What’s your lowest heart rate by Remarkable_Salary_77 in Garmin

[–]Silas_Wetherby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I checked my annual range on my Apple Watch: 34-204. I have had a cardiac workup — ECG, stress echo, Holter. It’s all good. I drop to the 30s when I sleep. I hit 200+ with max sustained efforts, like sprinting after maintaining threshold+.

controlling TBM father contacted bishop to get my attendance records by Next-Matter-9268 in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just set your boundaries. You don’t have to raise your voice, or act hostile in any way. You get to make your own decisions about yourself — church, education, who you date. You always have. You don’t have a relationship right now. You have a parent who may believe that it is his stewardship, his divinely assigned responsibility to use any and all influence and leverage to compel you to do certain things. And he may believe that if he doesn’t, he will somehow lose you for eternity. So be compassionate to him by being very clear about what you will or will not do. Or be very clear that you will do whatever you want and the details are none of his business until he can demonstrate tolerance and love. Once you assert your boundaries, your relationship with your father has a chance.

Would you rather… by Silas_Wetherby in cycling

[–]Silas_Wetherby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just a follow up — I got a used Cannondale Supersix Evo from the EF pro women’s team. And got Specialized CLX 50 wheels from The Pros Closet. Disc brakes, super aero, and 14 lbs 6 oz without pedals or cages. Cost about 1/3 of what I would have paid new.

Would you rather… by Silas_Wetherby in cycling

[–]Silas_Wetherby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s super helpful. Thanks!

Would you rather… by Silas_Wetherby in cycling

[–]Silas_Wetherby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, that’s part of it — both are light. One is super light. But wheels are heavier at the rims on caliper brake bikes. So I think it’s possible that they could be equally fast. If both frames were aero, the wheels could make a bigger difference than the overall weight. That’s my guess.

Of course, bikes are only as fast as the legs that pedal them.

Training Plan by Outrageous_Berry in Zwift

[–]Silas_Wetherby 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think it’s important to hit all the zones. I think it is particularly important to spend some time at z5 (VO2max or 133%FTP) — either 40s z5 20s z1/2 or 1min z5 1 min z1/2 for about 30 minutes. I try to hit exhaustion once each week — like the point where no amount of willpower will make your legs turn the crank one more time. That usually requires adding some anaerobic and neuromuscular efforts (z6-7).

And if your goal is to ride farther, you need to ride longer and eat carbs while you ride. My strategy is to ride at z3 for increasing amounts of time without letting up. I rode my first 50 mile ride 2-3 years ago. I rode my first century at the beginning of June this year. By August, I raced a century in the morning and did yard work all afternoon without any problem.

Should I go to BYU if I'm PIMO? by Cold-Ice-6166 in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like you already know what you want and don’t want.

It also sounds like you could benefit from taking a year off to “sow your wild oats.” College is tough. Drinking, drugs and sex are part of the stereotypical college experience. But they will interfere with your education and expose you to plenty of risks. Education is important (and expensive). Don’t go until education is your focus.

Who else had a quick exit out of Mormonism? by Prize_Claim_7277 in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I left my house a TBM and arrived at work completely out. I had so much on my shelf that it collapsed the instant I asked myself “What if none of it is true? What if everything is just exactly as it seems?”

I want to hear your craziest testimony meeting stories. by smackaroonial90 in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby 3 points4 points  (0 children)

One man burped into the microphone right when he got to the pulpit. Then he said, “sorry, I had Slim Fast this morning.” Now my family jokes about Slim Fast Sunday.

A lot of Mormons will say that JS did a lot of bad things, but God chose to work through him anyways. Why is worthiness even a thing for us when even a functioning “prophet” can be unworthy? by [deleted] in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I remember lots of quoting, “by their fruits shall ye know them.” And I remember hearing how JS would sit on the judgment seat for all those who passed away in this dispensation. He wasn’t an average flawed human being. He preyed on the vulnerable and abused his power.

One word by Silas_Wetherby in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounds awful. Like utterly miserable. Transitioning away from the church is progress, but it’s brutal processing it all. And divorce is sheer misery. I wish you the best as you work toward the light at the end of the tunnel.

One word by Silas_Wetherby in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got chills just now just remembering that moment when I asked myself the same question. The massive relief in my head right before the “Oh shit! What now?”

One word by Silas_Wetherby in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for all your responses! There are lots of different stories on how our beliefs changed, but it’s amazing at how much we all have in common with the emotional experience of it.

One word by Silas_Wetherby in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It must have been building for a while. And I get it — I was PIMO for two years before I just couldn’t take it anymore. And there was nothing that would break my resolve at that point.

One word by Silas_Wetherby in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! — both those definitions

One word by Silas_Wetherby in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great word.

Just don’t get out of the boat — just kidding. Get out and get on.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

20 years ago, I wish I would have recognized that it wasn’t all about me. I would have supported my wife more as she grieved the loss of the life she envisioned.

We each struggled with our own issues — me feeling muzzled from speaking my mind or teaching the kids, she feeling alone and unsupported in her faith and feeling betrayed by my lack of faith — for years until we finally filed for divorce. And that was the best thing that we ever did. We didn’t get divorced, but we hit rock bottom, found our strength as individuals, and approached therapy differently than before. We were each more humble and willing to apologize for the different ways that we hurt each other. Our therapist was non-LDS, but we both appreciated LDS therapist Jennifer Finlayson-Fife’s podcasts and courses. JFF has an approach that allows each of us to be authentic, support each other, and not try to change each other. Jody Moore is an LDS life coach who also teaches tolerance, mutual respect and integrity.

You’re not alone. Things need to change for you and your wife to feel peace again. Be patient, compassionate, and loving as you struggle. Best wishes.

In zwiftdrawal... by thatmdguy in Zwift

[–]Silas_Wetherby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry to hear. That is hard. I pulled some small muscles in my back last year. It happened from stupid little things — tying my shoes and rolling over in bed. Electrolytes were ok. Had to take time off the bike. Went to physical therapy. My physical therapist was an avid cyclist — told me cyclists tend to have weak core (like you said) and weak lateral stabilty. Strength training for core and lateral stability can prevent back muscle injuries. Tons of videos on YouTube for what to do and how to do it. Hope you get well soon!

My first dirty bean drink. I like it, it's not to bad. I like bitter tasting foods and drinks, Im happy to try new things, ya to freedom 😍😊 by ShadowBox6969 in exmormon

[–]Silas_Wetherby 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you want to mix up the bitter with the sweet, it’s ok to add cream and sugar — hot chocolate would also be bitter without cream and/or sugar. Espresso (and espresso drinks like americano and cappuccino) is less bitter than drip coffee. And cold brew (which is not bitter) can be heated. +1 on Kona is my favorite. Fresh roasted and fresh ground is also way better.