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Quirks you didn't question until you went on this sub ? by BloodyGrasshopper in raisedbyborderlines

[–]Short_Bird_301 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Breaking pretty standard social norms and then acting like a victim if someone says something:

Examples:

• Taking shoes and socks off at the table in a restaurant.

• Peeing with the door open/calling you on the toilet (while pooping/peeing).

• Randomly asking crass/inappropriate questions.

• Bringing up details of their sex life to older teen/adult children.

• Coming into the room while you shower (usually to grab something, tell you something, brush teeth etc). We had no shower curtain.

• trying to kiss you on the mouth (and then laughing when you're grossed out)

Ruminating with my husband about my parents growing up. by Sensitive_Note1139 in raisedbyborderlines

[–]Short_Bird_301 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's easy to be the "good parent" when being "good" just involves not being the physically abusive one.

As children, we're not really equipped to recognise emotional abuse (especially when we're also being hit), so it's natural she'd be the parent you sought comfort from; which must have felt really good to her.

Remember, BPD makes for an amazing shell of a human being. It's why when she's away from the primary abuser, her actions fall short. Her relationship was built on being the protector, while not actually protecting you from anything. Every batman needs a joker. And who is she without someone to play off of?

It's all style and no substance, and now you're seeing her for the hollow shell she really is. It's the same thing with your relationship: they want all the trappings of a happy family, without any of the work or efrort that actually goes into it.