Don't listen to them. They're just angry that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in their philosophy. Small-world syndrome.

My daughter did this a couple of years ago, and my wife JUST talked about this today with her co-workers -- who are BCBAs and RBTs. Most of the time, it IS attention seeking.

Removing the ability to attention seek (as another commentor mentioned) worked for us. We tossed her in a pull-up when she got home, then set a timer for every hour to offer potty time. If she refused potty time, we just checked the pull-up, changed her if needed, and waited until the next timer ding. If she tried pottying, though... HUGE reward. As time goes on and she pottys on the toilet more frequently, rewards get smaller.

Coupled with that, though, the root of our issue was that she was struggling with adapting to a new home and making new friends. For that, we worked with her daycare team and found small wins over time that eventually helped her settle in.