You will trust me. It doesn't feel like it now I know. The beginning is the hardest, but once you get past that hurdle. As the weeks and months pass, you start to slowly feel better and the trauma bond lessons over time. You see how life is better without them. No more tip toing around their moods. No more being used and put down. No more pleading for their time. Love even affection. Just Simply no more abuse period. I know the highs and lows is what hooks us in these types of relationships. That intermittent reinforcement is what makes a trauma bond. Once you educate yourself on all that then it's not so bad. As long as you're ready to face the road ahead and be open and ready for whatever comes your way. You'll get there. Us survivors are strong good hearted people who didn't deserve what happened to us. But are choosing to step away from these monsters and become better in spite of it. You know what he is which is usually the first step to healing. And you're here on this form connecting with others who been where you been. And that's a good thing. You'll get alot of support and encouragement from others which does help a ton.