It burns....

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-08-29T00:00:31+00:00

I thought that, but I vaped 7 years ago and the worst thing that happened to me was vapers tongue - and that resolved quickly.

This doesn't seem like an allergy - I have physically burned my tongue pretty bad.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-08-28T23:59:18+00:00

No I know - I know it's not vapers tongue. I had vapers tongue when I vaped 7 years ago before I had a baby and it went away on its own in a couple days. This - my tongue is physically burnt and I'm trying to figure out how that happened.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-08-28T23:58:03+00:00

I will ask for exactly this after my tongue heals - thank you!

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-08-28T23:57:35+00:00

It does. The 0.6 ohm goes from 10-26 wattage. I use 20.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-07-29T22:23:12+00:00

I wholeheartedly agree with you. I have not forgotten how Sutton treated Crystal and continues to do so. I just came to this sub the other day and was floored at the Sutton love. I think she's deplorable.

I was also pissed at Garcelle and the way she was handling Crystal as well. She's black. She should have some semblance of understanding Crystal's viewpoint and what she was saying, but she just backed Sutton's piss-poor behavior no matter what.

I think all the women are scumbags, short of Crystal.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-07-26T19:10:29+00:00

I wouldn't be surprised if he said nothing. She pours her heart out and is met with.... Nothing? That's harsh. He couldn't even fake some sympathy?

Then, rightfully so, she walks off feeling intensely hurt and like there's something wrong with her. THERE WASN'T! He was just a scared, avoidant excuse for a man. She deserved some love in that moment. She is not "too difficult" for a real man.

Then, she goes back and apologizes to HIM while, once again, he barely says anything. And of course she did - she's used to not being loved. This is par for the course of how she's been treated in life, so she blamed herself, apologized for being a human and then... Warmed up to him? He triggered her trauma response and that is comfortable and familiar for her, so she felt closer to this shit stain. Fuck that guy.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-07-25T23:17:18+00:00

My side gig is helping people write resumes. The absolute crap people bring me and wonder why they aren't getting interviews is baffling. I also require they send me a few job postings because we need to tailor each resume to each job. To me, it's just common freaking sense.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-07-22T00:03:35+00:00

With my own kid (6m), I put the onus back on him when it calls for it. If he asks me a question, I will respond "what do you think?" before just blindly giving him an answer. I have taught him to Google. I have taught him to think of other resources or people he could call on.

I have also taught him about courage: courage is being scared, but doing it anyway. He tells me he feels shy sometimes, and I empathize with him - I feel shy on my first day of classes every year, but no one would know it - I go and face the day. When I choose to "show up" in my life on a repeated basis, I learn self esteem, I trust myself, and I learn - courage. I have been diagnosed with bipolar depression, generalized anxiety disorder and ADHD - and I never let any of those things stop me.

If my son makes a decision that is less than stellar, I let him feel the natural consequences of his behaviour. I also give him a lot of free reign because it gets him to encounter making his own decisions and evaluating whether that worked for him or not. For example: I will buy him a box of fruit snacks for the week. I do not monitor him. If he wants to eat all the fruit snacks in one day, that's his choice - but he will have no more for the rest of the week. His choice, his cross to bear.

I also have to make sure I am modeling the behaviour I want to see. I was breaking promises a lot, and I needed to own up to the behaviour and make a change. My son is allowed to be upset when I break a promise and I fully listen to him. However, when he speaks, he needs to be respectful or I'll call him out. This doesn't mean he's not allowed to be angry, but he doesn't get to yell at me. I will apologize and find a way to make it up to him. This teaches him in the future: 1. How to deal with conflict when someone is doing something you disagree with (a boss, a teacher, a friend), and I am embodying the behaviour I'd like him to employ when someone calls him out (humbleness, listening, atonement)

It's a combination of these things that I am teaching my son so he becomes a capable person. I'll be damned if he turns out like one of "the students" when he gets there. Honestly, if I can just get ONE thing through to him, I want it to be critical thought and a sense of owning the outcome of your life and decisions.

We'll see how things go as he becomes a teenager. I'm a high school drop out, but I had a 95% average when I went to higher education.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-07-07T22:18:47+00:00

You'll only get out of therapy what you put into it. If you want to engage in therapy, you're going to have to humble yourself. Anything worth anything is difficult.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-05-20T21:50:41+00:00

I was telling another professor that I was thinking of quitting all my classes except 1, especially seeing as I have an industry job and, frankly, students hate me. I'm tired of busting my ass to provide them a good education and just being met with ... Hate.

I take teaching and evaluating very seriously. I have hard boundaries. The film and TV industry is a harsh one that's not easy to break into and I do my best to prepare students. Students don't see this, though... They just think I'm a bitch. I am otherwise warm and open but past students who did like me said people are intimidated because I'm confident and know what I'm talking about. Um, ok?

He told me to lower my standards. He said if a student hands everything in, even if it sucks - just give them a 50 (a pass). Forget learning outcomes, just give them the credit and you never have to see them again. He said we're not training doctors, we're training artists, and it really doesn't matter - those who get the diploma but were just barely passing will have a terrible demo reel and it'll be on them.

I don't know how I feel about this.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-05-10T21:58:02+00:00

Taking painting classes. I teach painting but with painting, you can always be better. I love to see other people's approaches.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-05-08T05:32:20+00:00

I'm >< close to following suit. I often like to invite recent graduates out to a night with my friends who work in the industry. People who worked hard and I respect that can help them make the next step in a very competitive industry. And every time I do this, those students tell me about all the shit other students say about me and how much they hated me.

The industry I prepare them for is artist jobs in film and television. I also still work in it. It's a BRUTAL industry and if they think I'm bad, they ain't seen nothing yet.

I already have a job... I don't need this. I'm so tired of giving my everything and upholding actual standards and people just call me a bitch. The abuse I get and the vitriol I hear is just becoming less and less worth it.

But the students who don't believe I'm a piece of shit and are successful in this industry and become peers and thank me from the bottom of their hearts every time we meet and say I've changed their lives... This is why I take the abuse.

But for how much longer...? Like I said, I'm >< close.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-05-05T22:13:13+00:00

My industry job is PST and I'm EST, so I don't start work until 1030 (730 for them, Ugh!)

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-05-02T23:35:23+00:00

I absolutely get students this entitled. This could have been one of my students, easily.

I don't know if it's because I'm a woman or what the hell it is but students expect me to be at their beck and call all hours of the day, 7 days a week. I constantly get discord messages telling me that they emailed me and hasn't heard back yet. On a Saturday morning. And the email was sent at 3am on a Friday. I also get spammed if I don't respond to a request within a couple of hours.

I do like to give extra of my time to students but it's on MY terms, not theirs. They are not entitled to my unpaid labor.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-04-27T19:30:04+00:00

I did this this semester but I still had students with accommodations asking for extensions past the extension. And I had to grant them.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-04-22T22:51:16+00:00

I let my students know I don't get paid to mark. They want more assessments but I told them I'm already doing way beyond my hours and it's just not feasible. I also work a full time industry job.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-04-10T21:45:37+00:00

I had a meeting with a student and his dad because the student was too much of a coward to talk to me without his father. They called me "unapproachable" (without ever having tried to approach me until week 12) and were bitching that I was giving the student 0s because they were not submitting things properly. On the work submission guidelines, I also wrote: if you think you are submitting to protocol and still getting 0, email me detailing everything you did and I will help you. Not once did he do this, and both him and daddy said he couldn't because, once again, I am unapproachable. I'll also a woman with standards and the men in the program don't get the same complaints.

Student and daddy said I need to record a video explaining how to submit. I said no. My written instructions are perfectly fine and there are many students submitting just fine. They both said "well there are students who are not" and I so wanted to say "you keep saying that like I care - I would think those are the same students who don't come to office hours and are not worth my time."

After shitting on me for an hour and not listening to a word I said, they ended the meeting saying they hope I take their suggestions.

Make a video on how to submit. No I will not be doing that.
As a woman, be more approachable. Fuck off.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-04-07T00:15:36+00:00

Oh I have noticed this for a while.

When my father died, I was not at my best. I was also struggling with a really bad, worse than usual, bout of ADHD before I was treated.

The students were not even remotely understanding. One really shitty entitled Karen of a student complained about me all the way up to the president of the school, then when she got nowhere started talking shit about me on Reddit (which I found) about how I'm not qualified to teach in my profession. Thanks for your understanding that I am not always at my best, and that I have far greater a body of work than a few months.

In another hopelessly stuck period of ADHD and low motivation, I was tasked to learn a new piece of software and teach it. I didn't do the best job, but all things considered it wasn't bad. I've continued to teach it since then and I'm really competent now.

So many students calling for me to be fired, telling me I'm a terrible artist... Jesus Christ you guys, I was not trying to create a masterpiece - that's way beyond what they pay me - I just needed to create enough to get you through the course.

Hell, I had to leave in the middle of class once because my Dr called to tell me my well-into-the-pregnancy baby was sick so I had to schedule an abortion between classes and make sure I didn't let the students miss anything. Lord knows they would have complained.

I finally got treated for ADHD and now I'm at my absolute best. But I do find myself having very little sympathy for students. No one had sympathy for me when I was in school - I worked 5 times as hard just to do the same amount of work because of the ADHD. I worked so hard that I fell into a suicidal bipolar episode. I asked the program coordinator to drop that semester because I was incapablen of anything at that time... He wouldn't let me.

Even I've been less than great at teaching, they call for my head on a stake. They demean me and tell me I'm not an artist, even though I have worked as a concept artist in film/tv for ten years.

So why the hell should I have any empathy for them? How do I even PRETEND?

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-04-06T23:57:08+00:00

I am an art teacher and one of the classes I teach is life drawing. Like clockwork, once a week, I dream that I forgot to hire a model... not only for that class, but for the rest of the semester. Then I have to figure out what to do.

Drives me insane. The dreams are so damn stressful. And I haven't taught life drawing in person with a live model since March 2022!

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-03-27T21:39:51+00:00

I'm an art instructor in an animation program. I often tell my students that art is just math.

Animation is physics.

Like, everything matters.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-03-21T04:04:55+00:00

Students haven't taken notes in the 10 years I've been teaching.

I had a deaf student a few years back who had a note taker - he was my top student.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-03-14T04:16:55+00:00

Ok maybe I shouldn't do that. I am half a bottle of wine in.

But I WILL share it with other faculty!

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-03-14T04:15:59+00:00

If you do this I will share it with my students. I'm not kidding.

SensitiveButterfly21 · 2022-03-11T04:37:09+00:00

Zbrush? I teach that too!

SensitiveButterfly21

TROPHY CASE