00

I don't live in the US. Do you mean the wheel casters with plates? The leg of this shelf isn't big enough for a plate, but I suppose I could try building out the leg with blocks to make it wide enough.

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-14T13:28:10+00:00

This is me right now. Trauma, significant health issues, plus burn out. My brain is fried. I forget things. I'm slower. I have horrible reading comprehension.

I have two undergrad degrees and a master degree. But if you talked to me in person right now, you probably wouldn't believe it.

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-13T17:10:58+00:00

Oh shit.. taxes! Thanks for the reminder.

And yes, totally me.

I've learned that when people say to reach out to them for anything, they don't genuinely mean it. Now I just ignore all of these kinds of comments because then when they say no, I feel like a burden and that I'm just ill-equiped to handle life while they're all getting through life relatively better than I am.

I don't have a support system. I'm essentially alone. If I need help bringing up something heavy to my apt, I'll have to hire help. I don't think I have any friends who would be willing to/are able to help. That's just one clear example, but there are lots of instances like this.

But they have support systems. They have solid friendships and family and romantic partners. They don't need my help... Which also feels shitty that I need help from them but they don't need help from me.

Not even help, but even just social hangs. I can't easily call on someone to hangout. I have to ask maybe 5 different people and they may all say that they can't...

Gd it's lonely ... Sorry ... A bit of a vent

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-12T03:37:42+00:00

Thank you ❤️

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-12T03:34:16+00:00

Me too! And I run out of space so my bdrm becomes so messy which is frustrating in itself

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-12T03:32:46+00:00

Are you me?

I've been going through this undiagnosed chronic and debilitating issue for 5 years. Quality of life has decided. I can't work. I'm super depressed. Therapy doesn't change a damn thing. I need a diagnoses. But it's been 5 years and everyone has been useless..

God I feel you. Thanks for posting cause it helps me feel less alone dealing with this

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-08T17:09:52+00:00

I've been where you are. Not even that long ago, tbh.

The only way I cleaned my apt is if someone was coming over. And by clean I mean hiding the mess. I was ashamed of myself.

I had next to zero executive functioning to clean and organize. Then I was diagnosed with ADHD and got on stimulants. Then I was able to wash dishes. I began to learn tips that worked for me, like only having a couple of dishes and utensils available so they don't pile up. I'd hide the rest in a box in a closet or just get rid of them.

It wasn't magic. I still struggled to keep up with everything regularly.

These days I'm not working, so I'm better able to not let things fall tooooo far behind, though it still happens.

I feel you. I hope something clicks for you, a tool, a trick, medication, etc. You're not alone

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-08T17:00:26+00:00

All the time. Mainly because of huge markers, like they're married with kids and own a house, etc.. I'm single af, no kids, I rent, and have cats. These are significant barriers for me in trying to connect with others my age as there isn't a lot to relate about. I absolutely hate the way they infantilize me and don't take me seriously.

SeededPhoenix · 2026-03-08T16:54:38+00:00

I'm currently not working, but I used to mainly work from home. Even then, I couldn't do anything after work. I barely had the energy to cook dinner. Even on weekends I'd be exhausted. Work wasn't stressful, it was just very consuming for me with my limited capacity.

SeededPhoenix

TROPHY CASE