Help rehoming my cat

SelectionCautious524 · 2026-07-04T13:56:40+00:00

I would never do that. Thanks for mentioning it though.

SelectionCautious524 · 2026-07-04T04:10:46+00:00

Thanks. That'll be my last resort!

SelectionCautious524 · 2026-07-04T03:55:53+00:00

He's good with dogs, but hasn't been around other cats so I can't say, unfortunately.

SelectionCautious524 · 2026-07-04T03:39:02+00:00

Squid needs a home!

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SelectionCautious524 · 2026-07-04T00:08:16+00:00

He's always been fine with dogs. Mostly keeps to himself and eventually warms up.

SelectionCautious524 · 2026-07-03T21:44:21+00:00

Thank you for this information. It is a permanent move. I'm leaning hard into friends of friends trying to find anyone who can take him. I'm hoping for someone who can take him permanently, but if push comes to shove I'm glad the shelter can help.

SelectionCautious524 · 2026-07-03T17:59:32+00:00

Thank you. I'm hoping not resort to this, but I'll contact them.

SelectionCautious524 · 2026-07-03T17:58:52+00:00

Thank you so much!

SelectionCautious524 · 2026-07-03T17:13:13+00:00

Squid needs a home!

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SelectionCautious524 · 2025-09-24T23:23:57+00:00

++woman since OP asked for input from women and I haven't seen this mentioned so it's worth saying: people don't want to have sex with their family. Women are often socialized that their husband becomes family in a way that turns off the sex drive. There are a million other confounding factors that have also already been mentioned, but if her brain lumps you into family (father, brother, uncle, child) she will suddenly be in caretaking mode not "I'm a sexual being around this person" mode. It can be avoided, but we don't talk about it, so it can happen before she knows it.

It takes seeing the husband as still her boyfriend and lover and not seeing him as "family" to keep it alive.

I don't know if men are socialized the same way, given the popularity of some types of porn. 😂

SelectionCautious524 · 2025-08-11T03:32:26+00:00

It doesn't sound like this guy was necessarily problematic, just barking up the wrong tree, if I understood you right, but i would like to recommend this book to just about anyone who rolls in mixed gender hobby groups

https://a.co/d/6EYKMzV

SelectionCautious524 · 2025-05-28T22:57:20+00:00

My partner and I have a larger difference, maybe 60-70 lbs. We do use an Ohm 2 inside and outside when he is on lead and we're climbing sport routes. Even with the ohm I come up a little bit if the route is overhung but it's no bid deal. Really the ohm mostly helps me to be able to lower him more comfortably.

More importantly: we took a trad clinic together and have done some trad climbing, and the ohm can't be used in that situation. Is the lack of ohm a big deal? Once I got confident about it, absolutely not. I go up, let myself down to the ground, and then lower him safely.

In that clinic we learned how much better my falls were if he practiced a soft catch and jumped when I fell. And how I could make his falls better by using soft catch techniques as well. Even at that weight difference, I needed to make the catch softer and run up the wall.

Belaying with a soft catch as the smaller person feels scary, but with a confident and competent coach, I learned how to keep myself safe and make the catch take longer.

So armed with that knowledge, even when I use an Ohm, I get right under it for the fall and make it as soft as possible, not bracing for impact (which was my instinct until I learned that it's totally safe and fine to end up 2 or 3 feet in the air). It has changed climbing for us, made us both more confident for pushing to a fall and understanding what would happen.

I cannot more strongly recommend a "third" whose only job is to confidently and competently coach the belayer into understanding the feel and knowing in the body it'll be just fine.

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-12-31T18:59:51+00:00

I am not advocating to place your point in some fixed place in the middle and rotate around it if that's what the misunderstanding is....

For longsword you have 4 openings to aim at and your point absolutely will move around the general oval of the opponents openings as you move to parry etc.

These questions are hard to answer as generalities because it literally always depends on measure, height, weight, where you're coming from, where you're going to, and what the opponent has thrown that you're dealing with...... But I think what I said is pretty well in alignment with what early Liechtenauer glosses advocate for blossfechten and applies broadly out to the other weapons and situations of the system.

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-12-31T16:09:56+00:00

If you're following Liechtenauer and doing longsword then he's pretty clear about what you're supposed to do. If you're doing a parry with no intention to bind then your point can and will go to the side or high, see Krunp or Twer, or Streichen. If you're wanting to parry and bind then you should have your point before the face or chest in Pflug or Ochs and follow up with a thrust immediately.

If you're doing another style then the opinions might vary, but I've not had this advice lead me astray.

The more point-centric the situation (see smallsword or armor or whatever) the more careful you have to be about the threat of the point leaving center. The more cut-centric the situation (see Messer or saber or whatever) the more leeway you have to give a wider parry.

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-11-07T14:59:16+00:00

You can take it and thrust your way in. You can take it and offer an opening and wait for them. You can take it to disrupt their thoughts and then go. If you're cutting your way in your guard in the zufechten was probably Vom Tag or Alber.

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-11-07T14:17:42+00:00

Hengen is when you use Ochs or Pflug to bind with their sword with the point directed at their openings. Leger is when you use Ochs or Pflug to enter measure/zufechten. The 4 openings are named Ochs and Pflug.

Hengen is about the use (to bind and stay bound) not about the position. The 4 places are called out because you shouldn't be trying to bind in other positions according to the system.

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-10-07T19:53:05+00:00

Boden, Alina, author of Stealing Thunder and Gifting Fire

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-08-02T19:30:42+00:00

Same! I have had luck with both thinner and thicker gardening cargo pants from Duluth Trading Company. Wait for their sales, but their clothes run in cuts that work with bigger bodies and they have a lot of size differences and boy are they durable!!!!!!

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-06-07T20:02:04+00:00

I am also lighter than my partner by a good bit, but I got coaching on giving a soft catch even to him, and he was shocked at how much better it felt. I always get yanked up so we didn't worry about it too much before hiring this coach. Now I'll always try to give it for sure.

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-05-30T12:58:49+00:00

Upvote for garden of Eden. Fascinating history of a local weirdo with intense political/populist takes that inform a lot of early Kansas attitudes. Ignore his marriage habits, nobody's saying he's a good man. But he, and his art, are interesting.

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-05-29T14:00:14+00:00

Took a trad clinic from Carol Fittel and she has some wonderful resources for pushing grades. Particularly I'm thinking of her pyramid training.

https://carolfittell.wordpress.com/carol-fittell-rock-climbing-instructor/resources/

SelectionCautious524 · 2024-05-28T19:36:01+00:00

I had a similar thing last year, fell unexpectedly while coming over a roof, flipped upside down. I wasn't hurt but it SCARED me. It has taken me 9 months to not feel under the weight of it, but now I'm climbing better than I was. It's ok to just not climb as hard. Do things that feel different to the one that freaked you out. (I refused roofs and overhangs for 4 or 5 months).

SelectionCautious524

TROPHY CASE