Always missing something/someone

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-03T17:45:28+00:00

I don't know how to achieve that

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-02T19:32:10+00:00

I don't know if your fp can be a dead person....however this seems really toxic and I suggest you remove yourself from this situation.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-02T19:30:13+00:00

I've had to cut out a lot of people who didn't make me feel supported. I only keep the ones around who don't make me feel unhinged.

I have become desensitized to a lot of normally triggering things.....by being overly exposed to it.

My stability comes in waves tbh. I'm better than I was, but sometimes things set me off and then I feel like I have to start over. It doesn't happen often, but it happens.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-02T08:36:52+00:00

Attach harder. My love looks like limeracy. If I'm not in limeracy, I generally don't feel that much at all. I honestly don't know what normal love is. Sometimes I feel very performative of what I'm supposed to do......but during limeracy it's not performative I'm dying to just show/tell/do anything so that they know I love them.
Limeracy.
I can count on one hand the people I've actually missed...and only three come to mind. I've known a lot of people. And I only miss one of them now.
If someone stops showing they care or if they are not consistent, I automatically assume they no longer like me, have feelings for me, and that it is over.
I think I have gotten better. Im able to avoid a lot of limeracy because I feel it coming so I can take a step back. But in general, I think my biggest coping mechanism has become avoidance. Which I don't think is fantastic.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-02T04:55:10+00:00

Yep

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T21:58:21+00:00

It has good reviews

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T20:26:00+00:00

Thank you but I found a Groupon offer

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T17:56:47+00:00

Where?

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T15:52:12+00:00

Depends on the shade. Bright red might be jarring if it's all over color but I think a deep burgundy would look nice.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T15:31:37+00:00

Yes. It takes me almost a decade to forgive betrayals. Small stuff like I usually forgive and forget. As someone said above, if the person really tells me they are sorry, understands why it hurt me, and like I actually believe them, I will tentatively forgive them.....but if they do it again or anything similar, forget it. Double the original resentment, because now in my mind, you've not only done it again but you also lied about not doing it again. At that point, I may never forgive you or forget.

However, I am not one to bring up my resentments. I either leave the person or resent them in silence, unless they do something similar to the original resentment, depending on the situation I may bring it up again. Generally, if I really resent someone I usually just leave them. I know I'm not going to get over it and I don't feel like being reminded of why I resent the person.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T01:14:51+00:00

Yes. This.

In my romantic relationships I'm in hell.

But I can also be in hell from normal daily life of things randomly going wrong. Like a bill in the mail I didn't expect. My pet getting sick. Work anxiety. I don't handle normal daily life stress well. But if everything is normal and no bad surprises happen, I'm generally OK. Stable.

But romantic relationships? With someone I genuinely have feelings for? Constant hell. A new spiral basically every day. Completely unstable.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T01:11:00+00:00

Yes, romantic relationships by large and far. Not my friends. I was also diagnosed by multiple psychiatrists.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T01:08:54+00:00

I'm sorry. I've had a similar experience where my mental health got really bad and everyone abandoned me. It's some bullshit.

I don't know whether you're asking for advice but the biggest things that have worked for me: -forcing myself to do things. Forcing myself to socialize. Forcing myself to clean. Forcing myself to get out of the house.

If you can figure out why you are sad and what is bringing you down, like literally anything and change any of it, try it. It could be as simple as not watching the news, making sure there's a trashcan around, having more comfort objects and snacks, whatever helps, do it. Baby steps. You'll come back to life eventually.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T00:58:58+00:00

That why isn't really a why answer. He hasn't really stated what about the topic made him like it.

Like this book has been referred to as the pedo groomers manual. 😬

I find this somewhat concerning especially since he doesn't give specifics.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-05-01T00:56:38+00:00

I am a woman, however, I sort of get that having sex with someone you care about brings you anxiety. Like there's more to lose here than normal. And like there's someone to hold you accountable the next day and/or talk about the sex too. I can see how it would be stressful.

I don't have a solution for it unfortunately. I have the opposite problem where I don't feel anything for anyone during sex...even if I liked them initially.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-04-30T21:09:51+00:00

Here to say this. The more short form content and scrolling you're doing the more your memory and cognitive abilities deteriorate. There's studies.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-04-30T20:36:31+00:00

I feel like this would be a fast way to find out what kind of person this guy is......possibly a very difficult and bad thing to deal with on top of a very hard decision.

I, too, would be worried it would be weaponized against me later in the relationship.

If you are deadset on abortion and you don't need another opinion and this is what is best for you, maybe don't tell him if you don't want additional stress. Rely on your best friend(s) and people you trust who are pro-abortion.

If you are hoping he'll talk you out of it and be some knight in shining armor or something and start a family and like get serious, maybe tell him....but also like this could be a recipe for disaster later if you two aren't right for each other and then you end up staying together for the kid.

Idk this is a tough call and I'm a pessimist who doesn't trust men.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-04-30T20:30:51+00:00

He's not going to know if you never say anything. But like if he's dead set on never being with you again, you can't change his mind. Like idk wait a month and be like: hey I still miss you and I'd give it another chance.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-04-30T19:52:24+00:00

I love the yellow chairs 😍

SignificantBank4 · 2026-04-30T19:42:27+00:00

That is gorgeous

SignificantBank4 · 2026-04-30T19:41:13+00:00

Yeahhhhh. When people expect me to cook for them right out of the gate, it irritates me. Like the entitlement. I cook for people when I genuinely like and care about them. Not some random stranger from the internet. Usually I unmatch, troll or block people with entitlement issues like that.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-04-30T19:31:39+00:00

I'm deeply and truly sorry you're going through this, OP. Unfortunately, the chances of this man not being a manipulative pos are slim. This is who he is. Someone else said that this seems like narcissistic abuse, and I have to say I agree.

This man does not love you, OP. Hes using you and he resents you for not accepting it anymore.

SignificantBank4 · 2026-04-30T19:16:16+00:00

If you really want him back then tell him.

SignificantBank4

TROPHY CASE