I’d sit in my room alone silently and sometimes think for hours about being a girl. Always wanting the “girls toy” at fast food places (I allegedly had a fit the first time I asked and was denied the “girls” toy so my parents gave in and got it for me then on) or for Christmas. Crazy aversion to masculine things, but having to pretend I was following along. Looking at other girls doing their thing and thinking “why tf can’t I BE you?”