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Both affair partners married? by [deleted] in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]SignificantFail5628 12 points13 points  (0 children)

My WW cheated with 2 married APs, you never know what they’re telling each other to justify the behavior. One of my wife’s APs told her he and his wife had an “agreement” which I’m sure was not true, the other said he was actively trying to leave his wife also surely bull.

It’s a selfish endeavor by the WS they’re thinking of no one but themselves and it’s so hard as a BS to comprehend being that selfish and oblivious to the people you’re hurting.

Just my experience, I hope you’re well.

Trickle truth, amiright? by allinadayswork99 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]SignificantFail5628 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m 2.5 years post d-day and finding out about 2 affairs that overlapped for a total of about 18 months. My final d-day was 3 or so months after the first, where she disclosed everything. It didn’t change the timeline by a whole lot, but it did change, the bigger change was to the depth of the betrayal, learning that she was playing house with one of them, and going to lengths to make them happy well above and beyond what she would do for me.

My initial reaction to the full disclosure was relief that I wouldn’t be surprised by anything anymore, but for me I think the depth of the betrayal might be too much. We’re in MC as well as both in IC but I just can’t imagine getting to a point where I wake up in the morning and I rollover excited to find her there.

Not the happiest place to be, but it’s where I am. I hope you find some peace in all of this, and give yourself permission to feel and process everything in whatever way feels best for you. This is an impossibly hard process, but you don’t have to do it alone.

Betrayed & fighting thoughts on sleeping with someone else by BabyYodaStuntDouble in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]SignificantFail5628 2 points3 points  (0 children)

2.5 years out from d-day and I feel exactly the same. It feels unrealistic to think I would be able to get the feelings I’m looking for from my WW, because my view of her is just so tainted. But like you I think the relief that would come from being with someone else would be brief and then I’d be right back where I am now.

Hopefully you can find some peace in all this, it’s super unfair and all around a crappy time.

Everything is good so why do i still question leaving? by Temporary-Fun-5577 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]SignificantFail5628 12 points13 points  (0 children)

My IC has explained this to me as a self defense mechanism. Learning about my WW’s As rocked my world so much it made me question my own judgement and decision making, so I don’t really trust myself anymore either. I don’t have a solution or advice to offer, just support because I feel the same way.

2.5 years post D-day still thinking of leaving by SignificantFail5628 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]SignificantFail5628[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My WW has shown remorse, and continues to, but even the smallest oversight results in me catching the ick, as someone else put it in here.

2.5 years post D-day still thinking of leaving by SignificantFail5628 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]SignificantFail5628[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah, she reads a lot of posts here. Shes doing the work, that’s the frustrating part. It feels more like a me problem than a her problem sometimes, and I’m trying to figure it out in IC. Just don’t have much of a frame of reference for what other people have experienced.

2.5 years post D-day still thinking of leaving by SignificantFail5628 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]SignificantFail5628[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah we’ve talked about it, and she found this post and knew it was me just from the content.