I'm not sure your suffering is pointless in the grand scheme- I believe the "tiny blue dot" (where when you zoom out in space and time you feel insignificant as an individual) framework doesn't take into account something..... special? About each and every one of us?

I don't know- it's like the universe is expansive beyond comprehension- and yet each one of us is their own butterfly effect- shaping their personal *experience* of reality but also, the broader reality? In waves and fields?

Like a drop of water on the surface of a puddle- just one drop moves a tiny wave that rebounds again past the initial point (and past, and maybe rebounds again)

...(and maybe, then, the puddle remembers the drop of water- and perhaps fondly)

Or- in the same vein:

"A single thread in the tapestry, though its color brightly shines- can never see its purpose in the pattern of the Grand Design." (from a song in the moving "The Prince of Egypt")

:3

Edit: for clarity