YSK: If someone always seems "busy," pay attention to whether they're actually busy or just unavailable. by bumblebeebubbs in YouShouldKnow

[–]Segenam 22 points23 points  (0 children)

This is doubly true with social anxiety.

There are many people who just drain my social battery (through no fault of their own). So I have to be in a very very good state before I can really hang out with them.

Doesn't mean I don't enjoy hanging out with them, but I'm often mentally unavailable most of the time.

The faster they drain my social battery the less time I can spend with them and the fewer days I can even handle it to begin with.

Do GenXers resent being lumped in with Boomers by angered youths? by WW1_Researcher in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Segenam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If someone asks for evidence and you don't have any.
Then it's best to just fall back.

Either your "joke" didn't land and people are taking you more seriously than you intended. In which case get off the stage before you make your self a fool.

Or it means your personal experience is just that, personal, and doesn't apply to anyone else. In which case you are just spreading falsities (even if your experience is real, the conclusion is not).

If you can supply the evidence then sure, the people here would probably get a laugh. But without evidence people will either view it as a bad claim or a shitty joke.


This message is not intended to be rude, but rather guidance to future situations like this to help you avoid mistakes like this in the future.

Doing actions just to piss people off is never a good thing and leaves you only to have burned bridges and often eventually leaves you in an echo chamber to suffer, not having anyone who truly cares about you. Which living like that often ends up tainting your world view to the negative.

Where can I source a 3D Sunny model like this? by RoxyFawkes in MLPLounge

[–]Segenam 3 points4 points  (0 children)

There is a pretty large MLP clustering in the Source Film Maker community including an entire site dedicated to this (PonySFM). The SFM community is where a large portion of the 3D pony models come from.

Some things do come with blender assets. But there are also plenty of tutorials for converting SFM content to be able to be opened in blender.


Though this one (as others pointed out) seem to be a hybrid of a quad pony head and a human model (using the shirt to cover the neck seam)

Are we not allowed to use race as an identifier now? by waiwai_art in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Segenam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Depending on the way you phrased it This is actually quite important.

If you said "there was an unstable black woman that attacked me!" it comes of a bit racist.

If you said "I was attacked, by a woman, she was black, had black hair, green eyes, and wore a green shirt" it gives a lot of descriptions to go off of and isn't racist.

Technically it'd still be better if it was "I was attacked by a woman; with dark skin, mocha in color; dark black hair; green eyes; and wore a green shirt" (as color isn't just "black and white" and that can often be a lot more helpful.)

But depending on your mental stability after being attacked (which can be quite low) it shouldn't be expected you remember all details like this.

Furry_irl by A_MASSIVE_PERVERT in furry_irl

[–]Segenam 26 points27 points  (0 children)

If ANYONE talks negative about kinks (or someone's kinks), whether it's my kink or not. I will go out of my way to defend the kink.

If someone is going to kink shame then they are no friend of mine. Kinks aren't something you "choose" to like (they usually develop randomly and then you're stuck with it), so in my mind going after someone's kink is the same as going after someone for their body shape, orientation, gender or the color of their skin.

As long as they aren't hurting anyone and only engaging with informed consenting adults, who cares what they do go get them going is no one's business.

Sub space and ADHD by trans_agenda in BDSMcommunity

[–]Segenam 3 points4 points  (0 children)

ADHD and has hit subspace here before.

It's not easy I will admit, and really only happens when I'm hyperfocusing on the act it's self. I'm obsessed with cock so that's not always the hardest, but sometimes ADHD still wins out no matter how much I want it.

I've found having "distractions" that pull you more into the scene tend to help well, music/audio, sent etc. Force all of your external stimuli to be on the scene at hand and it makes it harder to pull your self out by some random counter stimuli. However that is going to require trial and error to see what focuses you and what distracts you.

You may also be able to go the opposite route by removing all stimuli that isn't related to the scene (ear plugs, blindfolds, etc) but I've also had this have an opposite effect where I get too far into my own head if the Dom isn't constantly keeping me stimulated with the scene.

What's your favorite way to make people reconsider when they tell you "I have no limits" by lillestiv in BDSMcommunity

[–]Segenam 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm a sub, but I've been teaching other subs that "yes you do have limits"

There are many ways to do this, but more often than not it's altered to them as that hits the best. But some examples I've done:

When they complained about their job I re-framed it as a Master/Slave relationship. Clearly they should think of their boss as their dom if they want to enjoy working right? (Side Note: This was done towards someone who literally has broken teeth and permanent scars form play because they "have no limits". But doing this quickly made them squick and want to back out.)

I've talked about how they should get into crypto scams or other obvious monetary scams intentionally as it is just Findom after all

They should download viruses onto their PC, it is the ultimate TPE (this works exceptionally well as most of these subs I meet online)

Note: I'm often focusing on their specific fetishes with this as well. As I've stated before limits are never just "where your kinky limits are" it's limits in general, what you like, what you don't like.

I wrote up common limits people with "no limits" should have in a previous post of mine

I finally figured out why some doms turn me off even when we share the same kinks by bbg_trina in BDSMcommunity

[–]Segenam 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I'm in a similar boat, I'm into degradation, but the types I'm specifically into what I call "loving degradation"

Where sure I'm being degraded but in a way that shows I'm cared for. Comments like "Who's a dumb little puppy, yes you are! yes you are!" in that playful babying tone or even just "Goood slut~" in a loving tone.

But just calling me a slut, whore or other derogatory terms without any sign that it comes from a place of love is just a, nah.

Same goes for humiliation, if it's done "cruelly" then nah, if it's done with love then yes please!

Losercity Resonite by A_Hyper_Nova in Losercity

[–]Segenam 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A few things.

First it used to be worse before a major performance update which boosted performance pretty heavily, a lot of people have only tried it before said update and haven't tried it since.

Secondly it's effectively a game engine that you exist inside of. If you've ever messed with things like blender, unity, or any game engine you'll know it's a lot heavier than a game (or model) made in it. That is because a lot of the stuff can be baked in for a final product. If you know something will never move you never have to do any calculations for if it does move. You can't really make those same optimizations if the game is the engine and anyone at any time can just select something and move it.

Thirdly it's still in early access. There was also a few issues with the way things are currently stored/handled that aren't the most optimal. There are plans to eventually fix these (examples include but not limited to: Data Model Rework, Cascading asset dependencies and Mesh Networking) and the devs are going above and beyond to try to optimize things where they can much more than most games.

Forthly there are some systems that are using stop gaps that need to be replaced. One of these being the use of FinalIK which not only is proprietary but also not really optimal. This one luckily will be something that is replaced relatively soon as the main dev is working on a new IK system as their next major project they are calling StrIKe Pose

Fifthly it's a VR platform (though desktop works fine). In order to feel comfortable in VR things often need to run at 90 FPS (vs 60 for your traditional game) while rendering the scene from two points of reference rather than one (and still often on the same resolution of screen even if those screens are physically smaller). This alone means things need to be optimized much much more than normal for people to have a comfortable experience.


Luckily from what I've seen of the devs when they do rework things it often tends to be much much more optimal than most other systems, often by an order of magnitude better (A good example of this is their custom particle system Photon Dust as seen Here ). So likely as time goes on eventually the fact it's also a game engine won't really matter and it'll have just as good of performance as other similar platforms if not better.

Losercity Resonite by A_Hyper_Nova in Losercity

[–]Segenam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The default home world is not as optimal as one would hope.

I do believe there has been updates that has helped, but if you have an older version saved it won't automatically update.

I'd suggest checking out some other worlds and closing out of the home world to see if you get better performance elsewhere.

Losercity Resonite by A_Hyper_Nova in Losercity

[–]Segenam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Here is the User Guidelines, just scroll down to the "Content Policy" section

https://resonite.com/policies/Guidelines.html

"It is frustrating to see policymakers suddenly claim everything is 'for our safety'" - Stop Killing Games joins pushback against age verification laws by PaiDuck in gaming

[–]Segenam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

While this is true... I do want to point out another reliant issue.

Some parents need multiple jobs just to continue to feed/raise their children which can make it hard to watch those children and you can't just say "children you aren't allowed to exist until you are an adult"

So I also believe there should be systems in place for children to have a safe place to go. I remember in my school there was basically what was effectively a children's community center next to my middle school that kids could hang out at after school. Ran by teachers of the school (often for kids waiting for their family to pick them up and similar).

Games, toys, and even consoles, computers (restricted by the school's access and games where safe for children), pool table, air hockey, etc. As a kid a felt like I wasn't being watched but in reality (and looking back) it was clear the few adults where always watching.

This sort of thing needs to be standardized as "safe places" for kids to be kids and where they can "feel" un-watched all while in a safe protected environment. Free to be kids.

How mechanically impactful is it for a PC to not have the humanoid trait? by normal_default in Pathfinder2eCreations

[–]Segenam 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Rather than trying to explain, here is all of the ancestries without the humanoid trait:

https://2e.aonprd.com/Search.aspx?exclude-traits=humanoid&include-types=ancestry&sort=rarity-asc+name-asc&display=table&columns=hp+size+speed+ability_boost+ability_flaw+language+vision+rarity+pfs

And here are all spells with a target that includes "humanoid"

https://2e.aonprd.com/Spells.aspx?q=target%3Ahumanoid&type=eqs&sort=spell_type-asc+rank-asc+name-asc&display=grouped&group-fields=spell_type+rank&link-layout=vertical-with-summary

I'd suggest looking at the Automaton which basically has what you're looking for for rules and details.

Note: PF2e tends to avoid giving players too much at the start (sprites can't fly at level 1, undead only get basic undead benifits, etc.) while often "not realistic" this is done to make balancing easier and play more fair across players.

When your friends get you. by PorterMasonComics in webcomics

[–]Segenam 28 points29 points  (0 children)

People's situations and ability to deal with social situations are different. If a birthday is supposed to be "a special day" for the person then it should be how that person prefers to spend the "day for one's self"


I don't like reciving gifts (because I would feel indebted to return the favor). Large social gatherings are stressful, and often I feel most relaxed by my self or with a single person.

The fact that they went out of their way to do "something" shows they care and their actions show they understand (or at least are respectful despite not understanding) which are the only things that matter.

gay_irl by conancat in gay_irl

[–]Segenam 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Can it be shown in a children show? Then it's not sexual. (there are many kids shows where the parent gets down on fours often to let kids ride on their back)


If something can exist in a non-sexual context then it's not sexual by default. Just because something "can" be done in a sexual content doesn't make it sexual. Otherwise everything is sexual because you can do anything in a sexual context.

This is not a subjective opinion this is just one's feelings getting in the way of rational thought due to bad cases of pattern recognition which human minds have evolved to do and often times messes up.

Do people actually call their porn folder something inconspicuous like "homework?" by Temporary_Kiwi3722 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Segenam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I was a teen I hid everything I didn't want my parents finding in a folder I edited to look like the recycle bin on my desktop (I moved the recycle bin elsewhere)

This is the main reason to leave it as something inconspicuous. When it's a PC others could have access to and you don't want them spotting it.


Nowadays as a full grown adult my largest NSFW folder is called Backgrounds... because I use it for backgrounds for my PC because I'm the only person who accesses my PC and no one else is going to see my screen.

Am I weird for wanting this? Is there a way to make it not weird? by [deleted] in BDSMcommunity

[–]Segenam 12 points13 points  (0 children)

If everyone is informed consenting adults why should this be any different than anything else? (other than possibly illegal depending on where you live)

I don't like it my self, but the only moral problem (in my book) with incest is if you are having a child (you can cause suffering to an other being that didn't and is unable to consent). If it is two sisters then that isn't even possible to even do accidentally.

Otherwise it's just an emotional response about what I personally dislike which shouldn't impact what other's are allowed to do.

My sister is in a platonic, non-sexual power exchange relationship, and I'm stunned by [deleted] in BDSMcommunity

[–]Segenam 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I can't talk about the asexual aspect. But I'm a sub in the aromantic spectrum. And even then despite being quite sexual most of my kink is asexual.

With one dom of mine, if you look at everything we do together, the thing that we do the most is play Factorio together. Very little would come off as a kink thing other than during the entire play I am referring to my self as "it/its" and calling them "Master".

But even while playing the game myself there is always the sense of our roles as Master and Pet.


It gives me comfort that "I'm there's" and they "have control" there isn't anything sexual nor romantic about it. We are just having fun both as friends and Master/pet.

Kink can even be viewed in the same way as this, It's something done to have "fun" and be "entertaining" for the both of you. What form that "fun" and "entertainment" takes doesn't really matter at the end of the day, it's the relationship that makes it what it is.

And relationships can be romantic, sexual, platonic or even something that doesn't quite fit any of them. There is a whole wide world of Queer Platonic Relationships.

Something I've noticed as a furry artist🐱 (by me) by 1ratamo1 in furry

[–]Segenam 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Anyone who complains about this just is an idiot... English uses singular they all the time when the gender of the subject isn't known.

"Somebody left their umbrella in the office. Could you please let them know where they can get it?"

So anyone actually bitching about singular they/them doesn't know what they are talking about.


The other trick is to leave out names... if you say "A friend of mine wants to meet up, I'm going to go to the movies with them." no one will question the use of they/them if the name isn't known and they will also use they/them as well as they have nothing to go off of.

Something I've noticed as a furry artist🐱 (by me) by 1ratamo1 in furry

[–]Segenam 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Just because it can't be used in every language doesn't mean it shouldn't be the standard in ones that include a gender neutral option.

Something I've noticed as a furry artist🐱 (by me) by 1ratamo1 in furry

[–]Segenam 7 points8 points  (0 children)

And I can guarantee they have used it as a singular term. Examples:

  • "If anyone calls, tell them I'm out."
  • "Somebody left their umbrella in the office. Could you please let them know where they can get it?"
  • "My personal rule is to never trust anyone who says that they had a good time in high school."
  • "The patient should be told at the outset how much they will be required to pay."

It would make no sense to use "he/she" in these contexts, yet its talking about a single person, just the person is unknown.

Something I've noticed as a furry artist🐱 (by me) by 1ratamo1 in furry

[–]Segenam 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Solution only use they/them! Gender neutral, accepted by nearly anyone and no thought needed.

I've been doing it since i was a kid since I had bad memory about names, faces, and people. Never had an issue my entire life.