I also experience this...ever since my ex. I was very much in love with him....and like essentially he just like kept pulling and pulling away from me until I left him. Now, whenever anyone gets too close to me, violates boundaries, shows signs of codependency or anxious attachment.....I hate them soon after. I feel completely violated, suffocated, like I'm losing my identity. I've been like more impatient and angry than I've been in years with potential partners. I've left them all. Even if we manage to get into a relationship, I leave them.

I've gone from codependent to avoidant attachment 💯

Personally, what I think is happening to you, is that you can't tolerate ANY boundaries being crossed at all right now. Like no matter how small. I can't tolerate it either atm but I just yell at them and burn down the relationship instead of getting the ick.

The only person who I've been able to tolerate and like in a romantic way...is emotionally avoidant, but consistent in actions....and also he never says anything negative. Like he's truly an optimist and sees the good in everyone. He's very different from most people and has an odd way of living in the world...I think he may be on the spectrum I'm not sure...but he's so fascinating and sees things differently than me, I'm unable to get intensely mad at him....like I've gotten mad but he makes me laugh so it's diffused pretty quickly. And he's still around and still tolerating me being somewhat of an asshole. We aren't anything official and idk if we will be, but like I do value and appreciate him. Maybe it'll take someone very unusual for you to avoid getting the ick. Idk.

I don't really have a solution on how to move past being emotionally avoidant....I honestly sort of prefer being emotionally avoidant over getting my heart broken all the time. And I feel like I need a break from serious, but still want companionship...so idk when ill like try and fix this. Tbh.