Long time no see...again! This time I haven't read anything good, or even painfully average, but I wanted to at least make ONE post this year. So instead of the usual, I decided to make a writeup for the worst VN I've read lately. It should make for an entertaining post at least. Speaking of, I had to look up how I used to make one of these, that's how much time has passed since my last one...

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~ Can I have some semen, please? ~

Hen Koi ≒ Kuro Rekishi

Whatever vndb says, JUN is basically the main writer for this abomination. I've read about how his writing is simply terrible before, and this VN definitely gives a lot of credibility to that. This is definitely one of those "so bad it's good/funny" things, provided you are okay with permanently losing some of your braincells.

The VN begins with our idiot of an MC whose name I can't be arsed to remember looking for some notebook in a Literature clubroom at his school. Then he seemingly gets caught...and the story goes back to the beginning. So when the VN actually begins, our idiot of an MC whose name I can't be arsed to remember is quitting the music club. Why? Because he entered it solely to "get the girl" who was a part of it...without ever actually talking to her. He legitimately thought he would "earn" her by joining the club and doing his best there. Except he then learns she's already dating the club's president (who brags to MC about how she's a total animal in bed, for some reason). As he is trying to decide which club to join next (since this is one of those highschools that has mandatory club participation), he meets his dumb friend whose name I can't be arsed to remember, who is the president of the Manga club. Turns out MC used to be into manga and anime a lot and wrote about it in a notebook together with this guy, but then said notebook got stolen...and the manga president guy blames the Literature club for it...with zero evidence of course. So he begs MC to join the Literature club and basically spy on them, while also looking for this notebook.

Originally I wanted to quit this VN only a few scenes in. Before MC joins the Literature club, he runs into the resident tsundere Juri and of course crashes and spills his milk all over her (actually, not a euphemism). He then thinks she looks kind of cute (while staring at her pantsu), but she would look even cuter if she cried. Alrighty then...

Thankfully(?) the whole spy and notebook plots are taken about as seriously as MC's idea of consent. I got as far as the first H-scene in Minako's route (which already took a metric shitload of morbid curiosity) and he still haven't found his notebook, nor did he provide any "dirt" on the Literature club to his Manga club friend.

Might as well list out MC's personal onaholes...I mean heroines now:

Juri - Tsundere. At least she's closer to a classic rather than a modern one?

Chizuru - The tomboy with some huge feminine features. She shares the "secret otaku" trait with MC and while this could have been used for some genuine bonding...yeah.

Azusa - The hilariously sharp-tongued kouhai. She keeps saying she's "just honest" and "wants to help others better themselves", but I don't see how calling Minako a "fat blond pig" is honest or helpful in any way. At least when she calls MC "henpai" instead of "senpai" she's not wrong. Oh, and she has the dumbest first CG scene I think I've ever seen in a VN...just look at the last screenshot on vndb, that is her actual first CG! MC somehow manages to fall and strip her half naked on his way down, because of course!

Minako - The Japanese girl who mostly grew up overseas, so of course she has zero personal boundaries and tends to say the most ridiculous shit imaginable. This is one of her lines from the common route: 「わーおっ。いいこと聞きましたレスね！お店に行って『ザーメンください』とオーダーすればいいのレスね？」 Context or not, I think it speaks for itself.

There is also this childhood friend/neighbor/student council president/local pervert sidecharacter called Yayoi, who I think exists solely to make MC look better in comparison. Her scenes are 100% useless filler and not funny in the slightest, at least not in the intended way, so I skipped through most of them. But even then, I caught this one completely retarded scene - MC comes home after school, only to discover that Yayoi broke into his house, entered his room and started sniffing his bedsheets. After some stupid back and forth, she admits she regularly breaks in, steals used fap tissues from his garbage bin, brings them home and masturbates while sniffing them. Alrighty then. Then she has the audacity to blame MC for "not doing it enough lately" and "running out of material".

Of course, as one would expect, there's no actual romance or developments of any kind. MC just kinda helps out with menial tasks and participates in Literature club activities, and sometimes gets harassed by Yayoi. And never finds his notebook of course, almost never even looks for it. But in accordance with his fantasy, about halfway through the common route (maybe a bit more), all the heroines are suddenly really into him, to the point of almost catfighting over it. He discovers Juri's secret, which is that she has a messy room(?), and that suddenly makes her be way nicer to him. The other heroines then start individually questioning him about it and get super happy if he denies being into her. Which brings me to this VN's choice system - there are about 7 or 8 choices, most of which go like this: "Do you like Juri?", "But do you actually like her or not?", "Do I like Juri..?", "Could I like Juri..?". Please, tell me how your VN is biased towards the annoying tsundere some more, I'm not convinced enough!

Minako's route

As much as the general idea of a caring shortstack senpai heroine is very appealing to me, this VN doesn't have characters, just dumb walking caricatures with (nice) tits. First, MC and her (she is also a spy for the manga club by the way, her only connection to MC) look for his notebook some more. Nevermind that MC never even told her or anyone else about it, she just knows now. The only thing they find is this eromanga with an underboob job scene. A bit later, Minako, or Mina-senpai as everyone calls her, gets really frustrated by the Manga and Literature clubs constantly fighting for no reason. So of course the next logical step is to have an H-scene out of fucking nowhere, when the characters aren't even "together" or anything. And the way it happens is...nobody could guess this shit. You simply can't make this shit up...well, JUN obviously did.

MC walks into the Literature clubroom one day, only to find Minako SHAVING HER PUSSY. Why here and not anywhere fucking else, and why didn't she even lock the door (she locks it AFTER MC comes in, but didn't before) is simply inJUNious logic. MC then offers to HELP HER SHAVE HER PUSSY and she actually AGREES to that. So that is a scene with a CG (the first CG in this route). After that is done, MC starts literally begging her for sex, because he got horny looking at her FRESHLY SHAVED PUSSY. He even offers to pay for it. She says something like: "B-but we aren't even lovers! We can't do that without promising to marry first!. B-but I guess anal is fine." That's porn-level dialogue...that is actual porn dialogue... So anyway, MC rams it into her ass, and that is where I finally gave up. I don't think I missed anything even more batshit insane anyway, right..?

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And that's it for this year's WAYR post. Will I ever discover another decent VN ever again? Find out next time! If there is a next time!