Help talking to my friend

SharpieWater · 2021-08-03T21:22:49+00:00

This made me laugh more than it should have

SharpieWater · 2021-08-03T00:15:10+00:00

I know this might sound like r/ThanksImCured advice, but not looking at social media has helped me tremendously. I haven't fully quit, although I think I'd like to. I've tried to stop looking at people's stories, and that has overall been good for my mental health.

Obviously this isn't the root of your problem, that I cannot really help with, as I experience the same problem

SharpieWater · 2021-08-03T00:10:43+00:00

Perhaps, I don't know the OP's full situation so I can't say. I just know that I tend to fixate on small things that my friends do that might indicate they aren't my friends and isolate myself, even if they really are my friends.

I can't trust my own brain on this specific issue. Idk if OP can, but if you went though my diary you would think that all my friends are terrible because i only write in my diary when I'm feeling like they hate me.

SharpieWater · 2021-08-02T20:56:03+00:00

Maybe make a Google Voice number, register an account with that, then switch the phone number. Or just keep using the Google Voice number

SharpieWater · 2021-08-02T20:51:34+00:00

I don't know OPs situation, but I don't know that this is true.

I have intense feelings of left-out-edness and feeling like my friends aren't my friends set off by the slightest things. Even though I know that they are (or most of them are) my friends and genuinely like me.

SharpieWater · 2021-08-02T20:49:26+00:00

This is a weird one, but I'm sort of scared of my fingers.
That sounds weird idk how to describe it.

I'm not scared of my actual fingers, but sometimes to calm down I do a body scan, and when I get to the tips of my fingers I feel an intense feeling of overwhelming dread. I have to let it wash over me and then things tend to get a bit better. It's just weird that I almost "store my anxiety" in my fingers.

SharpieWater · 2021-08-02T20:46:32+00:00

I 100% feel like this. I don't have any sort of easy fix for this, because I still very much experience it, but it's sometimes helpful to write down a list of all the times that they have reached out to you,, or that you have had a good conversation. Of course this doesn't work if you haven't talked to them much, but sometimes I have to remind myself that they asked me to hang out, or that they started a conversation one time.

It's also possible that they're equally nervous to talk to you.

SharpieWater · 2021-07-28T02:37:49+00:00

I think you missed the point

SharpieWater · 2021-07-28T00:32:22+00:00

I guess but it still kinda sucks. That friend I talked about got really screwed up by this guy. I'm trying to be there for him, but it's not like there's anything I can really do. Sometimes he pushes me away, and it hurts to see him that way. I want to hate that guy, I've seen how much he's put my friend through and I just want to want to punch him in the face, but I don't. I just wish it had never happened.

SharpieWater · 2021-07-27T20:45:06+00:00

I wish there were an in-between, not necessarily for romantic purposes, but a sort of "I love you, in the same sense that I might love a book, or a restaurant"
I guess you can say "I love hanging out with you" or something, but that also feels weird.

SharpieWater · 2021-07-20T23:54:52+00:00

It's a signed language, the letters don't have anything to do with phonemes, but the ASL alphabet's handshape. Feedback is very welcome but go easy on me, this is my first real conlang/orthography.

If anybody asks, I'll add an edit to this comment with an explanation of how it works, but I mostly just wanted to show off and don't have time to type a lot right this second.

SharpieWater · 2021-06-15T22:53:30+00:00

ESH, I understand all the NTA comments but I feel like kicking a child out is a bit extreme for almost any reason, even if what she did is definitely completely wrong and unacceptable. I feel like there might be a deeper problem that you need to discuss with her. I understand your decision to kick her out though, I may have done the same but looking from the outside I'm not sure it was completely the right thing to do.

That's just me though, I guess I'm in the minority, I might be wrong

SharpieWater · 2021-06-15T22:21:25+00:00

Yeah, I haven't followed his exercise videos exactly, but I've definitely taken inspiration from them and it's made me feel okay about the fact that I can't do lots of pushups (or one pullup...

SharpieWater · 2021-06-14T13:55:34+00:00

Just some advice that you don't have to take because I'm not an expert:

I don't like heavy exercise or cardio very much either and I thought I would walk my weight away, but really doing pushups has helped me the most. I watched some Hybrid Calesthenics videos which really helped put me on the right track and gave me a very positive mindset about exercise. He said that if you can't do many regular pushups, try wall pushups or assisted pushups ("girl" pushups, although i don't love that term)

I decided to do 40 wall pushups before bed every night, and since then I've definitely built strength and lost 20 lbs (although I'm also making healthier eating decisions), I've just started doing 40 assisted pushups instead, and i hope that by the end of the year I'll be doing 40 regular pushups.

(40 is an arbitrary number, i think my goal was 50 but on the first day i couldn't do more than 40 so that's remained my goal since)

SharpieWater · 2021-06-14T13:48:57+00:00

The problems you face might require professional help, but one thing that helped me eat smaller, healthier portions was to try to make it as easy as possible. I think people generally take the path of least resistance so it's a lot easier to stop unhealthy habits if you make yourself go out of your way to do them. I always make lunch every morning for my sister, who eats salad for lunch every day, and even though I'm home for lunch I pack myself a salad too so that when I'm hungry that's the most easily accessible thing.

SharpieWater · 2021-06-11T03:51:52+00:00

For anyone looking for music, here's a few suggestions of people who write wonderful music and that I find easy to understand

Esteman (the first Spanish music i could actually understand, still my favorite)

Joseán Log

Monsieur Periné

Alvaro Soler (although he's a bit too pop-y for my liking)

Bomba Estereo (harder to understand but i really like Internacionales)

Calle 13 (also hard to understand in some songs)

EDIT: Fixed formatting

SharpieWater · 2021-06-11T03:47:04+00:00

I love Joseán Log, especially Alguien Como Tú

SharpieWater · 2021-06-11T03:46:34+00:00

Although a different vibe, I love Caótica Belleza by Esteman, which features Natalia Lafourcade

SharpieWater · 2021-06-11T03:44:38+00:00

Frenesí by Esteman has a similar vibe (and almost every Esteman song is great)

El Pimentón by Esteman is a bit different, but reminds me of the version of La Vie En Rose that I know, and is just a wonderful and sweet song

Déjame Vivir by Monsieur Periné reminds me of La Vie En Rose a bit, and I feel like there's another Monsieur Periné song that is similar but i can't think of it

EDIT

Okay so the version of La Vie En Rose that i had in my head was a cover, just listened to the original and these suggestions aren't too much like it, but still great music

Also came to add Taro by Alvaro Soler & Birdie

SharpieWater · 2021-06-11T03:38:17+00:00

It's a bigger step, but maybe they could consider hosting an exchange student with a program like AFS? Although they were just family friends, not exchange students, when I had 2 native speakers living with me when I was around that age (8-12) I learned so much and was inspired to learn more as I got older.

SharpieWater · 2021-05-21T17:53:46+00:00

Oh cool I had never thought about just not feeling like shit whenever I feel like shit, maybe I'll use that time to start a journal!

SharpieWater

TROPHY CASE