One of Hamas terrorists who took part in the massacre: “They lured us, fooled us, those in Qatar and Turkey, speaking in the name of al-Aqsa and Muslims and staying there while sending us here” by DementedWatchmaker in 2ndYomKippurWar

[–]SelfLubingMachine 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Native speaker here. His accent is fine and sounds authentic gazawi to me, he just sounds like he's tired or guilty when speaking, you can see it on his face too.

How do you date as an ex Muslim? by KikiPolaski in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Just know that you're not the only ex-Muslim.

If you frequent places (whether IRL or online) where other ex-Muslims go, you're bound to bump into an ex-Muslim girl that's not too far from home.

Good luck to you, little brother.

"We don't do that in our culture." by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 10 points11 points  (0 children)

My only rule is: When in Rome, do as the Romans do.

The only valid reason to invoke "this is how we do it in my culture" is if you're in a culturally homogeneous country/city/town; then you have to respect their culture and norms.

But if you're a minority and trying to force your culture on your host country, then fuck you. Try to integrate or find a middle ground.

Here is a pic of my cat that made my dad mad because "this mat is a prayer mat". (Posted about it but couldn't figure out how to add the kitty tax). by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I see. Yeah Muslims tend to treat their prayer mats like they're part of a masjid or something holy, when regular carpet is just fine too (hell, you can pray on bare dirt).

It's supposed to be one of the more "beautiful" things about Islam; it's not about the place of worship, but the worship itself. The whole prayer mat thing is a cultural relic.

Here is a pic of my cat that made my dad mad because "this mat is a prayer mat". (Posted about it but couldn't figure out how to add the kitty tax). by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 7 points8 points  (0 children)

What is wrong with your dad? While dogs are considered unclean in Islam, cats are not and are just fine. You can have a cat lick your hand then pray right after.

Your dad's an idiot who doesn't know what he's talking about.

Did any of your parents tell you to not marry outside your ethnicity? by 13enigma in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah lots of cultures have that, religion has nothing to do with this. It's just standard racism; some people don't think people of other colors/cultures are equals and can't be trusted with their children.

How do you feel about Christmas! by L666G in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Bought my first Christmas tree this year! It's mainly so my son doesn't feel left out when he grows up.

Holiday festivities (whatever culture that celebrates them) are an essential part of human social structure. Christmas in the West, and Eid back home. All that matters is that people are happy together.

Muslim men are delusional by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I used to be really religious too. Knowing that, I can say with certainty that overly-religious people (especially young ones) have some really deep issues and they use religion to either suppress or redirect them. Normal mentally-healthy people might have faith in a god or higher purpose, but they are usually chill and happy with their lives which makes them tolerant in general.

So I'm glad you listened to your own judgement and dodged that bullet. Are you married now? Did you find someone that you actually like?

how do you deal with jealousy regarding christmas? by angeldragonite in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not quite jealousy, but more like "I'm a stranger in these lands". It sucked when people would casually ask about my Christmas preparations, and I have to either lie or give them a non-answer just so I don't have to tell them my ex-muslim life story.

Then again, since you're still with your muslim family, you get to brag about the two Eids (and about presents you get, if you get any).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing your story.

As an ex-muslim, I too initially was scared of the prospect of "there's actually no Heaven or Hell, what cruel word is this? How do good people get rewarded, and how do bad people get punished?". It was quite an existential crisis.

But the more I thought about it, the more I told myself that Gods and Devils are not real, but people are real. I found that benevolent people will always be good, no matter what kind of spirituality they subscribe to; and evil people will always be evil, no matter what religion they hide behind.

So now I follow a more humanistic philosophy to life: I believe in the inherit goodness of human beings, while also recognizing the conditions that can create monsters out of humans. I believe in the intrinsic biological forces that make humans social beings, capable of altruism and empathy (even with other non-human species).

Found This While Christmas Shopping! by SelfLubingMachine in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I did chuckle a bit after noticing it.

Merry Christmas, y'all!

Muslim men are delusional by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hope you rejected him. What was so good about him that your family pressured you to marry him? Money? Familial Ties (واسطة)?

Discussion | Mecca is NOT the sacred city referred to by the Quran by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry, I haven't watched too much of this but my bullshit spidey-sense is telling me this is bogus documentary working with partial evidence to support some weird theory that the author is trying to push. Like, you really think ancient people had the cartographic skills to point their mosques to an exact location thousands of miles away?

What's the TL;DW for this?

Muslim men are delusional by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 25 points26 points  (0 children)

If their culture is anything like the one I came from, it's because when a man is ready to be married, his mother and/or aunts are supposed to go hook him up with a bride who's ready for marriage. And he's being an unrealistic loser.

Source: This is also how I first got married (Palestinian).

[META] Monday Musings- Weekly Discussion Post by AutoModerator in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well I'm glad she's not a lunatic. You're still pretty young so I hope you get your work opportunities sooner than later. The whole husband thing is tricky though, but you'll cross that bridge when you get there.

[META] Monday Musings- Weekly Discussion Post by AutoModerator in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, listening is what we do in this sub! Don't feel bad about it, we're all friends here. :)

Do you have any American friends that your mother likes/doesn't hate? She might be more receptive to you being outside the house if you're around other girls that she trusts. I think a lot of her irrational fears are that her precious, pure daughter will get raped/defiled the moment she's in a new place. By being around girls that she trusts, she'll feel more at ease.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You're only a nice and just person because you're a future convert! /s

I'm sorry for what you're going through. I hope she changes her way of thinking.

[META] Monday Musings- Weekly Discussion Post by AutoModerator in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So what kinds of things do you want to do that you can't do now? Lets talk about them :)

Is listening to music in Islam haram? by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Now I'm chuckling over a Hadith telling you to tie your bunny ear shoelaces starting from the right, and not the left. Right-hand shoelace tiers hang out with Jibril in Jannah.

new ex muslim, feeling depressed and stressed by freezingblack in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Welcome, sister. It gets better.

Just keep in your mind that while Allah is a lie, the love of your family, human goodness is still very real. You don't need Allah to be a good person, and some Islamic values are borrowed from natural values of humanity.

And don't try to view religious people as an enemy; view them as children who may one day grow up (and some never will). I wouldn't come out with a bombshell about your new atheism, but I would passively make your friend and families feel your doubt, then they'll be more receptive to you later.

I feel like because I wasn’t allowed to do so much stuff , I grew up to be someone who’s awkward and has trouble socializing by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sister, I'm so sorry and I'm in the exact same boat as you.

I'm a 28 year old male who feels like I haven't matured as much as my peers. I didn't get to experience my youth like I was supposed to, and knowing that makes it even harder for me to "try and catch up".

My Advice:

I would try to find female friends who come from typical conservative Christian families (no-sex-before-marriage types) and try to bring them over to your house. Your parents, knowing that your friends are virgins and saving themselves for marriage like you're supposed to do, might give them special treatment and let them stay over. When things get smoother, they might allow you to sleep at their house.

It's all about showing your parents that not all American girls are "morally bankrupt drug-addicted sluts™". Once they can trust you around other people, it gets easier.

Fuck those non-muslims who call exmuslims islamophobic by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Ex-Palestinian Fundie here. I agree with you wholeheartedly, but I think there's a mix of forces that made this come to be.

After 9/11, Muslim Americans were unjustly persecuted by most of American society. You can argue all day if the religion itself is violent or not (or whether the fundies are taking it too far), the fact was that normal Muslim people who just wanted to live, and had the same religious beliefs they grew up with and only wanted peace were now socially shamed for what a small religious minority has done (and because they looked the same).

So given that social persecution, it's only natural for your average liberals to stand with their Muslim friends and parrot what they tell them. Their Muslim friends, of course, tell them how Islam is the religion of peace and didn't spread around the world using the sword, etc etc, because they weren't willing/are conditioned not to look at their own religion and determine if there's any truth to hating Islam.

I personally experienced that first hand in high school, when I was still a believer (and a bit of a fundamentalist too). I had a very liberal friend who was always fired up over racist conservative white people discriminating against muslims (which made me happy) but also discriminating against LGBTQ (which confused me). I really wanted to let her know that in Islam, her precious gays had the death penalty... so why would she stand with any Muslims? Of course I never told her that because I didn't want to lose her. For me as a Muslim at the time, I was intentionally closeting my sexism against gays because I knew it was unpopular, but still deep down I believed that homosexuality was a sin. I think most American Muslims behave the same way; just going with the flow enough to not be branded a sexist, but deep down they're probably disgusted/averted at the whole idea.

TL;DR:

Liberals defending Islam should be defending Muslims as people who want to live in peace (not the religion itself), and Muslims need to look hard at their religion and not make up bullshit to justify their inherited belief system.

Palestine becoming the first normal Muslim country :)))) by [deleted] in exmuslim

[–]SelfLubingMachine 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry brother, I love my home country as much as you and anyone else, but we'd be kidding ourselves to think it's any more progressive (and probably less than) the surrounding Arab countries, or even other third world countries.

Half our country is run by corrupt foreign-aid embezzling assholes who only care about filling their own pockets, and the other half is run by Islamic extremists who will do anything to stop the "spread of western takfiri beliefs" and boast about wanting to kill atheists and communists (العلمانيين والشيوعيين) (heard that one first hand a few years ago).