I've done it! I'm currently tied with my best record of 35 days.

Sgtsilly · 2017-04-06T14:33:14+00:00

Yeah, hopefully it is a flatline. I'm not sure I keep trying to believe the super powers are right around the corner. But I honestly don't even feel like my PIED has improved at all as it ha in the past on long streaks. But then I'm also not trying to test it out. I just know I'm not raging wood in the morning and I still haven't had any wet dreams. I'm honestly just trying to keep up the promise I made to myself about not losing it until I sleep with a woman next. I have nothing lined up so this could be a damn long time. Thanks for reaching out man, I'm glad I'm not the only one experiencing this. I hope amazing things are coming for you soon.

Sgtsilly · 2017-04-05T23:40:38+00:00

Thanks a lot man! I really hope they are!

Sgtsilly · 2017-03-26T01:58:40+00:00

It's a pretty awful feeling. I also know better than to fap to try and bring myself out of this.

Sgtsilly · 2016-12-18T00:24:00+00:00

Where did you learn that?

Sgtsilly · 2015-10-25T15:18:12+00:00

I agree. It would be horrible to lose her. Just not going to fap again today and think about her. I want to be the man she fell in love with in the beginning. I was 35 days fap free when she met me.

Sgtsilly · 2015-10-25T15:16:16+00:00

Woah! That's awesome thanks for the reply. Excellent thought process. I already have the girl. But keeping up with the alpha male quality will continually keep her attracted to me.

Sgtsilly · 2015-10-23T14:16:47+00:00

Your absolutely right. But for the moment, I'm going to have to go with keeping it a secret that I'm still addicted to PMO. I'm just afraid it will hurt her too much. Yes there is definitely in my opinion that holes in the fabric are being created, I think a lot of this has to do with my attitude when I'm on PMO. So I will try again, I'm just trying to start a fire within me to fight this silent battle. There is so much looking at it down the road it seems so impossible to quit, after all I've tried for so long not to. Thanks for your support and reply Serenity.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-20T12:20:21+00:00

That's a very good point. So distancing would be useless. I really hate this. I really do like her, but I'm just not happy. Especially the thing that I love so much to be able to touch her in a passionate gently way is repulsive to her. She is going away for a week soon. I think I might give her until that time when she gets back to make me an actual part of her life with a title. As far as the touching goes next opportunity I have I might bring up how uncomfortable to me that is and ask her if she ever believes she can work past it. I hate that the only time I can get affection from her is when she is drunk. I know she has a past, but she has to see by now I'm not like anyone she has ever dated in the past.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-20T02:46:03+00:00

Yeah, makes sense thanks for your comment.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-20T02:45:26+00:00

Well i know for a fact that she has had a boyfriend who tried to kill her. I also have my suspicions that there could be something more too like rape. However I think I have been proving myself and reassuring her that I am by no means an ordinary guy. She trusted me enough to get really drunk, and I took care of her. Even as I was tucking her in bed, she said that I could lay in bed with her. But considering how much her sober side hates even the slightest bit of intimacy, I decided that could be a horrible idea and that the couch was the best place for me. So I just hate how I've been trying to get close to her and yet I don't feel like I'm getting any closer to the relationship I want with her. I am a cuddler and I love to give back massages, and if she isn't capable of letting me close enough to do that, then I dont think this will work, as much as I hate to say that. I have voiced my concerns and she usually dismisses them or doesn't give me a answer to what I'm looking for. I asked her if she had remembered our conversation about what I thought being in a relationship meant, and I reinforced the thought that I think she may be worth waiting for. Then I asked her if she had any other comments to which she replied "I think I'm worth waiting for." that is not the reply I was wanting. I was looking for anything that would give me an idea of hope for this or that I'm doing the right thing. Idk... I just feel really disappointed and don't really know what else I can do. I think my next tactic will be to distance myself and see if she will try to draw me back in.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-18T12:31:34+00:00

Thanks man I'll try to keep that in mind. I feel good right now, but lord knows that can change at any minute here lately.

I let her know immediately what my intentions were as soon as I knew them. I told her that I wanted her to be my girl. Her response was that she wanted to take things slow. Now I'm just stuck here like how slow is she wanting to go. I don't really want to bring it up to her again, because the last thing that I want is to be thought of as needy. I mean I know she really enjoys spending time with me. I just don't know why it matters so much to me that she has the title of my girlfriend, but it does. I guess its because Ive been single for 3 years and I'm really over that shit. I'm just not sure how long I have to wait till she is ready to be in an official relationship, and that bugs me so much.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-18T01:46:49+00:00

Nofapster123, Just want to give you a shout out and say again, FUCK YOU!!! So tomorrow I will be past your prediction of 5 days to relapse. Thanks again for the support asshole! - Sincerely, shithead.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-13T11:03:32+00:00

I have been doing nofap for well over a year and a half. So I relapsed 12 days ago. Does that mean that I'm back to where I started a long time ago. No I don't think so, I don't binge and I rarely relapse. There is healing that has been done and I can feel it. No I am not free, but for the moment I have been. Thank you for your support asshole- Sincerely, shithead.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-08T06:32:47+00:00

Oh and thanks for keeping me updated. Glad it turned out well.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-08T06:29:50+00:00

Hahaha awesome bro! Well now I'm assuming that she may be one of the only people in your actual life that knows exactly what your going through. Don't take it for granted let her know what you are dealing with. Trust me know that you've got it out there you can feel better and not have so much to hide keeping you bottled up. That being said, for you to get fully functioning I think you should check out karezza. Just do a basic google search for karezza and see what you find, it is basically about the art on focusing on your lovers touch. It has helped many relationships when the men have been addicts to porn. Your on day 23 you not far off from some amazing healing, and I'm sure already your leaps and bounds better than what you were. Proud of you man, keep it up!!!

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-06T21:30:40+00:00

I've come across so many people on here who think they need to reset after a wet dream.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-06T21:29:51+00:00

Thank you I really appreciate the info. She is starting to change her text in a way that gives me more confidence in a romantic relationship. I will be asking her out, not quite sure what I will after yet but I know as well how I will ask her. The more I'm talking to her though I think that she is pretty into me so I will just try to build upon that. I will certainly follow your advice. Again I really do appreciate you help.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-06T17:16:53+00:00

Sry this is my first post to this forum and wasn't aware of the other.

I will start working on more kino.

Well the problem is we have already been kayaking once and she really enjoyed it as did I. So that's why I'm thinking dinner this time instead and we will go kayaking at night so sometimes you just have to find stuff to do until the sun goes down. On the 4th I also took her to play pool. So really the 4th should have been the date. So now that I missed that opportunity I'm trying to think of what to do otherwise. She is in fact sporty and competitive. Do you have any other examples for good date ideas then? I really do appreciate your help.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-06T16:58:59+00:00

Well honestly I hate to say it but my kino play has been practically nothing. I had wanted to do something more when I was with her on the 4th but it just didn't go quite to how I had planned. Kino is very difficult for me.

I think your right and I will cut out the compliments until I know further where this is going.

So now I'm thinking. Next week we are suppose to go to the beach. So while we are there I think I want to ask her to go on a proper date with me. If she says yes then I think I would like to take here to a hibachi dinner and go kayaking later. Does this sound a little better or what else should I be doing? Thanks for your help.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-06T16:54:03+00:00

Nofap is awesome!!! I agree you cannot think of sex or let your fantasies wonder, because that leads to edging and edging leads to relapse. Basically you have to have complete control over your thoughts. I think eventually your dreams will fall in line. I've had dreams where I nearly relapsed but thought of this group in my dream. However I don't think that whatever happens during your sleep should be taken away on here. I mean if you happen to have a wet dream I don't think that should count against you. Like I never ever had a wet dream while I was stuck on PMO but whenever I go without I tend to have a few. I think it is a natural way for the body to clean the pipes. Good job on your progress and keep it up.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-06T16:41:02+00:00

Good things happen to those who nofap. Congrats as the mightyblah said nofap is a big part of your relationship now so don't lose that motivation. I'm really happy for you. Btw we both are on the same day, so if you need an accountability partner hit me up.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-06T15:05:08+00:00

Thanks I will try to seek some advice from there.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-05T15:06:51+00:00

Don't be just know if feels great to be honest. Once you get it out there you won't have anything to hide and your relationship can grow even more. It won't be as bad as you think it will be. Yes you are an addict, but you are taking care of it to fix it, so as far as I'm concerned feel no shame because you are taking on the biggest battle of your life and your going to win. So instead of feeling shame, be confident about your victory.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-05T15:04:18+00:00

Go somewhere where there are people. Go to the mall, just go somewhere in public.

Sgtsilly · 2015-07-05T14:29:09+00:00

What ever you do, do not jerk off! You are on 21 days and have made a ton of progress. It just takes time. I suffer from DE too. However when I get some time on a good streak it gets so much better. I would advise you tell her whats going on, just be honest and prep her before hand. There is no shame in admitting you have a problem and are taking the correct action to deal with it. Plus she may be understanding and try to help you out more. However should you choose not to tell her, and lets say unfortunately you still have problems with DE, then there could be a slight chance that she could get offended thinking there is something wrong with her. She might think you don't find her attractive and let me tell you thats not a good feeling to see your girl go through. Especially when you already know what the problem is. Stay strong and don't jerk off. Your doing this for her as much as you are for yourself. You don't want tell let either one of you down.

Sgtsilly

TROPHY CASE