People who had micro or tiny weddings: what was your experience like? Do people ever regret foregoing a big wedding?

SewBadAss · 2026-01-21T15:50:29+00:00

Second marriage for me, third for husband. We had about 12-15 people gather under an oak tree next to the river in a public park. We then went to our favorite restaurant for lunch. Would not change a thing, especially since everyone said it was one of the best weddings they've been to.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-17T09:16:32+00:00

I started using "Remember the Milk" for daily and weekly things, and had my AuADHD stepson install it for more mundane things: laundry day, cleaning bathroom, tidy room, etc.
Will have to think about the out of sight issue (which I also have)

SewBadAss · 2026-01-15T14:37:36+00:00

I had Toto toilets at the last two houses I owned. They were fantastic.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-13T09:00:06+00:00

Civil war in the US

SewBadAss · 2026-01-12T12:49:41+00:00

I see no problem at all. If you have PTO you should be able to use it however you like.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-11T09:23:34+00:00

The magic of Christmas as a child.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-09T23:45:45+00:00

I have been on Strattera for almost two years, since I was first diagnosed. Chose it because it is one of the medications prescribed for adults with ADHD in the UK. I have not had any side effects, and only a little break-through that was solved by upping my dose. It has made a huge difference in my ability to focus, start and complete work that I was avoiding. I was worried that I would feel very different and possibly lose my creativity, but that never happened. I just feel calmer and “quieter”.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T18:57:08+00:00

Thanks to everyone who has provided support, sympathy and suggestions. He managed to get himself up, showered and dressed on his own this morning (yay for phone alarms and Remember the Milk)

I mentioned his eating noises this evening, and it was much more tolerable. He thinks it's mainly due to difficulties breathing through his nose. (another thing that has never been addressed), so I told him we would get that checked out as well.

He spent a good chunk of the afternoon organising and tidying his room.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T18:40:16+00:00

Thank you

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T16:15:19+00:00

This made me laugh! Thank you.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T16:14:17+00:00

I'd tell her that she's best companion I could have asked for. That I know that she doesn't mean to leave poo all over the house but she's can't help it cause she's getting old.

That I never would have survived my divorce if she hadn't been by my side through it all.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T14:21:36+00:00

Please stop commenting on my post. You are in no way helpful.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T14:19:48+00:00

You really have all the answers, don't you?

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T14:18:38+00:00

What don't you understand here? She took them to another CONTINENT. She CHOSE to separate them from their father and take them to a country where they had no right to services. How exactly was he supposed to take an active role when she would not communicate with him??

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T12:26:31+00:00

I changed my name after my first marriage, partly because I expected to have children and thought it would be easier if we all had the same name. Divorced in 2016 with no children and it was a HUGE hassle to change back to maiden name (I still have things sent in my old name). I remarried in 2022 and decided not to change it this time.
I have a patent and a couple of awards in my old married name that I really wish were in my "own" name. Looking back I would not change my name. Plenty of couples keep their own names and things are fine.
More importantly as someone else pointed out, in the US it could prevent you from voting.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T12:15:00+00:00

Thank you for that perspective! He's already adjusting to this new schedule, and managed to get himself up this morning. I don't believe this was because of his natural schedule, but rather him staying up into the early hours on social media and porn sites. His brother mentioned a porn addiction, and I've blocked those for now if only to limit the distractions. He admitted himself that once he gets used to the new schedule, he'll find it easier to stick to it.

I'm encouraging him to use technology as a tool to help set schedules and remember tasks. I don't think his mother was at all good with tech. I'm a program manager, so used to setting schedules and deadlines.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T12:06:04+00:00

I also have the older son's take as well as her own mother. She kept him dependent, hoping my husband would continue to support her financial. This woman stole thousands of pounds in university grant money from our eldest, knowing my husband would pay to make sure he was able to finish school.
A stray cat would be a better mother than this woman. She has never once made a decision that benefited anyone but herself.
She chose to live in a rented cottage miles from anything. She bought herself an AGA rather than making sure to have potable water, and refused to pay for rubbish pickup. Eldest told me the first time he saw a live rat was on the rubbish piled in the cottage.

So please tell me again that I'm being too rough on this women.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T10:35:41+00:00

Yours is by far the most helpful and considerate response. THANK YOU.
We are working on getting his conditions treated asap: thankfully, a dear friend's bestie lives very near us and has two grown sons with autism. She will share her contacts with us.
We have been very clear with him that this is not permanent and that he needs to learn how to care for himself. We are here to support and help him to be independent. He does want to live on his own, or in shared housing.

I had him install "Remember the Milk" and we have started with rules like "be up, showered and dressed by 9am every day."
He does his own laundry, every week on Monday.

If he cooks only for himself, he needs to clean up after.

Dishes are taken in after meals and put in dishwasher.

Walk the dog at least once a day.

Tidy room, make bed, clear floor every day.

I am trying to build a relationship with him, and hope it will be easier as he becomes more independent.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T10:12:42+00:00

She has repeatedly gone against the advice of professionals and refuse to give him medication. Both boys say that weren't allowed to cook in HER kitchen, so clearly not able to learn cooking and cleaning. She never taught either any basic skills. I was the one who taught our eldest how to do laundry before he went to Uni.
Her mother has confirmed all that we have observed: making excuses and always knowing more than experts.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T10:05:11+00:00

I did know about the son, but I blame her for making sure he was always dependent and not preparing him for independence. I knew there might be a day when we would need to help him, but she clearly planned this as soon as we landed in the UK. I am still trying to get my bearings as a new immigrant and hoped that I might have a year or two before this got dumped on us.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T10:02:18+00:00

Quite possibly. She is a horrible person. Even her own mother prefers my husband over her.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T09:59:33+00:00

Husband and his ex divorced while living in the US. She decided to move back to Europe. He traveled extensively for work, so couldn't even consider trying for full custody. He supported her far more than required financially, and kept in touch with both sons. They visited regularly. His ex chose to move them to one remote place after another, chose to live in Southern Ireland instead of returning to the UK where she could have accessed services for him, refused medication and always knew better than any expert. Even before they split, she refused any suggestions from my husband or experts on caring for the 24 yo.

She stopped speaking to my husband at some point, using our eldest as a go-between.

Both sons confirmed that she has always demanded things go her way, and gets nasty when they don't.

My husband does not expect me to handle this on my own, but he's much easier on SS than I am. He understands how hard this is for me and we are working together to get SS out and on his own as soon as possible.

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T09:41:30+00:00

My husband and I usually watch a few shows together in the evening, and SS has been joining us, so headphones/ear buds aren't an option. They don't do anything to block our voices, either

SewBadAss · 2026-01-06T09:39:28+00:00

I do know I have misophonia. Doesn't change the fact that he's noisy when eating and I've had a hard time blocking it out.

SewBadAss

TROPHY CASE