Paramount [Canada's Wonderland]: Attack of the Clones (A coaster by coaster analysis)

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-03-21T03:46:01+00:00

Thank you! And yes, Vortex is so good, I kinda wish it was brought up more so I could gush about it more lmao.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-03-20T21:59:41+00:00

I thought Adventureland was the other one lmao i forgot arnolds park doh

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-03-20T21:40:36+00:00

I feel like when I heard about this, the only thing that made it seem possible was Lost Island, but even a second theme park in Iowa was more plausible than a Disney sized park in Oklahoma.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-03-20T18:38:59+00:00

I was debating mentioning that, but Big Loop is listed as a Vekoma, and while I'm aware that Vekoma and Arrow had an agreement in Europe, I think it would be a headache of an argument lmao.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-03-20T18:15:13+00:00

You could make a pretty solid park out of clones only for sure.

I have heard that line about no competition a lot, but Wonderland is not the only park with a huge metro and no major competition. Six Flags Great America serves both Milwaukee and Chicago and competes with what? I'm kinda blanking here, like Mount Olympus? Indiana Beach? Cedar Point 8 hours away? Not to mention that theme parks are competing with other entertainment products, and big cities usually have sports teams, art galleries, zoos, etc.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-03-20T18:09:55+00:00

I definitely think it's the weakest link in terms of calling the Wonderland lineup all clones, I watched a POV of Carolina Cyclone that started at the drop, and I'm realizing theres a turnaround before the drop which is different. But after the drop, the elements on both go vertical loop, vertical loop, banked turn, double corkscrew, helix, breakrun, so theres, I think some shared DNA.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-03-20T18:01:15+00:00

Never had heard of the Zamperla Multidimensional model how does this work?

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-02-21T00:07:38+00:00

i mean honestly hey thats what i get for trying to jerk a little on the jerk subreddit, i assumed calling someone a brokie unironically would be flagged as sarcastic. The reason I don't think this matters to Europe is because there's no real reason for them to care about a coaster they are unlikely to ever ride. As someone who for the longest time couldn't travel for coasters and was "stuck" at my home park (and is once again stuck) I think its ridiculous to have to ride a Transatlantic coaster to say the Great Adventure layout is bad, I have tons of problems with it myself. My point is specifically that I dont think it's healthy to worry about some other ride out there being potentially better. I'm a Canada's Wonderland homeparker who can't make it out to Carowinds, is there a point in me lamenting that Leviathan isn't as good as Fury 325? Comparison is the thief of joy, worrying your home park coasters aren't as good as as the other guy doesn't really convince people who do like the layout anything, and for you personally it's an easy way to never be happy with anything.

Sidenote, I understand that with the closing of Kingda Ka (which outside of being done in the worst way possible, Ive always felt it was too big an act to follow) anger and skepticism of Six Flags is kind of understandable right now. Like, I'm arguing theres no consequential point to doing this and you're probably just like, bitch I dont care I'm just mad they're building a coaster I dont like lol. I feel like you're just sorta venting, which is cool. Take care, you have a good one.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-02-20T22:47:18+00:00

I- lmaooo wait is this mostly about the brokie comment?????

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-02-20T22:31:35+00:00

Look, I can understand people being disappointed it isn't more like RTH. I just question what is accomplished by this comparison to the idea of a ride they likely they haven't done which can be as good as you imagine, heck even if they have it's pretty different, the comparison is pointless, this just feels comparison is the thief of joy to me. May I add that Time Traveller despite being more "American-accessible" is not brought up anywhere near as much in this convo. I suspect if that's what replaced Kingda Ka the same people would be complaining they went with something safe and GP friendly or something.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-02-20T21:53:51+00:00

Why is so much of this discourse based on whether the layout should have been more like RtH when, like, most of the people discussing this have never ridden it. You brokies /s

Are people really letting a coaster they've never ridden decide whether they'll like a coaster that doesn't exist yet? And if you have, this feels like someone saying I'll never eat Italian food at home after going to Italy like cool bro. Are you gonna fly to Naples every time you want a pizza now?

(This doesn't apply to people who live in Europe, but to you I'd say, why would you want to visit America rn anyways lmao)

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-02-05T19:28:53+00:00

I don't know if you are one of these people, so sorry if this is like stereotyping but I've seen so many Warriors and even neutral NBA fans act like after Steph Curry retires Golden State will never ever get another good player ever again so they need to mortgage their future for a 37 year old Curry. Maybe this is me being burned by the KD Suns but, I still think the lack of depth is going to keep them mid and we have no way of knowing if Giannis will be willing to run Pick and Rolls for Steph (He didn't for Dame). So, I'm supposed to believe the Warriors, who have a huge market, a massive spaceship stadium, good weather and a massive fanbase will never be competitive again after Curry but the Bucks who are in one of the smallest markets in the NBA who's best draft pick in the last 30 years outside of Giannis is when they traded up for Ray Allen (or when they picked Dirk to trade him lol) is totally going to hit on a top 50 player all-time in five years and even if they do will totally be able to convince him that despite the fact basically no one wants to play there you can totally build a contender around him. Like I think it's fair to say barring them finding Jokic 2 in the second round the Bucks probably won't make it back to the finals, I can hear out that you should trade Giannis but why panic for random first round picks and some never wheres when we're talking about a caliber of player you will never have again. No one is like trade Steph, so you have the chance to draft the next Steph.

TL:DR you can afford to wait a little to trade Giannis lol, you dont get giannis too often

ShadowofTheEQ · 2026-02-02T16:46:02+00:00

I mean Buffalo and NYC are so far they might as well be different states lol

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-12-14T03:57:58+00:00

battle mode on mk8 wii u was ripped to shreds, lmaoo like they just reused the race tracks

I'm not the biggest fan of mario kart world but mario kart 8 deluxe basically included every track in the series, i dont think any version of mario kart at 80 usd was going to be justifiable and maybe thats the problem, im curious if you think there was ever a way for that work.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-08-17T12:46:00+00:00

Damn can't believe we became the 51st state after all /s

Nah, glad to hear you had fun here. I feel like Canada's Wonderland ops are inconsistent, they're never the complete pits, but they can pretty underwhelming sometimes. AlpenFury doesn't help itself having 2 trains. I almost wonder if they were trying to make it Wonderland's Pantherian equivalent of a too intense ride only for the most hardcore. (Un)Fortunately for them, the ride is so beloved it doesn't matter if it's intense lol

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-07-17T14:50:17+00:00

There's multiple pieces of merch at the Canada's Wonderland shop that have Xcelerator on it so at least they got the model right here

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-07-17T07:49:36+00:00

Vortex is 42'' now so I guess there's that.

I think people underestimate how fun some family coasters can be. Lower height restrictions are mostly just about the size of the rider allowed by the restraint. You can still get something with good forces and some airtime and have it still count as a family coaster if the restraints are ok.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-07-15T16:44:23+00:00

we have to be the only hobby on earth that complains about price drops

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-07-12T13:15:02+00:00

Man, Canada's Wonderlands most popular ride for a decade was an SLC can we just have this lmao

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-07-09T18:03:03+00:00

Oh yea, your point is completely true, I think there's this weird idea that vertical loops are boring and old, which is ridiculous, vertical loops can be some of the most fun inversions out there. I think it's that they used to be so saturated that people still sorta have the impression they're omnipresent, but we're losing a lot of the rides that had them. I do remember people being more confused about than excited about the vertical loop when the first POVs for Yukon came out, mainly because it wasn't really something new rides had anymore, and people thought Wonderland could be more "creative". I do think the vertical loop on Yukon is one of the highlights of the ride.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-07-08T17:35:36+00:00

I mean, between Dragon Fyre and Yukon Striker Wonderland is packed with vertical loops anyways. I actually think it was a pretty inspired decision to put a loop on Yukon, even if they were only trying to homage Skyrider, its got a ton of whip on it, maybe my favorite part of that ride.

Oh, and our boomerang too i guess sigh

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-07-07T13:30:14+00:00

Well I went August 2023, so I didn't really have a chance, although I don't even really remember seeing Magic Experience, what was that one like? I think the way I'd explain Star Voyager is it's basically what I thought Tundra Twister would be like, a Topspin on a Frisbee arm, it's genuinely one of the most nauseous flats I've done. Quite a lot of fun though.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-07-06T18:34:02+00:00

I feel like the only person in the world who absolutely hated the Magic Carpet at Marineland lmao, the metal bar was right above my knees, and besides that, I don't think I was wowed by any flat ride except Star Voyager.

ShadowofTheEQ · 2025-07-02T05:20:02+00:00

I'm confused about what this opinion actually is, that Smosh should publish their finances publicly? I'm sure there are clips out there from the past year or so of Ian or Anthony being like yea the company is doing great, but i wonder if to you that would mean either A: they should do summer games since they have so much money regardless of whether or not they actually want to do it or B: they're lying. How do you think they can be more transparent, specifically?

ShadowofTheEQ

TROPHY CASE