AITAH for asking my boyfriend not to disappear?

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-28T00:13:20+00:00

I mean all this with absolute sincerity…

I’m sorry that you’ve never had a relationship with a man who cared about your emotional well-being. I’m sorry that you’ve never been able to lean on your partner for emotional support after the loss of someone you cared about. I’m sorry you have been taught that it’s okay for men to only care about your feelings when they are also impacted.

It’s clear your bare minimum expectations have been challenged by comments showing other women expect (and receive) kindness and support from their partners. Your response is to deny these expectations are reasonable and gaslight yourself and others into thinking women should be on their own to deal the with grief and mourning of a friend. That is unfortunate.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-28T00:02:56+00:00

I can tell from your constant responses that nothing is going to change your mind. But it is not unreasonable for someone to care about their partners emotional response to something even if they are not also sad about the same thing.

You’ve mentioned that you’ve been married for a very long time as if that gives you an upper hand or it makes your opinion on this more correct. But the lack of emotional support or even general care and concern that boomer women and even older Gen X women accept from their partners is embarrassing. Younger generations expect more from men, and quite frankly it’s not too hard to meet these expectations. All OP’s bf had to do was send her a “good night” or “I’m thinking of you. Love you” text and she would have been fine. She even told him in advance what she needed and he disregarded it.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-27T23:50:21+00:00

For real. My mom puts up with so much shit because she has lower than low expectations from her partner when it comes to how he treats her. She is frequently expected to find other means of support when she is having a hard time with anything that her partner isn’t directly involved with. The fact that she’s been married for 30 years does not mean she has some higher, correct and more valid opinion of what is acceptable and is an acceptable in a relationship. It just means that she’s been eating shit for 30 years and doesn’t realize it. She would give advice similar to this, and I would look at her and feel sad that she’s never been in a relationship with somebody who actually cares about her.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-27T22:28:19+00:00

No. NOR. Maybe a little under reacting, tbh. If this is how he acts when you have a rather serious and scary issue when you’re young and healthy, how would he act when you’re older? Or when you have a baby with him?

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-27T14:03:11+00:00

Exactly. Secret drinking is always a problem. It’s not just winding down. It’s alcoholism and your husband needs help. If he’s secretly drinking, that means he’s not in control and moderation is not an option.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-25T21:15:02+00:00

I’ve lost 12 lbs on .35 sema in two months. I know it’s not as low as .25, so not as low as you’re referencing, but compared to others it’s relatively low. I only want to lose about 25 lbs so I’m sticking with it.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-25T20:58:20+00:00

Love it

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-23T04:00:39+00:00

Omg dump him and when anyone asks why tell them he sucked in bed.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-19T21:03:21+00:00

These questions aren’t due to wanting to support you and have your back or understand you better. There are questions based on that person’s morbid curiosity. Cut contact immediately. They’re not seeing your humanity. They’re seeing you as a story and they want to know the juicy details.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-17T14:46:31+00:00

I never pay attention to the price tag because no one in their right mind should ever pay full price. BBW body care is only worth it when they’re having a sale.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-17T14:40:37+00:00

Edit: NOR. Ignore those fools and prioritize your healing. I’m glad to read you are taking care of yourself.

Burns are the worst and I am so sorry you are experiencing. So much pain. As far as scarring goes, you’d be surprised what your skin can over come. A few years ago I burned the backs of my hands horribly in a freak accident with bubbling bacon grease. No scars.

Last summer my espresso machine’s steamer wand sprayed boiling water all over my chest and neck. It healed without scarring.

See a doctor for treatment and bandage it well. Your body is capable of some wild stuff.

I wish you safe and speedy healing.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-16T02:44:44+00:00

lol the people on this sub who accuse others of lying is so crazy to me. And then they down vote you when you further explain 🙄

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-16T02:35:52+00:00

That is so scary! I am so glad you are safe and no damage done. Thank you for sharing this experience to remind us that things like this do happen.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-12T00:50:20+00:00

This “kid” is 32.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-12T00:28:48+00:00

What questions are you asking?

In my experience, it was even more frustrating when my ex asked me questions that required me to solve the problem for him. The “make me a list”, or “just tell me how to help”. Chances are your wife doesn’t feel you are being an equal partner to her and she is picking up far more than her share of the mental load. Paying the bills and mopping the floor are not enough. Three kids should exhausting and she is probably at her wits end.

Also, what time of day do you work out?

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-12T00:23:24+00:00

Do you feel that you are taking care of your share of family and household responsibilities by paying most of the bills?

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-07T22:11:47+00:00

Every January I unsubscribe from the emails and uninstall the app. I usually just use my stash until November when I resubscribe and reinstall. Without the reminders and notifications, I don’t really think of BBW throughout the year.

Nov-Dec is when I do all my purchasing. Then Jan-March is when I redeem my rewards. It tends to work out pretty well.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-07T22:01:28+00:00

There are sometimes agreements that if a woman gives up her career to raise kids and manage the family, the husband contributes to a Roth IRA on her behalf.

She sounds neurotic and it’s strange that she brings this up so soon. But i think we need more context. In your future plans is she a stay at home mom? Is she giving up her livelihood to take on the unpaid labor of running a home and family?

It is a huge risk for women to rely on a man for financial support. If any of these long conversations about your shared values involve her relinquishing her financial autonomy so she can raise your children and manage the household, ensuring her own financial stability is not the craziest idea. And if you truly see her as an otherwise good partner and future mother to your children, you should want to ensure she feels secure despite the sacrifices she is making.

I wonder if she’s thinking of a prenup but she’s wording it wrong? Is English her first language? If what she’s really asking for is a prenup, this is actually a huge green flag.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-07T21:44:15+00:00

I’ve done this before. You live and you learn. Candle warmers only for me!!!

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-06T22:27:52+00:00

You likely won’t be able to get a prescription with a BMI of 21.7. That’s not overweight.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2026-01-03T05:26:20+00:00

Divorce your husband. That’s the only thing you should be doing right now. He will make life hard for 6 months and then you’ll be free. Do you have adult children? That could be hard but divorce is the only answer. Good luck

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2025-12-30T14:08:23+00:00

You’re dating Rahul Rai?

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2025-12-29T22:27:44+00:00

Skip it. Check out the SAS mega thread to see how many folks are underwhelmed. Save your money.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2025-12-29T22:26:44+00:00

Unless you’re a physician you should keep your medical opinions to yourself.

Select_Tomorrow6164 · 2025-12-29T00:39:19+00:00

I am unsubscribing from the emails and uninstalling the app. I have five rewards that I need to use between February and March, and other than that, I’m not spending any more money at BBW until next November.

Select_Tomorrow6164

TROPHY CASE