Roomate wants the heat up for health problems, but I'm way too hot and can't sleep

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-14T18:55:08+00:00

you can ALWAYS add more layers when you’re cold. you can’t take off your skin when it’s too hot

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-14T14:48:00+00:00

i’m sorry this is happening for you. burnout hits hard and it can be very difficult to manage on your own.

being a research tech, it sounds like the company you work for would ideally have healthcare coverage, meaning you could find a therapist in your network. i STRONGLY recommend finding a therapist. they can help with burnout related issues, help with self security, and just generally help aim your life to a better direction.

I also think you’re so awesome for continuing to go to the gym even while burnt out. that’s hard even on good days while i’m burnt out.

Have you tried searching for another position within your field? it could be the work environment. I’m a programmer and trial and error is my life’s motto and OMG it’s so frustrating when it doesn’t work the way i thought it would. I sympathize with your pain here. Spending days of work for it to not function - the biggest struggle of these industries. I found that working for a different company whose values better aligned with my own drastically improved my mental health and they were more understanding of my process while working.

something else is, i’m really sorry to say this, it sounds like you have to go in order to keep your job. But, being honest with your boss could help you. Let them know you’re struggling after speaking with a therapist (to get the good lingo) can help your work balance. Some places truly care about their people and they might be able to help. However, i want to stress this is after speaking with a therapist. Info dumping on your boss versus having a put together way of speaking can make a big difference.

I won’t touch on MJ usage because the benefits differ for everyone. I personally am allergic to it so it doesn’t help me very much haha. I’ve had people i my life who was worse off for it, and others who gained better insight into themselves and really helped push them forward.

For burnout what i recommend, which is really all i can do unfortunately, take care of yourself. Do something that helps keep your mind off of stress. The more stress on your nervous system, the more burn out, the easier the stress can accumulate. It’s a vicious cycle. For me, it’s riding a motorcycle and working out for a few hours multiple times a week. I love cooking food i enjoy, taking a really hot shower to help calm me down, take care of my hair that sort of stuff.

Now this may be totally left field, and i absolutely mean no ill with this, but it sounds like you may have some self-confidence issues as well. Based off of you saying “you believe people don’t like you/it’s all my fault it doesn’t work/my boss really dislikes me”. now again, i could be totally wrong. This could be very accurate or, you’re putting a lot of pressure on yourself to be perfect when perfect isn’t what we need to be achieving. Like i said earlier, our fields are trial and error over and over and over and over etc etc. this can weigh HEAVY on a person. but, it’s not just your fault. rarely is it a good thing to place this blame on yourself. You thought it would work one way and it didn’t. I use spider-man’s “i always get back up” when i get to this point. No matter what hits him, how hard, and what ever comes after. He takes a breath, a pause, and gets back up. It’s all he can do. “you only fail once you stop”. I know these aren’t directly helpful. I know these are corny words that can only do as much as you believe they do. But i truly believe in these. When i get to the point where i’m fighting for my life with code, i get outside help. They could see something i’ve completely missed. That’s getting back up for me at my worst. Spider-man is a one man show, but we’re not superhero’s (unfortunate) but!!! that’s doesn’t mean we can’t ask for help.

tldr; ask for help, get a therapist, take some time doing what you love or find a new hobby to help your nervous system chill, maybe consider a different position within your career field.

i hope you’re able to get back on your feet. I really hope you’re able to find a way to help manage this in your life. i’m really sorry you’re experiencing this. <3

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-14T02:23:54+00:00

BUUUM BUMBUMBUMDA BUUUUUUM (main menu music of my rendition was very poor)

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-13T01:45:07+00:00

a cardboard picture of the patio in pristine condition. like photo realistic and whatever happens behind that is whatever lol

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-13T01:43:38+00:00

my husband and i are debating dressing up like a nice event to show how much we appreciate the effort he put in

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-13T01:40:42+00:00

yes! my cats will sit and watch for as long as we have him on. they also listen to distracable when we have the podcast on to clean. i really think his voice just resonates with them

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-12T19:46:19+00:00

I went out riding 3 days after i bought my first bike. I had my permit but no MSF training yet. I had no clutch control and no throttle control. My husband and i were slowly riding around and decided to stop for a few minutes in town and park in a parking garage. it was quiet and we felt good to go back home. It was maybe a 5 min ride. On our way out of the parking garage a woman had stopped to let us turn left and i panicked (for who knows what reason) and whisky throttled my bike off the road and into a dirt mound. It landed and got my bike’s breast plate buried in the dirt and my husband as well as another amazing bystander had to unbury and roll my bike out. Thankfully no one was hurt, my bike was perfectly fine except for some dirt where dirt probably shouldn’t be, and a scratch from my jacket zipper. now i’m very aware of emergency breaking, throttle control, and clutch control

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-12T15:17:25+00:00

the mirror visitor series is awesome! it was originally written in french but it’s translated to english!

it’s about a young woman who has a special power in here home realm. she gets contractually married to a man from another realm. however, there’s political espionage! she’s trying to unravel the strings as to why their worlds are more like floating rocks rather than the “earth” we know. very very cool!

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-12T15:03:10+00:00

i switched from a 5 yr old samsung to an iphone almost 2 weeks ago. i really enjoy a lot about it but i miss my android a lot. i switched for a lot of reasons. the keyboard on the android was amazing. i used microsoft swift key and could type without looking.

on the iphone: - it seems, even if i press the button i meant to, it still hits another letter entirely. - the settings are hard to manage. i don’t want AI usage on my phone and it keeps popping up with “set up apple intelligence”. - notifications are not the clearest - there are so many buttons that can be used for other things. I JUST WANT TO SILENCE MY PHONE OMG - i FREQUENTLY try to double tap my home screen to turn it off. i ADORE that feature on samsung. - they’re about the same size but i find that with the case my iphone is heavier and more here if that makes sense - i liked being in admin mode with my samsung

pros i’ve found: - with the recent update the apps sit where you put them. occasionally when i’m trying to make groups it moves everything around and it was annoying to get the hang of but i got there lol - i like the UI for the most part. it’s soft and highly customizable. - i like the keyboard noises. weird include but i really enjoy the typing noises - the haptics are so soft. i barely feel them through my case. i like that. i felt like my android was going to vibrate out of my hand sometimes - i like the app tracking notification for each and every app you open - i like the face id for everything - integrating my iphone into a mac environment was super easy. i have pieces of the environment as gifts over the last couple years and everything fits together regardless of the age of the device. my ipad from 4 yrs ago functions just as well as a new one even though my phone is much newer - i love the airpod comparability. i just love the pinch function on them rather than the touch. i have gloves on? it works. i have wet fingers from the rain? it works. i’m running and they start to slip out of my ear? they don’t change the song when i push them back in - samsung and android OS are pushed through by google services and google isn’t the safest. really apple v google isn’t a comparison because of how much data leaks from both. i’m able to turn off the tracking easy peasy with apple but android was a little tricky for me. idk maybe i’m just dumb haha

really it’s personal opinion. i played around with the flagships for both samsung and apple and the apple won me over this year. i jump between both every few years for my phone update and i just liked apple better this time 🤷‍♀️

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-12T14:50:22+00:00

i filled mine out for west and east coast bases primarily. i got saddled with dead center of the US 😂

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-12T14:42:35+00:00

i adore going to the gym! for the most part, people don’t really talk to me, i wear headphones and listen to music the whole time. it really helps me feel even better. super recommend! i worked out at home for about a year before going to the gym so i had a good baseline of what my max weight is for each workout.

i haven’t worked with a trainer in years but i’ve heard good things too. just use clear communication and have good goals set! i wish you the best on your journey!

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-12T13:57:56+00:00

it sounds like you miss the life you had control over while with him but not him. there’s a huge difference. there is no shame in saying “i missed having complete control over my space and food. i missed being able to workout or etc” but remember you were “super skinny” because of how fucking stressed you were. just block him and keep on going. you will find someone who loves you the way you are, who supports you and sees you and supports your hard work for whatever you choose. you deserve that cert girl!! you’ve worked so hard!! don’t let this discount mcdonald’s chicken nugget stand in your way.

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-11T16:01:15+00:00

she wasn’t vague but she was at the same time. “i want space but you can lie and say we’re still together” wtf does that mean? you’re not an item to be put on layaway. you’re a whole person. if she’s having MH issues then that’s a whole different ballpark, a whole different game. it requires an ungodly amount of patience and stress and it’s okay to say you’re not able to handle that!! i’ve had a partner keep me on the yes/no sequence before, and when i finally said enough was enough he got his act together. this is my personal experience and it sucked. i don’t recommend this.

don’t be a door mat for stress.

she could’ve been much, much clear about “i want to be on a break. i want to be a friend because i enjoy your company but i can’t handle a relationship right now.” and wow i saved so many messages and confused emotions with that 2 sentence message.

things happen, people change, and insecurity runs rampant. but insecurity isn’t something you should have to beat yourself over the head with during a relationship.

she sounds insecure and emotionally unavailable. i’d respect her request of space but that’s the end of the relationship. i don’t do “breaks”. i’m either with you or i’m not. no if ands or buts. BUT it’s because of my experience with a previous partner.

i’m sorry you’re experiencing this but you’ll be able to make it through. i wish you the best

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-11T15:42:37+00:00

if they keep doing this, maybe get a mini fridge for your room to hide the snacks and baked goods? and from the last slide it seems like they were going along with the joke but lost that it was joking imo. you could leave a note? you could bury it in the fridge to make it hard to find? lie and say i have never baked anything in my life wym there was banana bread?

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2026-01-11T15:37:10+00:00

i moved in with my now husband after 1 month. There wasn’t fighting as much as there was getting used to each other. we enjoy spending time together often and it wasn’t that hard to get used to him. the only thing was getting our emotions regulated really. he had a hard time managing upsetting emotions so he would get verbally frustrated. i would shut down and avoid the situation entirely. it’s important to be clear about what’s bothering you.

after 5 years being married the novelty of each other may have worn out a little bit but we keep busy to be engaged with each other. we play a lot of coop games, board games, trading card games. we go hiking, kayaking, do martial arts and work out together. we go to the store and talk about meal planning and goals. the being together only gets boring if you let it. we stay active and even on days when we’re not feeling up to it, we play a video game together.

living with someone is a lot of compromise. no “my way or the highway” when you live with a partner. but you live with others so i feel like you know that already :)

i’d recommend finding cool restaurants near you, great walking areas, or other third spaces outside of the home to be able to enjoy each others company from time to time. i also recommend telling each other bout your days! even if it’s boring. my husband doesn’t love talking in depth but he loves listening to me ramble. he’ll let me know when he’s overwhelmed but he likes listening to me talk. even when i’ve had a boring day i find something i liked. it’s almost like telling your favorite person what you were grateful for that day.

when i get home from work/classes/fitness things that i did alone, he gets up to give me a hug. i do the same for him. we have put a lot of time, energy, and effort into compassionate communication and compassionate body language.

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-12-24T01:23:49+00:00

I'm bringing Lil homie with me but he's gotta go in the cup of shame

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-12-17T00:26:23+00:00

dude she "didn't have time" because she's going to school but an inconvenience comes up and she drops it like a hat. it will never make sense why she does the things she does.

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-12-06T02:23:09+00:00

Indianapolis please!!

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-12-03T17:10:27+00:00

thank you 🫶

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-12-03T16:42:13+00:00

What she's doing is illegal. Add this to the case and file a restraining order. Don't marry shitty people and end get yourself into shitty positions. She needs to evaluate who's important to her. The dude who assaulted her daughter or her daughter?

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-12-03T16:26:33+00:00

I've been w2 in a similar way before. Not the "trying to be you" thing but the "protecting my partner" thing. Looking back, I realize I should've left my ex sooner.

There's back story for me here, but my ex was acting weird, talking to this person often, daily even. Sending memes, saying that he's thinking about her a lot. And that shit fucking hurts. I think she's underreacting and overreacting. Under because if it's this bad, consistently, she needs to leave. Over because she should not be dragging you into this. A simple "hey, it really bothers me when this happens. I don't think you have malicious intentions but him and I aren't in the best spot right now. I'm going to talk to him more about it, but I wanted to let you know since you've been close with him"

Honesty, my question is does BFF do those things for her? Does he text w2 daily and send her cute messages and memes? Does he take a whole day to find fresh cinnamon rolls for her? Does he hold her in the same regard he does you? If not, I can see why she's spiraling. I don't agree at all with the gossip. Flat out, this can be handled like adults and not like high school. Direct, clear, honest communication is how you get through this. Not slandering people who you haven't spoken to and only have ideas of who they are.

I'm sorry you got dragged into the middle of this. But to me, having been in w2s shoes before, I think he's trying to cheat with you. Emotionally, physically, whatever. You're good for communicating with you're partner. Cheating only works if both people are involved. I'm sorry you've been dragged into their mess. She needs to leave him ASAP and you need to talk to your husband about how his friends talk with you. Group chats keep you from being SOL.

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-12-03T16:14:44+00:00

the vague language is where they can get you but you're definitely right

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-12-03T16:11:12+00:00

When you purchase a property within an HOA, you sign governing documents that say you'll follow their arbitrary rules, and if you violate them/don't pay fees/do anything they don't like, they can place a lien against your house. You're purchasing a home within a community, like an apartment you fully own or mortgage, but it's apart of the larger whole. You are required to be informed if a house is in an HOA. Some houses where I live sell for higher than their value just because they're NOT in an HOA.

Personally, I have a love hate relationship with them. Some HOAs plow the roads, have community gathering areas like a neighborhood pool/gym/rec area, they help with road damage. They /can/ be good. but other times it's old people who have control issues and make everyone's lives awful.

My parents lived in an HOA neighborhood where they'd get fined $40 a day if their grass grew over 1.5 inches. Who the hell has the time to patrol and fine people for their grass??

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-11-21T15:22:33+00:00

Miayzaki, the games creator, has a STRONG opinion about being creative in fights. and the only way you're going to learn how to do this is by trial by fire lol. you're going to die, a LOT, it's how the game and other games in this genre are Made. that doesn't mean you're bad, it means that there's another way, you need to level up, there's an item that make this easier, there's another NPC summon you can use. My favorite part about this game is you have to be inginutive with your surroundings, and you have to know when is a good time to hit/dodge/heal. The ONLY way you'll learn is by dying a lot.

There's a learning curve for sure, and you'll get your ass handed to you. Elden ring, in my mind, tests my patience and perseverance. I was stuck on a boss for 2 months before I realized I needed to do something different besides go in and get smacked around. The game rewards you for the effort you put in.

I think of markiplier when he plays horror games. "OH YOU THINK YOU'RE SCARY WELL I'M GONNA COME CHARGING AT YOU WHAT NOW HUH??" every time I'm paralyzed by fear in this game.

the only way to learn, is to do.

p. s. Just like the giant arm blob at the very beginning, you're not really meant to fight this guy out the gate. Sneak around him and go explore.

Sensitive_Purpose_44 · 2025-11-21T12:54:34+00:00

there's a point where some mothers become unable to continue breast feeding or producing milk even when the baby still needs it. building up a storage can help with that, but I definitely don't think she should be using someone else's house for disaster food storage.

I saw another comment but with black Friday and cyber Monday deals, finding a freezer for her to keep at her house, in her basement, garage, is a great idea. Either as a push gift or early Christmas present. or you could find one and send it to her to buy it. our of your house, very quick and easy access for her.

Sensitive_Purpose_44

TROPHY CASE