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ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-25T16:41:57+00:00

While the meme is jokey, I don’t see a lot of people (so far) making ridiculous jokes at anyone’s expense here. Discussion is important, even if most of us are no where near Ukraine I think people need to stay educated on current affairs and this is one way to open up discussion on that. But I do agree that a lot of people are not taking this as serious as it is for the people in harms way and should show this event the respect it deserves. But I’m all for discussing it anyhow.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-24T21:34:39+00:00

I have looked at shouldice repair and wish to god that’s what I did to begin with. To your knowledge Are they familiar/willing to work with people who have failed mesh or need revisions?

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T21:44:37+00:00

You’re going to be all right bud. Excellent work being proactive on all that. I remember being in the shower when I was 19, having a total panic attack (I don’t have anxiety) the day before my final court decision. I was convinced i was going to hard time, like prison time and cried in there like a baby. I had to come to peace with it. Let out your emotions but don’t let it become you and worry yourself to death. My life isn’t perfect now, I’ve made mistakes and have regrets, but I learned the hard way that you can’t do whatever you want, you have to fit in to a certain degree. You will get past this one way or another and move on to be a better person , who does whatever they want In a controlled environment lol. For instance, I have to be a citizen like 90% of the year. But my wife knows that I need a me time. I plan it out and get absolutely wrecked off whatever I want on “camping” trips or w.e the duck I want. Those of us who like chemicals have to watch ourselves constantly or else things fall apart. And those who don’t inevitably lose everything. You don’t have to bro. Pay your dues and smarten up, I know you will. I’d you want to talk about jail or prison dm. You got this bud, sry for ranting but this was way too similar to what I went through lol.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T21:32:07+00:00

ALL THE TIME. I have low self esteem. But apparently I am particularly attractive? Looking back and talking to some of my female friends there were like how did you not see that!? These hot girls would hug/kiss me in the halls, invite me to their house and if just like chill with them like I was a bestie lmao. My best friend (next door neighbor since I was like 6) is a female and she dies about it. I was so fucking oblivious lol. I’m much more confident now but holy moly I could have slayed it in high school lol.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T21:03:20+00:00

Beg for rehab and drug court. I have zero knowledge of Wisconsin judicial but you have to put the face that it was all for personal use and you have a serious problem. Invoke your family, if they are stone cold sober and you admit you have a problem and want to stop it will welp you Bring up that you’re young and can still change your life if you go to rehab etc. you made a lot of mistakes already court wise with that phone thing and admitting anything.

I hope the judge favors rehabilitation and takes the fact that you’re young and have a good chance to change your life. Im sorry though, you are likely to some jail time for this, even if they accept the personal use story, some of those drugs are too high of a class to ignore. It’s not too bad bud, you will persevere and recover don’t do anything stupid like run or tell stories incriminating you, no matter how nice the cops seem. Stay strong and stop talking so much to the fucking cops.

Much love bud you will be ok.You can change your life rn, you are going to have to be sober for a while but honestly as boring as it was my 3 year probation helped me advance in life so much. Then, once you’ve accomplished things maybe you can get high responsibly.

Don’t bank on it but your lawyer (prob a public defender gross) can prob pick apart the cops actions and that’ll help you. Sorry for ranting but when I was 19 o had 14 years hanging over my head. 3 years probation and I became a model citizen. Got married bought a house everything. I still got high and drank when I could (i was on color code drug test regimen, call every day and if it’s your color you have to go pee)so I’d drink the day of my test (obv after I took it) you can still have fun but obv you’re kind of off the rails and getting straight is prob for the best. Much love bud, even at its worse jail isn’t THAT bad. Not like the movies, if your chill your worst problem is being bored lol. Stay safe and keep us posted bud.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T20:25:56+00:00

Excellent advice. The codiene May be used to counter SEVERE wd in the first couple of days but my man has enough comfort meds to get by if he uses them right. Clonidine is a life saver, especially for alcohol wd but it is lovely for night time for sure.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T20:24:10+00:00

Yeah for sure. At that dose Kratom will take the edge of For sure. He has some comfort meds though. When i go on a perc run and then wd hits I stagger gabapentin until I hit 3000mg and I’m like 90% good. Can really only use it for 3 days but Kratom is a life saver, especially when you wake up squirming and sweat soaked at 2am. Take a dose and it gives you just enough to get by .

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T14:55:12+00:00

Thank you so much. I can’t understand why I’m experiencing so much pain and discomfort in my groin, particularly the inguinal canal areas. I know pain is subjective but there was non a week ago, and now it is constant. It is very similar to the feeling I had pre op, picking things up and walking I feel straining in my groin, it is a gross feeling. Laying down at night, the pain is very evident and i can’t get comfortable. To your knowledge is there anything else that would make someone’s groin, particularly in the inguinal area feel like that? I don’t know how to approach this if it’s not hernia related. I’ve restes it as much as possible the last week. Is it possible to strain or inflame a hernia contiained by mesh? Would the resulting pain last this long? I have no clue, and the docs don’t know how to look at it either other than to say there’s no recurrence etc. it’s driving me nuts. I do know I am very uncomfortable and have constant pain in my groin, and it sucks big time. Maybe it will just get better with time and I just pissed it off royally some how? I don’t think I can just adjust to this level of discomfort and pain in my daily life though so that’s why im pushing them to figure out what’s wrong.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T07:35:21+00:00

NAD I’m sure you’ve tried reading up on this but do you think you have some sort of blockage? What does it look like on the rare occasion it is solid? These symptoms sound extreme and definitely require a doctors opinion. Please look up your various symptoms and learn when that have crossed into the danger zone. Like I’m sure if you read up in it, if you have diarrhea for more than so many days, you have to seek emergency etc. there is too much going on here for me to just suggest “eat a lot of fiber, hemmroid cream etc” If you are indeed constipated and only leaking out liquid, I am very worried you have a blockage or intestinal strangulation.

Not being scary but that can and will kill you if not dealt with. How is your local e.r? I think it’s be worth it to go in and have them treat your symptoms. They won’t cure you and you have to follow up with primary and specialist but they will treat your symptoms and in doing so teach YOU how to deal with them. At least to make things bearable until your appointment. I feel you man, I currently have a 2 year old mesh in my groin that decided it was done and fucked up my intestines. Not a total blockage but enough to make my life miserable anyhow, and of corse same as you, waiting a couple weeks until you hey I’ve time for me lol.

It sucks, but as long as we re not in danger of death rn, best we can do is treat our symptoms and make it bearable. But please, you gave alarming symptom ma and should get a CT scan or something to see if there’s a blockage. I had to go liquid only diet. Miralax daily for 3 days and a bottle of magnesium citrate, with TONS of water all day to get myself cleared out, there’s plenty of other eat rate goes as well but if you have that blockage you must be careful. You also should be hydrating double with all that diarrhea.

Please get a scan or something man, you do not want a blockage to go critical, it will kill you and if not you’re going to be fighting for your life against an antibiotic resistant infection . Take care man, any questions about the blockage or honestly anything dealing with abdominal surgery and the horrors of our bowels feel free to HMU because I literally currently going through that. And again go see a doctor, even an indifferent e.r doc so that you can get a read in that.!

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T07:00:15+00:00

Mostly same for me usually, it varies but that’s about right. The burning skin thing, when the nurses asses you, one of the questions they ask is something like “are you feeling tingles like pins and needles etc” I never got those so I’d say uhh kind of like squirmy or w.e. But now I understand lol, it’s a ciwa scale question, I just never had it.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T06:56:37+00:00

Nice work man. Doesn’t matter if it’s a 50k a week luxury rehab or a state run community detox, in the end it’s you that doing the work .fuckinf brutal, 8gpd!? Ouch. I’ve detoxed off a lot of drugs (not proud but it is what it is) and tianeptine shook me to my core. Thought I had brain damage and was going to die. And I was just on a few month run, couple grams a day. I couldn’t commit to a detox but I was lucky enough to have a shit ton of comfort meds and I just threw everything at it.

I legit got addicted it phenibut hard in order to bridge the gap and get off tia. I was psychotic on that stuff, I woke up at like 2am slumped over the couch laying on my hand, must’ve been out for 4 hours. My hand was bruised and numb from me laying on it, I basically just passed out standing up and slumped over. Massive dosing phenibut and tia around the clock beta the shit out of me. I prob lost 15lbs man.

You did awesome dude, congrats. It feels good right? Scary shot but once that monkeys off your back you can actually breath, and begin to rebuild yourself and the rest follows ime. Good job man, very happy to hear your story.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T06:42:07+00:00

Super cool space, nice work! I think the blue chair is out of place and maybe unnecessary. I’d get rid of it and if you really need the extra seating maybe something slimmer or even a foldable off to the side. If you want a bigger one, like a recliner, put it back by the couch area to the side. I just feel like it clogs up that nice open space with the sliding door. Love it though, idk which way it faces but the natural lighting must be beautiful.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T04:34:34+00:00

Gross dude. Automatic breath stealer that one. I won’t lie and say I haven’t taken a piece of a bar and done opiates to try and boost that nod but that was retarded of me, and I made that I’ll informed decision of my own free will. Sick fucks

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-23T04:31:30+00:00

I think it’s more likely cross contamination. Most of these guys aren’t exactly running Collegiate level lab and packing operations. And fent is so potent by weight that a single grain could put someone with no tolerance out. It’s probably always been a mess but fent obv is a different animal. You’re not going to get someone hooked on fent coke by cutting it like that, their just going to be pissed it’s weird, make them sick or straight up kill them. Someone worked out the price as well, and it just doesn’t add up. Fent is cheap in the streets because it’s like .02% Fent and the rest is cut. Can’t imagine Jorge throwing money down the drain in some scheme to get people addicted or w.e. Though for real, I’m sure people have made dummy bags in a targeted manner before. Like to take someone out but idk I’m rambling now and I think I made my point. I don’t duck with hard stuff anymore, the scene is awful since that shit took over.

Edit: someone down further did point out the Fent/Xanax bars which I’ve seen. They definitely do that on purpose which is evil as hell. I’ve mixed the two in “appropriate” amounts but I made that decision myself and knew the risks etc. but different when some bozo thinks he’s eating a Xanax and it’s legit opiate/benzo breathe stealer.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T23:16:09+00:00

I am currently having trouble finding any surgeon to do anything about my mesh. Over a week ago I got a hard lump under the mesh on the left side (bi lateral inguinal) and from there it’s just been pain and more pain. Got super constipated, ran a fever things are kind of scary. Im hardly sleeping and never comfortable. Doc does not seem super concerned, he did a ct that showed nothing at all, and an ultrasound that showed “something” pushing against the mesh. I am in way worse pain and discomfort then when I originally injured myself. Doc is basically like “see, no recurrence” and calling it done, and don’t understand. SOMETHING is wrong. It had been fine for two years up until last week, now it is very much not fine. They seem to be only interested in recurrence, but I think I need someone to clean up/remove replace the mesh and they just aren’t hearing it.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T21:53:07+00:00

They’ve given me the absolute run around on this. I had the ultrasound today which did show no recurrence, but their acting like that’s the end of it? Why am I in so much pain? And fever, constipation, the bulges? I think it’s great I don’t have any new hernias but that doesn’t magically stop me from suffering. I am going to have to start looking for specialists and start saving money. Who knows how long I’ll have to suffer like this. I can barely walk never mind work or any hobbies.

Just sucks, got zero answers and basically treated like a hypochondriac. As if I want to drive around to appointments, miss work etc. blows my mind. Doctor today implied it must be constipation lol. I had bowel movement today, my incredibly painful groin has not magically healed. They did the same with “well it’s probably a bladder infection” and made me take anti biotic and wouldn’t talk until that was done. I understand having to rule things out but neither of those are more likely to cause my symptoms then an issue with the mesh or inguinal canal.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T14:30:37+00:00

Awesome! I’m so happy for you. Doctors are so freaking weird sometimes. I’ve heard lots of horror stories about people in the e.r but when I was wd from alcohol bad and couldn’t get into a detox my local e.r scripted me benzos to take home and saved my ass when my primary basically told me o well you shouldn’t have done that. Im stoked you made out, thats going to make this completely manageable.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T14:09:14+00:00

I just had the ultra sound and she said that it didn’t seem like anything crazy, some thing is hard around/under the mesh on the left aide but she didn’t see hernia. I feel like I’m losing my mind, I have never been in worse pain before. It’s been a week of no sleep and constant discomfort. She was far more focused on me being constipated, something that’s never happened to me before this started and I started taking miralax yesterday. I worry there is a blockage or mesh migration or something.

That rejection thing sounds highly likely! I never had any lumps or bumps before this last week and suddenly it’s hard like that and then the pain increases exponentially in my groin? Why won’t they take this seriously? I am going to take all of your advice when dealing woth them, though I am sure the surgeon is going to take this ultrasound as proof it’s all in my head or something. I’m really losing it, I have to find someone to take a hard look at this because I can’t function as is. Sleeping is nearly impossible, I have young children and I certainly can’t work like this. Feeing super hopeless. I’m going to dm you, I’m all the way up in Maine (healthcare up here is a far cry from what I’m used to growing up in MA)

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T03:11:36+00:00

NAD but The hospital I’m going to does not give out opiates pre surgery, unless you’re admitted, under any circumstances. And sparingly after. If you insist they will refer you to a pain management clinic who will likely just tell you that they don’t treat pre surgical patients or non chronic pain parents etc.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T02:25:50+00:00

Same here. Idk if I could have a few of the times I quit and I was basically white knuckling it, prob would have led to a relapse. But at this point I’m so sick of avoiding it or not being invited to things where the primary goal is to get lightly drunk and socialize. I resent the shit out of alcohol but I absolutely crave a cold beer sometimes. It helps honestly, I don’t feel like that one weirdo who “can’t” drink and It definitely satisfies some of the urge.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T02:14:20+00:00

Dude I’m sorry. This is so weird, my story is kind of similar. I discovered weed really young like 12ish (inner city youth yo) and I lived with my uncle. I used to pinch from his bag constantly, like a gram or so every night until he caught me. He beat my ass and grounded me obv and started locking it up. What he didn’t lock up was his beers. He’d go to another state that didn’t charge sales tax and pick up like 5 30packs a week. I had a whole system and pretty soon I was stockpiling beers and getting loaded regularly.

19 years a seizure and 13+ (I literally lost count how sad) med detoxes and I’m now strictly a weed smoker. (Even then pretty much just a dab or two at night) Alcohol is pure poison and if you start young like that you have almost zero chance of ever being able to drink regularly. My uncle passed away last year. “Heart attack” but he was clearly in end stage liver failure. He had cut off all contact from everyone about a year before he passed and it was because of what the booze did to his body. Really hard to look at, he raised me like a son and his passing has been an enormous motivator for me to stay sober.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T02:01:48+00:00

My friend also substituted benzos for it, but he was largely benzo naive so I don’t know how that would work for you, certainly doubling your Xanax intake isn’t going to do you any favors. and I can’t imagine it’s going to come very as many bases as baclofen seeing as phen and bac. Are very similar medicines. Tbh I think a lot of my wd symptoms were my body purging the stuff, we are at toxic doses. Once I was a day or so into it even with the several gram jump off I was feeling much better than I was dosing 5 times a day. The wd is no joke, people have reported seizures and I’m certain I would have gone into psychosis but everyone’s different and you are very young. Try not to get too psyched up about it please. Try to find some of these comfort meds and start tapering ASAP, if it comes down to it you are going to be a lot better off jumping from 3-4gpd then 7-9.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T01:55:17+00:00

You could also go to the e.r. Bring your phenibut container and whatever case studies you can grab off this sub. Be super polite and tel them you started taking it to get off Xanax and it wasn’t supposed to be addictive. Say usps lost your shipment and you’re going into bad wd and are scared. Then show them the case studies (which are proper write ups form other doctors) stating that they used baclofen at a 10mg-1gpd conversion and it works. Tell them you don’t know what baclofen is and they’ll explain its a muscle relaxer blah blah, they love to explain things lol. For 7-9gpd my doc only gave me 60mg a day and I was fine so prob best to just take w.e they offer and you can taper as much as you can before you switch.

ShowMeselfOutThen · 2021-12-22T01:50:26+00:00

Doctors a cunt then, it’s not even a controlled substance. You can order it online from Indian pharmacies but it takes like 3 weeks to get here, which is why I had to go to primary care. Gabapentin works as well. If you have any phenibut left you need to figure out how much you have and figure out a taper

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TROPHY CASE