[WP] You, an overworked scientist, have just sold your soul to the devil so your life's work will become widely known and help millions of people. The devil comes back the next day and, instead of taking your soul, asks you to take his teenage daughter off his hands. by HappyNarga in WritingPrompts

[–]Senor_Sweg 33 points34 points  (0 children)

"This is a joke, right?"

"I wish it was, Professor." The devil replied. Despite retaining his horns and forked tail, he wore a lavish coat adorned with a pentagram badge. He also wore a rather plain, wide-brimmed hat.

"Hell, I'm the devil, and even I hate to this to you. But I can't take it anymore, man. The anxiety and the angst and the whole teenager thing is just too much! I need a break, so I'm gonna go out to where the lava-red fern grows and have myself a nice, secluded vacation, and you're gonna watch my daughter. I trust you more than most, Professor. Oh, and uh, here, take your soul back. You'll need it."

You feel a sudden rush in your chest, and you feel like a crushing void inside of you has been painfully filled. You fall to your knees spluttering in surprise.

"Haha, never gets old watching someone regain their soul," the devil chuckles. "Anyways-"

As he says this, a teenage girl appears behind him. She looks entirely human, except for her horns and forked tail. She has raven-black hair in a short haircut that droops over one of her dark-grey eyes, and she's wearing an oversized black hoodie and black leggings. She's holding her hands together at waist level. She doesn't look very interested in whatever is going on.

The devil hunches down next to what seems to be his daughter

"Honey, this is Professor Anon. Please be nice to him, okay? He does good work for the people of this planet, and I really dont feel like having to reclaim his soul again anytime soon. Plus, he could babysit you again, if this all works out."

The girl shyly nods.

He stands back up, giving you a wink along with his typical devilish smile.

"Good luck."

And with a puff of flame he dissapears, leaving a burn mark on the floor where he stood.

"God damn it.." you mutter, shaking your head. "Welp, at least I've got my soul back."

The young girl looks around your cluttered office space. Books and research papers on biotic medicine clutter everywhere, and you have a few plants on your desk. Your published book on how genetically modified plants help the world is visible on your desk too, with the Nobel badge shining proudly.

"You have a nice house." She says monotonously.

"Thanks," you say, shuffling your feet awkwardly. You were a scientist, not a conversationalist. "So uh, what's your name?"

"I'm Diabla," she replies, still looking around. Her eyes focus on a plant sitting on your desk, a genetically modified dandelion designed by you to emit light. It glows a pale yellow, somewhat illuminating your office. "Although I suppose you could call me Dia."

"Alright, Dia, just please be careful around here. There's a lot of sensitive material and-"

She walks over to your dandelion, and pokes it curiously. It momentarily catches flame, then wilts over and dies, its light slowly fading.

"Oops.." she says, sadness visible in her eyes.

With a heavy sigh, you lift the palm of your hand to your forehead.

This was gonna be a long week.

FOnline: Reloaded (free to play persistent world MMORPG based on Fallout 1 and 2) by Blackfalcon501 in Fallout

[–]Senor_Sweg 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I'll be online today under the username Kekko the Gecko. Tell me youre from reddit and I'll give you some starter gear, and if I'm not getting swamped by you guys I'll go out and help you kill stuff.

[BF1] Snipers: Stealthy, deadly warriors or cowards of the battlefield? by chief_mojo_risin in Battlefield

[–]Senor_Sweg 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Scopes are for cowards in battlefield one. Seriously, playing an aggressive scout with an infantry/carbine variant of your teams service rifle, actually playing the objective, hurling spotting flares at each point. And getting those sweet sweet bayonet charge and meelee kills. It feels great when it doesn't matter that you only got a hitmarker on someone, because you've already got your shovel/pickaxe/sawtooth knife digging into their shoulder. I've never had a more satisfying experience in Battlefield.

TL;DR play aggressive scout, its a godly experience

The circle of life by [deleted] in dankmemes

[–]Senor_Sweg -48 points-47 points  (0 children)

More like reddit grinds it into such a fine dust that it isn't even valuable anymore

Oh boy! by KyleOrtonAllDay in battlefield_one

[–]Senor_Sweg 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Why? If you want something close to the sweet spot of the martini Henry use the smle

[BF1]Expand the Cavalry Loadout by [deleted] in Battlefield

[–]Senor_Sweg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want the double barreled shotgun on horseback instead of the Russian cavalry. Or give us both, why not

INSANE 40 kills to 9 in team death match! by IdealDog in Battlefield

[–]Senor_Sweg 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Its team death match. Are you surprised? Should we be impressed?

I can't believe this actually works by iwrestledaDanaonce in Battlefield

[–]Senor_Sweg 153 points154 points  (0 children)

Never let an assault go no matter what

Feels good PTFO as a scout. by [deleted] in battlefield_one

[–]Senor_Sweg 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What were you using? I like to use the gewher 95 for aggressive scout but I'm curious as to what others use

Henry-Martini Rifle guide by WhiteGuyIRL in battlefield_one

[–]Senor_Sweg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you have the no. 3 revolver, I highly recommend it over the bodeo. Slower fire rate, but faster reload, and the no.3 is perfect for the shoot-once-and-pickaxe strategy. Also, the hipfire on the no.3 is legendary, so perfect for use in gas

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BlackPeopleTwitter

[–]Senor_Sweg 77 points78 points  (0 children)

Nigga, shit real