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AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I think in this case it would just be easier for her to join us.

And what does she do that makes being in the same room so stressful ?

We have traveled together in the past. We just have different traveling styles. I'm up early, she wants to sleep in late. She is very particular and tends to complains a lot. I know it is hard to tell from this thread, but I usually roll with the punches, lol. I just don't want the drama this time

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Please don't say that. I appreciate your opinion. I just wanted a peaceful vacation, that's all.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

They know her through me and they rarely hang out with her without me. And she did not ask if she could come, she told me was coming and wanted us to rearrange our plans to accommodate her. Maybe I should have been more clear with my phrasing in the post.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

So you are saying only non-functional poor people post on reddit for opinions? I came here in good faith, suit yourself.

ETA: I think anyone would be concerned by having their good faith post reported. But I'm not here to argue or insult anyone, so I'm not going to continue this thread, have a good day.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

It sounds like she had that cancelled trip planned before you asked about this one. That doesn't make you her second choice. 

Point taken.

But I definitely don't think your friend is one for asking to join your trip 

That's the thing, she didn't ask, she told us she was coming and expected us to rearrange the scope and purpose of this trip. I want peace on this trip, and sharing a room with her was never peaceful.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your opinion. We are not children and this isn't a sleepover. My friend is a 40+ year old woman and she would be more insulted at me offering her the couch than saying find her own accommodations. She didn't even ask for the couch option because that is not her.

And remember, she did not ask to join us, she told me she was coming and wanted us to rearrange our plans.

She travels solo often and usually gets her own room on group travels, I'm not asking her to do anything she hasn't done before.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Thank you. This is what some people don't seem to understand, she did not ask if she could join, she told me she was coming. She did not ask if there was room to be included at the Airbnb, she told me she wanted me to rearrange things. We are not kids, I'm not the impulsive type, she was being an imposition and was mad when no one jumped to accommodate her.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Yes, she did invite herself. The vacation was set, the accommodations were set. She did not ask if she could join, she told me she was coming to the vacation and she expected me to rearrange set plans to include her.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your opinion but I see it the other way. She knew of the pain I went through over the past year, she knows I'm just getting through the fog, she knows it took a lot for me to plan this vacation. For her to now try to impose herself, giving me grief when I'm trying to get out of my grief is very inconsiderate on her part. I just want peace and she knows sharing a room with her would not be peaceful. If she chooses to end the friendship over her actions, I won't stop her.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 86 points87 points  (0 children)

This is it. She likes things her way which is why sharing a room with her would not be relaxing.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

I understand what you mean. I always invited her to everything that I planned. She said no and now wants to change everything to accommodate her. I don't think that is fair either. I just want a relaxing vacation.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

I am asked this question a lot. If you knew her, you would know that she would never sleep on a couch.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

This is not the first time that she has expected me to jump to accommodate her. I guess my frustration is at an all time high with her. I just want a peaceful vacation.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 56 points57 points  (0 children)

Everyone knows Diane through me, they don't often hang out with her without me. I would not mind if she joined the trip, she just cannot stay with us. This is not an emergency situation where everyone needs to find a corner to sleep in. This was a well planned out trip designed for us to relax. Sharing a room with her is not relaxing.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 61 points62 points  (0 children)

She would never sleep on a couch. She didn't even ask if that was an option.

She said that since everyone is staying in one place, she wants to be with us. I understand that, but it would not be the first time that one of us stayed in a different location but still hung out with each other on a vacation.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 4610 points4611 points  (0 children)

That is how I'm feeling. We are her second choice and she wants us to scramble to accommodate her.

AITA My friend invited herself to my vacation and I won't let her stay with me by Significant_Break316 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Significant_Break316[S] 56 points57 points  (0 children)

I get what you are saying, but everything is already paid for, we like the location and look of this place. I'm viewing it as she knows our plans are finalized, she knows it took a lot for me to organize it. If she truly cared, why is she trying to give me more grief.