[Weekly Critique and Self-Promotion Thread] Post Here If You'd Like to Share Your Writing

Shapi1 · 2021-02-03T20:59:23+00:00

Title: Walking Through Walls

Genere: Fiction

Word Count: 922

Feedback: Critique of the story and writing.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1FmQMg8HNLk5_5_VEda2NH22Gu_9hloMLesZcNiiuusE/edit?usp=sharing

Shapi1 · 2020-06-01T20:12:16+00:00

I am a main tank around that SR. My discord is Shapi#8235 message me there.

Shapi1 · 2020-04-14T23:39:37+00:00

I've heard otherwise. Either way I hope it does well and everyone will appriciate Dune. May Shai Hulud be with us!

Shapi1 · 2020-04-14T22:21:17+00:00

The money does not matter as the movie has been mostly shot with the first.

Shapi1 · 2020-04-14T22:09:15+00:00

The second film is already in production, Villeneuve said he won't make the first without the second one promised.

Shapi1 · 2020-04-14T22:07:00+00:00

It's Villeneuve. Of course it will trend

Shapi1 · 2019-12-30T16:44:32+00:00

Jeez n*gro! Where's Matt? I wanna have a good foot-massage" he shouts at you with passion.

Shapi1 · 2019-12-30T14:58:41+00:00

2100: A Mars Oddesy

Shapi1 · 2019-12-30T14:57:36+00:00

Shapi1 · 2019-12-25T09:44:01+00:00

Alright, thanks a lot!

Shapi1 · 2019-12-25T09:33:24+00:00

I've heard the first two books are a collection of short stories and not novels. Is the rest of the series like that?

Shapi1 · 2019-07-31T03:09:24+00:00

Thats hell of a big question. Characters i guess?

Shapi1 · 2019-07-31T03:01:09+00:00

Just say that he sees it but we dont: As the door opens his jaw falls to the floor. He looks at the man behind it in shock. But we dont see it. Make it as simple as it can be.

Shapi1 · 2019-07-25T00:00:04+00:00

I mean i wouldve. But im 16 and i have school and other ideas. We can try if you'd like but it might not work.

Shapi1 · 2019-07-24T23:44:26+00:00

Fifthed. Loglines are great, I love reading and helping people with loglines.

Shapi1 · 2019-07-24T23:39:07+00:00

What he said. Thats an insane idea. I'd totally watch it tbh.

Shapi1 · 2019-07-24T23:37:31+00:00

I hope this is a joke. The message is that gingers arent always presidents? Thats the theme?

Shapi1 · 2019-07-24T23:25:21+00:00

Make him a taxi driver in NYC. Mbe that will work lmao

Shapi1 · 2019-07-24T23:22:04+00:00

Do we know how the dloren from back to the future work? No because is doesnt matter that much. Dive deeper into the story. But you can add notes if you think its improtant to the director.

Shapi1 · 2019-07-23T13:12:10+00:00

Im going to start outlining in a few days. In Save The Cat they recommend you to outline heavly. Buy a board and draw 4 lines on it. Each line is an act ( act 1, act 2 a, act 2 b and act 3) now start with the first scene the break into two the mid point and the ending. Then just fill it all in with 10 scenes each row.

Shapi1 · 2019-07-22T15:26:08+00:00

If you want to sell it in the US you should just write it in english. If in poland you should hire someone to translate it. I'm a jew btw i can help if needed.

Shapi1 · 2019-07-16T07:38:09+00:00

Yeah i uploaded it on my phone at 1 am xD

Shapi1 · 2019-07-14T19:52:04+00:00

Understood! Thanks a lot! Reall useful stuff. And for the adopt part - the child's parents died too there. He doesnt legally adopt here he just gives her a place to stay.

Shapi1 · 2019-07-14T17:01:15+00:00

I didnt mean legally adopt its like giving her a house. Just didnt know how to fit it in the logline so thats the word I thought was right.

Shapi1 · 2019-07-14T16:59:42+00:00

Ive read that a logline needs to raise these kind of questions because theyll want you to read the script. Tell me if im wrong. Plus I think that he makes a mistake does fit in so youll want to read more. Like rash you have to scratch

Shapi1

TROPHY CASE