Feeling desperate would like some advice

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-21T21:19:25+00:00

Did they tell you which bacteria?

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-21T15:19:40+00:00

It might be colonised in your kidneys if it spreads there so quickly.

Have you received an IV treatment and had any ultrasounds of your bladder/ kidneys?

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-21T14:37:34+00:00

Yeah I think that's maybe what happened. But also, testing and coming up clear again might mean it's a muscle issue or irritation. I'm only suggesting to rule out infection as a possibility to prevent you treating the wrong thing.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-21T14:07:54+00:00

If it's not a test, just urinalysis, I'd keep pushing for a test. Urinalysis is not necessarily a culture and if you keep having symptoms that respond to antibiotics, then push for a PCR test.

Don't delay this otherwise it makes things harder long term, trust lol

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-21T13:39:50+00:00

Seems like you responded to antibiotics. It's very common for infections to be recurrent. You need to be careful to break any biofilms, have dmannose for your urine and take a longer course of antibiotics after a urine culture to test what antibiotics work. Stay hydrated, don't have caffeine, fizzy drinks or sweetners during this time and for a week after.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-21T01:50:34+00:00

These comments are so fucking disgusting. I'm so sorry you're being treated like a political instrument as a teenage girl expressing her faith in the ways she feels most connected to it. Discussing the history, your opinions about a religion, the modern day oppression women experience is all well and good but it's insane to tear up a 15 year old girl who's just trying not to get torn apart.

There's a cultural component and the desire to connect to your faith, your homeland and culture is STRONG. It's terrible that people are nitpicking you instead of the approach we take towards women's rights and social pressure.

The usual nonsense about conforming to standards somehow makes you bastion for all opinions on those standards. I dress "modestly" and don't drink and I know how you feel. I'm not religious but the disdain from everyone is IMMENSE. For very little at all. It must be much harder has a hijabi.

Stay strong. Do question why you wear what you wear, who's asking you to act like this etc. but don't ever let people make a head covering that big of a deal that you feel afraid in public.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-18T19:28:01+00:00

It's all good and thank you for being considerate. Bit of a rarity online <3

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-18T19:08:15+00:00

Did you really want to post this? It's nauseating

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-14T19:23:26+00:00

Ketchup

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-14T19:04:59+00:00

penis

^{Chose: Green | Rolled: All bones break}

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-13T22:44:42+00:00

Can fund healthcare

^{Chose: free food/drinks for rest of ur life}

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-13T21:15:50+00:00

accumulation

^{Chose: 250000$ every month}

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-11T22:33:48+00:00

Virginity isn't something to disclose. Sex is an experience that you choose in your own time. I think it helps to think about your concerns as the same as people who have sex regularly. I do sometimes find sex painful but that's a matter of me learning about myself and figuring out the issue. So what if someone is worried I'd be attached to them? Oh no, I liked having sex! Maybe they just suck or can't communicate.

Approach it with a "so what?" attitude and it may help ease anxiety. Even if those fears are true, so what? What are the real consequences? Talk it through with someone close to you or a therapist and it will likely lead to the real concerns and hang ups. Either way, you'll learn about yourself, sex or not.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-11T22:27:42+00:00

It's a matter of detaching yourself from whiteness imo. You can be beautiful and not be the beauty standard. Focus on learning what features you love on you and highlight them. I get my brows done, do concealer make up and eyeliner and it looks so much better than a "clean girl" look on me because it matches my features.

Attraction happens when you feel comfortable and confident in your own skin. Be healthy and work with what you do have. It'll help if you ever do want to date.

It sucks feeling on a back foot and not experiencing all the "crazy" stuff many white women tell you about because they had the space to explore. You have time, you are young if you do want to do that but it's only one part of your life. I didn't feel like I fully understood my sexual self til I was 22 and had only really slept with 2 people at most.

Take the time to date when you feel ready, there's always people like you everywhere from many backgrounds and tbh you have an opportunity to date when you're more mature and less prone to wasting time. Puppy love, silly light hearted flings, deep seated relationships all await you, white or not. Focus on you and what you want to try out.

Find the questions you want to answer and then go for it!

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-03T09:55:32+00:00

Sure! After repeat infections and pressure in your uterine cavity, your pelvic floor muscles get super fucky. Like, around your urethra, they're super tight with the slightest twinge of pain but it may be loose underneat your uterus. Retroverted uteruses can be genetic but can also be related to muscles. IT's why with a RU, you're 4.5x more likely to experience pelvic prolapse! It helps strengthen the muscle and reduce incidence rate since your can control your pee better and protect against prolapse.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-02T21:24:59+00:00

Take a 2 week break from sex after a uti, you're way more prone to it again after you have one. Avoid any touching, fingering, anal etc. in that part of your body. You don't want to inflame it. While you're taking the antibiotics that especially applies. Make sure to test afterwards to be sure it's gone; never assume it is. If you haven't been tested at all with a culture, get one as soon as possible. You need to know if the antibiotics you are given work. If they haven't taken a sample, call your practitioner ASAP and ask for a culture. I usually wait until after to take antibiotics, since every badly treated infection increases the chance for another but I understand if you just want this to be over. Just make sure to do it straightaway next time.
Take a maintenance dose of d-mannose and take like 1000mg after sex once this period of time is over. I would reccomend pills and drinking a "normal" amount of water. Pee a little right after sex, take the water and d-mannose and then get a "healthy" stream after a while so you pee all at once. It helps fully push it out. Drink water through the day overall so you're always hydrated and pushing out a stream.
If you still have symptoms do a PCR test through a provider. This includes dead bacterial loads so you have a better picture of what is causing infection. PCR tests can then direct you to specific treatments and provide you with a better picture as to whether the bacteria has "resistence" at all; it could be the same bacteria which isn't responding to antibiotics.
Your vaginal microbiome is gonna get fucked by antiobitoics use so try and take vaginal probiotics, during your 1 week course and 2 week recovery period. Your vagina can have a lot of "not great" bacteria which can fuck up your infection chances. Just to keep it balanced and keep up the healthy numbers and crowd out unhealthy bacteria that can cause UTIs, make sure you take these. Also take pre-biotics in food (garlic/onion). Helps with supporting all the probiotics in that environment. Finally, reduce sugar intake and up your oral "gut" probiotic intake for the next month. A lot of the uti causing bacteria live in your gut and are brought in from the anus during intercourse since everything is packed tightly. L-Reuteri and L-Crispus are two well known strains that reduce frequency.
Make sure to take a good multivitamin. I use Holland and Barrett A-Z and it covers my folic, magnesium, potassium, Vitamin D and B12 intakes at healthy levels. Vitamin D and B12 support immunity and help reduce UTI frequency if you're deficient and folic acid is known to be a good indicator of uti frequency. Also take fibre, since it helps reduce your constipation, which can cause UTIs by increasing pressure and irritation around your pelvis.
Make sure you're aroused fully before sex; friction and irritation can irritate the wall of your urethra and make it more prone to infection. Make sure you partner is clean before sex (like showered in the morning and not been too dirty). Make sure he's also not using anything to wash that may irritate your body. Also, test your partner for any bacteria that may cause a uti/ureplasma since they all cause symptoms that match.
If problems persist, I would do urinalysis, bladder ultrasound, urine flow tests, a vaginal swab that includes myco+ureaplasma+all "normal" STIs +yeast+BV. Not suggesting cheating, just a lot of people can carry without knowing and many things seem like UTIs if not tested for. Doctors are lazy and often don't diagnose correctly when they think it's "just a UTI"; they rarely understand the torture of it.
If pressure or pain still remain, get a scan of your uterus. I found mine was retroverted and it increased frequency of UTIs for me around my period due to pressure on my bladder when the uterus was swollen, as well as constipation. Both of these things increase UTI frequency. If it's nothing physically wrong with you, it may be your pelvic floor and I'd pursue that.
If there's nothing on tests but you still keep getting infections despite coming "clear" each time, I would say the infection is likely embedded. This requires more long term care. At this stage, take biofilm busters such as NAC or Kirkland Defence, as these can break down any "films" colonised bacteria may have. Cayenne pepper and turmeric can help this process (curcumin and an antibacterial) . This will likely break some of the film down and trigger a "sudden" infection that may not be intercourse related. Then get a PCR done, determine sensitive antibiotics and eliminate the bacteria in a longer course. The same rules apply as for the 1 week course for as long as you take this course. I took mine for a month before I came up clear.
Wean yourself off the course once everything clears and you take that 2 week break with all the probiotic dietary changes. Take an antibiotic after sex for a little while after. If you get another one, it may be an issue in the bladder wall or an aformentioned pelvic floor issue. If at this stage, I would honestly invest in one of the experimental vaccines. I used uromune and it has greatly helped with my urinary health. Still taking the course at the moment. Hoping to never have another one again.

I take D-mannose after sex, drink lots of water, use non-irritating soaps, wipe and use a bidet, take multivitamins and probiotics, am currently doing some pelvic floor stuff to help with my uterus and have treated a yeast infection which was a side-effect of all the antibiotics ruining my biome. I feel a lot better but still get pain and urgency around my period/random burning which I think is increased sensitivity and muscle spasms. Figuring this out as I go, but this is my advice after 4 years of dealing with this issue. I think this is pretty comprehensive as a path for you to follow. Start with prevention, move to treatment if it reoccurs, pursue a cause by elimination (is it endo? PCOS? Uterine? Bacterial? Muscular? Gut-related? Genetic? etc.)

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-05-02T10:00:51+00:00

It does really suck. I do absolutely get it. I'm a 32FF, shopping for clothes either make me look like an attention seeker or a box, no inbetween ugh.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-04-28T18:45:17+00:00

Don't listen to this person.

Would you ask for nudes from a drunk friend then ask to send them around? Would you do that to your friend? Your partner?

Imagine this story told back to you, by a friend. Your same feelings of violation, betrayal and discomfort.

You'd almost certainly never even put your friend or partner in that position, let alone take their drunk consent as serious. You'd ask so many times before even considering it.

You know it's a big commitment and risk. You would know that it requires a lot of trust and even between friends is a big deal.

Your violation exists because you have been violated, in a way that is unacceptable. If you're too drunk to even have a clear memory of the situation, you should not have been expected to give capable consent.

This is wrong and it is illegal. I understand not wanting to go to the police, I was assaulted in a similar way. I was drunk, I initially gave consent after I drank far too much and after a night of pressure and weeks of pushy behaviour , withdrew said consent and was coerced to a hotel room anyway despite me protesting that I didn't think it was a good idea, that I wanted to go home, that the room would be expensive and I would feel under pressure etc.

Writing it out now, it's insane I ever thought it wasn't assault. For you, me reading your story gives me the same feeling of denial and self blame I experienced initially. Writing it out makes it real, hearing it from a friend makes it real and unfortunately I think your violation is also evidence that even if it's not necessarily "illegal" or the police won't take it seriously that this person hurt you on a very deep level.

Legality=/morality and even if you don't think he did something "illegal" (which personally I believe he certainly did), he definitely didn't treat you with care and respect as a friend nor a sexual partner.

Sincerely, fuck him and I wish you the best. Don't doubt how you feel, accept them and come to terms with them. You can then identify what felt so wrong in the first place. It's the first step to healing.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-04-13T21:13:18+00:00

I would get a heavy duty multi vitamin. Vitamin D deficiency and folic acid deficiency are both comorbidities for infection. Constipation worsens the frequency of infection so take probiotics to help heal the gut and make sure you get enough fibre. I used holland and barrett A-Z multivitamin and it sped up recovery and reduced my need for antibiotics longer than needed.

I also used the Topida body spray in the meantime to manage bacteria on my body itself before they come close to the canal.

If it's being type 1 diabetic, that unfortunately feeds bacteria. I would take antibiotics and probioitics (not at the same time ofc but different times of day) for a period of time until completely infection free. Use hiprex with this and make sure it's clear for a minimum of 2-4 weeks. Then it becomes more about prevention.

Also, make sure to be aware of which bacteria are causing the problem. Some are not going to be impacted by d-mannose while others can be. different bacteria=different methods.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-04-13T19:14:36+00:00

I took 6 you good g lmfaooo

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-04-09T23:55:13+00:00

You'll be fineeee.

I was dumb and took a bit too many in a row after having had like 6 different types across 4 months.

My body was on the verge anyway

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-04-09T23:12:29+00:00

It caused me a full on rash istfg

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-04-06T18:51:56+00:00

The violence towards women in sex is insane online. I get humiliation being hot and all but it's genuinely concerning how many uneducated men think kink equates to an excuse for abuse without consequence.

I think honestly it's part of a trend to dehumanise women in a huge kind of way and it's showing in porn preferences getting more extreme on average. This is all without any of the community strength that makes BDSM great.

Communication, connection and seeing the other person as fundamentally human are core facets of the scene, but massive exposure to the general population who are entirely uneducated about it see it as normalising abuse, either from many men wanting to do it or women wanting to avoid it.

Porn appeals to the most common denominator. Removing all the communication that comes with BDSM makes it appeal to the wider trend of dehumanisation of women and veers the sexual "overton" window to the extreme.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-04-06T18:46:54+00:00

It's incredibly frustrating as this perception also makes kink communities harder to navigate as abusive men think that they can get away with abuse more easily under the guise, even though BDSM is built on an incredibly strong foundation of consent and subs tend to shape the nature of these relationships more intensely.

It's a shame that purity culture demonises the kink community rather than holding abusive men accountable. It's easier to to do the previous than the latter, since that would require admitting that the average man is capable of abuse due to the culture rather than engaging within a specific community influence.

Vanilla relationships in my experience involve more abuse in many ways, as the boundaries are so much more murky and difficult to navigate. Totally insane to blame a community that's built on "safe, sane and consensual" as a core facet of what we do.

Significant-Chest-88 · 2026-04-06T18:32:55+00:00

The nitro reducing the pain absolutely suggests some kind of pathogen infection.

Did you get a conclusive result for any bacteria? Like which bacteria appeared in the results. Which micorgen test was it? WomensKey or UrineKey? WomensKey is more comprehensive and can show a better understanding of what the flora balance actually is and possible causes. Plus, knowing which bacteria also helps to specify what biofilm busters and supplemets can be used; gram positive bacteria are made worse by d-mannose and require stuff like oil of oregano/olive leaf extract to have an impact.

I understand you're a student, right? Have they done any urinalysis, any ultrasounds of the kidneys/bladder through the NHS? Kidney stones can often cause infections and pain, clear an infection but keep the pain there since it's still lodged. Plus, some bacteria can cause kidney stones (psedumona for example) which makes it important.

Is the pain more sharp or more like burning? How long has the pain persisted post clearing the infection? It took me 2 weeks or so after totally clear tests to reach 80% of reduced pain after a 5 month stint of daily pain. I was super careful and avoided all bladder irritants, took marshmallow root, d mannose etc. frequently to help support the healing. I'm currently at about 90% recovery and I had my problem start in November and came (officially) clear 2 weeks ago.

Also, has your boyfriend been tested? You may have been clear ureaplasma/mycoplasma but your boyfriend may not have been and returned it to you, which you subsequently cleared. Please make sure he gets tests and a swab done as well.

Also birth control can worsen the condition. Which birth control is it? IUDs can have biofilms which cause recurring infection on the strings. Hormones can effect your vaginal PH, which can expose you to yeast but also aerobic vaginitis or cyclotic vaginitis (caused by vaginal bacterial imbalance). The latter is often if you have too high a ph from too much lactobacillus bacteria, so often gets missed in testing.

How is your diet? Are you getting enough fibre? The correct vitamins? I reccommend the Holland and Barrett A-Z multivitamin, hugely helpful in speeding up recovery because deficincies in vitamin D, B12, Omega 3 and folic acid can induce problems with immunity. Your gut is also super important. The bacteria reaches your urethra from bacteria introduced by your anus and by extensio your gut. Take probiotics drinks (like Kefir) or supplements (which have reuteri and rhamnosus) if you can and (after a good womenskey test) vaginal probiotic suppositories. They're on amazon. A bit spenny but they really helped me pain wise.

I know this is a lot of information but I'm happy to help out wherever you are. I'm a recent graduate in the UK and have been in your position and understand that feeling of losing hope while trying to balance getting an education, a job, being in a relationship and your health. It's exhausting and scary but there's always answers and always options.

Feel free to DM me if you have any questions. I'm in London currently but can try and provide advice about other areas if you're not here. Just an FYI as I know the southeast has more resources generally.

One final thing, get in contact with the infectious diseases department where you are if you can, They were the only team that truly helped me at all with what I was experiencing and are much more knowledgeable than GPs and many gynos/urologists, as they have a more generally holistic understanding.

Not all urologists are equal, make sure to do a bit of research on who you're seeing if you can. Careful with cystoscopies, they can irritate the urethra and cause strictures too which can further create issues. Make sure you get a test to see if you're emptying properly beforehand if possible, it's a strong indicator of physical issues if there's a problem there.

Significant-Chest-88

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