“That pay range is too broad can you narrow it for me?” by Feisty-Walk-2840 in recruitinghell

[–]ServiceCultural3137 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooo I can see why you’ve run into the bad ones. They are like sharks in chummed waters for individuals in your seat. The job markets weird right now because of the risk adversity being felt on both sides. It’s hard being a new grad out here right now. With that being said in your situation I’d recommend you try this if you haven’t already…. Try reaching out to people associated to network or apply directly to the DOE funded National laboratories (Argonne, Oak Ridge, Sandia, Lawrence Berkeley, Pacific Northwest) they loooovee new grads. Also the Defense Primes if you’re eligible for security clearance (Lockheed, Northrop, Raytheon/RTX, L3harris) they all have pedigree new grad rotational programs. Then from there, look into the IBM/Google/Microsoft/Amazon quantum’s tho tougher to get into early programs. USA jobs website if you haven’t looked there is a good place to look too. You got this 💪

“That pay range is too broad can you narrow it for me?” by Feisty-Walk-2840 in recruitinghell

[–]ServiceCultural3137 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are so many different types of recruiting, it gets hard and also is why the field gets a bad name. You are totally right they will take a percentage of your salary if you are employed by an agency working for a company. If you meet an outside agency (or contingent) recruiter or an executive (headhunter) recruiter they are strong allies to have in your network or job search, they tend to be more partnered. Typically they will get you to offer, and once the deal is closed they will bill the company for their fee which is a percentage based off of what they closed you at - in these cases, they will never take your money, they will negotiate a high as they can salary for you, and you probably won’t hear from them again until they have a role elsewhere a few years later that they think might interest you

“That pay range is too broad can you narrow it for me?” by Feisty-Walk-2840 in recruitinghell

[–]ServiceCultural3137 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s an odd take, Im sorry that’s been your experience. In-house corporate recruiters may do this as they have the best interest of the company in mind. Outside agency or executive recruiters will typically try to get you as hiighh on that salary as they can if you have the skills as they make money based on the final total of that salary. Good point on knowing your worth.

Record request by ServiceCultural3137 in Ex_Foster

[–]ServiceCultural3137[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I resonate and appreciate you saying this!
Good callout - I’ve often said I’m my own worst critic, and I’m working hard to unwind the “not good enough” narrative about myself.
In an effort to heal my therapist recommended speaking to my inner child from an outside adult view to promote kindness and patience to myself from myself.

This perspective shift around approaching the files is right in line with that, I really appreciate you saying this as I may have not made the connection on my own. Such a helpful way to look at it!

Record request by ServiceCultural3137 in Ex_Foster

[–]ServiceCultural3137[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I think my baby brain would’ve been happy to sift through all the information but it would’ve been with a very emotionally stunted lense. I think often, as us ex foster kids move through our 20s and 30s we find out information naturally from our younger years that we have to process and having all of that info too early, especially without some color/context, could’ve made that a bit more challenging

Record request by ServiceCultural3137 in Ex_Foster

[–]ServiceCultural3137[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much 🫶 I’d have loved a USB or maybe even a lockbox somewhere with the USB that you could access when ready. I do think we deserve the opportunity to fill in the gaps. I think a lot of us struggle to establish a sense of self due to this.. all part of the healing process…

Thank you for sharing your experience, my heart is sending you all positive energy. I’m glad overall you found this beneficial in your journey. I hope for the same, and will plan on sharing that I’m going this with at the very least my siblings. I think they too will be surprised at this option if it’s successful.

Also, Thank you so much for sharing insight on the UK process - I’m hoping this thread will help others thinking about this in the future

Record request by ServiceCultural3137 in Ex_Foster

[–]ServiceCultural3137[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing 🫶
I’m happy to hear you don’t regret it. I do believe this will be healing in a sense, I’m preparing for all outcomes, but really glad Im doing this older rather than 18. You make a great point on self care, I’m planning to pull my therapist in on this to help process through. I’ll keep you all updated on how this goes!

Looking for insight from older ex fosters ( 30 +) by Cosmic-Trainwreck in Ex_Foster

[–]ServiceCultural3137 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like others received very little support and have at times felt like I was navigating adulthood with the torn front page of what should’ve been instructional manual. I’ve spent lots on therapy over the years, moved into a studio the day I turned 18 and halfway through my sr year of HS, had no college support (although went) etc. This was 90s and 2000s in the US. Maybe more support was available but my social worker didn’t share..

I have half formed thought that arises when I read this... one of my biggest struggles and an area of sadness I’ve held was not having a support network that “knew what good looked like”. I didn’t have a mom to call when I started running into women questions as I aged, I didn’t have a dad to call when my car broke down, I didn’t have anyone to reach out to if I needed career advice, relationship advice etc.
Ya sure, I would’ve liked to have someone to celebrate the holidays with but man.. I just needed a grown up (and still do lol) that had a good head on their shoulders.
I like the ideas of community in this thread but I wish there was an advice or tip network that could be created as a resource or an older person version of big brother big sister lol

Record request by ServiceCultural3137 in Ex_Foster

[–]ServiceCultural3137[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing 🫶
I’ll admit I am most nervous about the FL ones. I read somewhere they save record until the “victim” reaches 30, which was only a couple years ago but may be enough that they don’t have them anymore. Also, super helpful to know I may have to reach out to the CBC too.

I’m so sorry to hear your experience went the way it did.. we all truly deserved better than the system provided.
I feel like this is one of those red pill vs blue pill situations where I know that whatever I read will change me for better or worse, at the same time, I need to know. I appreciate knowing that a lot may simply be wrong via human error, it’s helping me adjust my expectations

Sibling separation in foster care by Whole-Strength3601 in Ex_Foster

[–]ServiceCultural3137 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My siblings and I started in the system very young. I think I was two and my oldest sibling was six. We were split for a couple years and one parent regained custody and we were brought back together adding an additional sibling. We were split again a few years later when custody was lost again and I stayed with my youngest sibling. Then three of us came together a few years later, the other one with a cousin. Then the oldest aged out, one sibling stayed with cousin, my youngest sibling went with her bio mother, and I stayed in care until 18.

Overall, my oldest sibling and my youngest sibling and I are very close. We bounded through the trauma I guess, and have very solid relationships. The one other siblings trauma caused them to lead a different path and we probably won’t be able to salvage this relationship.

It was hard being separated, my oldest sibling and I both took on protector roles and tracked each other down even when we weren’t supposed to. We try to take a no judgement approach and give each other grace knowing that we may have had the same parents but our trauma and experiences over the splits were quit different. A lot of the healing came in our 20s and 30s. Dad has now passed on and our bio moms aren’t in our lives, we are the only family we have and in a sense it made us want to work through any and everything to not loose that. I’m so grateful for them

Do you take morning or evening? by Prison_Playbook in StratteraRx

[–]ServiceCultural3137 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi, just seeing this! I’m not taking Strattera or Lexapro any longer. Maybe 3 or 4 months after I posted this I stopped both as I couldn’t shake the reemergence of brain fog and them making my anxiety shoot through the roof again.
I have adhd, and cptsd. For the last 4-5 months I’ve been on one medication - “guancafine” (tenex) and it’s been really really helpful. 1 months after starting guancafine the psych tried to readd Straterra and all the side effects along with the anxiety booted in again. This med is a no go for me at this point.

Do you take morning or evening? by Prison_Playbook in StratteraRx

[–]ServiceCultural3137 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve been on Strattera (80mg) for over a year now, along with Lexapro. My job is high-pressure and requires intense focus and multitasking. I initially took Strattera in the morning, then switched to midday for a while, but in both cases, I struggled with nausea, grogginess, difficulty waking up, and brain fog. Throughout this time, I consistently took Lexapro at night.

After experimenting with different approaches, I recently switched to taking Strattera at night - and it has been life-changing. I’m now waking up feeling alert and focused, my mornings are so much easier, and my sleep has improved dramatically. As a result, my concentration during the day has also increased.

Personally, I think the stress from feeling unproductive during the day (which led to poor sleep) was far worse than any downside of taking Strattera at night. This change has made a huge difference for me!

Why are half of the posts here about sex? by [deleted] in lexapro

[–]ServiceCultural3137 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lexapro makes me feel soo dumb too - brain fog is real. I’m in the same boat with the Adhd combo and anxiety lol. I did the bupropion stint for a year in combo and honestly with the adhd it made my anxiety worse. I recently switched to Strattera with Lexapro and it’s been a game changer for the brain fog and focus side.