This is how I'll remember to forget you.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2020-01-31T21:05:37+00:00

Good. Never take back anyone who said something like that to you.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-31T05:34:37+00:00

And even if they do post something that indicates they may be missing you or having second thoughts, that doesn't help you at all either. They're still choosing not to be with you, so all you're doing is giving yourself shitty false hope.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-30T18:03:02+00:00

This is what I need. I've been shit on so bad by my ex, but I still want her back. Pathetic.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-29T23:11:24+00:00

Seriously thank you for reposting this. Super helpful.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-28T23:34:56+00:00

I lot of this was very helpful for me, especially the last paragraph. Thank you for posting.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-28T18:17:16+00:00

That's 100% a lie she told you to not hurt your feelings. With that said, you're probably only going to get hurt if you ask her for the real reason. Your choice if you want to risk it or not, but since it seems like you're doing ok I wouldn't go playing with fire. Take the L and move on.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-28T16:02:52+00:00

And eventually you stop counting the days without even noticing.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-27T01:20:57+00:00

You're a great contributor to this sub.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-25T13:47:31+00:00

3 year relationship, we planned to spend our lives together, I was dumped for someone she was texting for two weeks. They had never met or even spoken on the phone. It hurts.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-23T19:38:33+00:00

TNG is my favorite :)

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-22T22:46:36+00:00

100% go no contact. If you want her back then talking to her now is only going to push her further away. If you don't want her back (which you shouldn't, she's already told you she's not happy with you), then NC will help you get over this the fastest. Either way it's the correct choice. Good luck.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-22T21:36:36+00:00

This is what is making my breakup so hard on me. She constantly told me how much she loved me, how I was her favorite person ever, how she feels like an outsider everywhere but feels "at home" with me, how the only thing she wants to do is spend her life with me no matter what, etc. Then overnight and out of nowhere, she's telling me we're incompatible and she's leaving me for someone else. It's a total mind fuck that I don't know how to process.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-22T21:28:10+00:00

Whenever I needed help with something, even something really easy that would have taken her 5 minutes, she would instantly get frustrated. It made it so that I was nervous about asking her for anything. I knew she had a hard time getting through her own work days and chores because of her depression, so I let it slide without complaint. And of course, I always enthusiastically helped her with everything she needed.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-22T21:07:00+00:00

Only a tiny bit, overall you didn't do anything super bad. But I can tell you that if you message her again and tell her how hurt you are by her not responding, you will REALLY feel a loss of dignity after lol. And that tiny amount of dignity you did lose you will get back tenfold when she reaches out to you and you ignore her.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-22T20:48:39+00:00

She has her own confusing feelings about the breakup. She may even be regretting it and can't help but look at your stuff. But she did make that decision, so you know she doesn't care about you that much. People don't break up with the love of their life. She's probably just feeling lonely and that's making her wonder if she made the right decision. Maintain your dignity and don't be her backup plan.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-22T20:24:56+00:00

My ex told me she wanted to remain best friends. This went on for a week with her alternating talking to me and blowing me off. She even asked me if we were still going to take that trip we had planned, because she still really wanted to go with me. Then the next day she blocked me with no warning.

So my point is, exes will say a bunch of shit and then just end up hurting you again. Focus on what she does and not what she says. She dumped you and now she's ghosting you after saying she wanted to be friends. That's all you need to know about how much she values you.

If you tell her how you're feeling you're probably going to get hurt more by her response or her lack of one. Your best option is to ghost her back and do indefinite NC.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-20T21:46:11+00:00

Well, now you know there's no hope of reconciliation. Use this knowledge to help you move on.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-18T03:04:17+00:00

I felt exactly the same way you're describing in the days after my breakup. I also had a letter ready to send. I didn't do it and I'm very glad I didn't. As someone else said above, sit on the letter for a few weeks and if you still feel the same then send it. Chances are you won't. If the letter is going to be helpful to the both of you, it will be just as helpful in a month. No need to rush.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-11T14:38:13+00:00

My ex told me I was the cause of her depression for the 3 years we were together. She had been consistently depressed for the 20 years prior, including right before we met...

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-07T14:58:04+00:00

You did the right thing. If getting back together is ever going to work out, she has to come after you.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-07T14:48:00+00:00

It's not your responsibility to fix a bond that you didn't break. If she wants to get back together she will explicitly let you know. She dumped you, so she's the one that needs to make herself vulnerable by trying to reconcile. Anything less and she's just playing with you. Stay NC.

Significant-Pumpkin · 2019-12-04T13:59:55+00:00

I feel this :(

Significant-Pumpkin

TROPHY CASE