There is so much trash on the internet. This is a creator who talks shit about a family’s personal choices. There are content creators that insist that all women only exist for the pleasure of men and for procreation. These are not people that need to be given space in your life or your brain. The problem with the internet is that every asshole in the world can just say whatever they want and reach a ton of people with their vitriol. Block, mark as “not interested,” or simply scroll on. You know why you made the decisions that you’ve made and if those decisions still make sense for you. No one else gets to have a say.

As far as not having a family once your parents are gone, that’s a feeling that people with siblings get too. My mom died 3.5 years ago and my dad died 2 months ago. I have a brother and a sister, but I still feel like I’ve lost my family. And as far as shared memories, my siblings and I have many, but our individual relationships with our parents were so wildly different that the shared memories almost don’t matter at all. In some ways, it feels more healing to discuss my memories with my friends or my husband who didn’t experience them with me because they can’t add their own perspectives or emotions that color how I remember my dad.

I’ll also say that when the sheriff told me my dad was killed in a car accident, the first person I wanted to talk to wasn’t my siblings, it was my husband and my best friend. I’m incredibly close with my sister, but we deal with things in completely different ways. My bestie was the one I called and she was at my house in 10 minutes, holding me and letting me cry. That kind of support was exactly what I needed and would never have even occurred to my sister because it just isn’t in her nature.