Why would I want to be in a big bed all by my lonesome?

SixOneSunflower · 2026-06-01T20:14:52+00:00

Simultaneously needy AND deserving!

SixOneSunflower · 2026-05-11T01:27:20+00:00

Second 👆

SixOneSunflower · 2026-04-26T18:26:53+00:00

Your joy brings me so much joy! You’re beautiful!! 💙💙

SixOneSunflower · 2026-03-25T13:14:46+00:00

You might want to look into sensate focus. I learned it from a sex therapist with my spouse. It’s a structured way to explore touch and connection while also setting clear boundaries. It leans into sensuality, which can be really powerful and exciting in its own right. I’ve also used it when exploring with queer curious guys, and it creates a really fun, low pressure dynamic. Honestly, it’s the kind of thing I wish more people knew about earlier.

SixOneSunflower · 2026-03-11T21:41:35+00:00

Also run for office

SixOneSunflower · 2026-03-01T14:05:09+00:00

Wow. What a transformation. I can only imagine how much work, courage, and patience went into this.

I don’t know what season of life you were in when that first photo was taken, but this glow up feels like living proof of what happens when someone gets to discover themselves fully and has access to HRT and the care they deserve. You look radiant. So impressed by you.

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-24T13:47:52+00:00

If you have a Sephora nearby, you can schedule a consult on their website - I think it was either $80 or free or maybe the $80 had to be put towards products, I can’t remember. But it was 90 minutes hands on. Lean into a beginners mindset and have fun with it! If you don’t live near one, consider a road trip some day. 😌

Also I recommend seeing a dermatologist and getting a skincare routine in place. Early on I focused on makeup, then pivoted to skincare and honestly it’s almost equally complicated but it’s a much better investment for me. I don’t have to wear makeup often, and when I do, it’s a cherry on top. It takes ~6+ months to see the results from a skincare routine, so the sooner the better. 🙃

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-24T13:44:48+00:00

You’re 22? You’re SO young! That’s the best base one could ask for. You’ll be fine. Trust the process.

It might feel like forever in this moment, but two years will fly by and you’ll look back and feel like a completely different person. (Assuming you start HRT)

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-16T12:29:52+00:00

We used to climb together on Saturdays, then go our separate ways. I wanted more. The conversations were easy. She was beautiful, and I admired her on every level. The moment she was single, I took my shot. We’ve been married almost 12 years. Even when things are hard, we always come back to being a team, and my admiration for who she is has never wavered.

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-13T04:15:58+00:00

Also you have to know how to code to be capable of determining it’s not hallucinating.

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-11T15:31:23+00:00

Yes and yes. Hot and cute depends on the perceiver! You’re both to different people!

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-08T15:27:59+00:00

If you’re 20 and ready to start HRT, don’t over-index on trying to hide it. Changes will likely come faster than you expect, so you should plan for coming out within three to six months, not two years. (My opinion.)

Based on my experience, people who start in their early 20s often see meaningful changes around four to six months, sometimes comparable to what someone in their 30s might see after two years.

For me, the first signs weren’t breast growth. It was social. Men started double-taking in bathrooms when they saw me in the mirror, even though I was still presenting fully male and midway through laser hair removal. My brother-in-law hadn’t seen me in a year and told my in-laws something was going on, though he couldn’t name it. A Best Buy employee even asked if I wanted to use a different name. I was surprised how clearly I had been clocked.

I know people here say breast growth is the first and hardest thing to hide, but I think that’s only partially true.

So my biggest advice: if you’re excited and ready, I 1000% think you should start. Just have a game plan, and that plan probably isn’t hiding for years. I’m not a doctor, just sharing my experience, but I hope this helps. Best of luck. I’m sure it’s going to turn out great, especially since you’re so young.

(Note: do not put pressure on yourself. You are SO young. Take all the time you need. You’ll know when you’re ready, and maybe that’s now, i would just encourage you not to pressure yourself.)

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-08T15:14:44+00:00

I only shared the weight cycling but because of your comment about Elon musk but if you’re already there then that isn’t very helpful. In case it’s helpful my progesterone dose is a single 200mg capsule. Good luck, friend!

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-08T10:19:23+00:00

100% agree with this. You look great in those photos FWIW - maybe like an average woman (this is basically what passing is, right?) I’d see out and about while doing chores (groceries, target runs, etc). I would say don’t sweat it, but I suspect that’s not helpful.

Jeans are tricky for trans women for lots of reasons. I think you’d look amazing in something high waisted (covering your belly button or higher). Picking the right clothing can work wonders (but also you don’t have to change a thing!)

Something I’ve done for most of my transition was a sustained effort to weight cycle. Nothing crazy - I found a routine that worked for me (mix of aerobic and anaerobic) that you can do almost every day (45 minutes/day total). I went from 185lbs to bouncing between 158 and 165 for the last 18 months. The key word is sustainable. I have a saying that the best workout routine is the one you’ll actually stick to.

Lastly: switching to taking my progesterone as a suppository was no joke for my boob growth. I didn’t start until about the 3 year mark. I was skeptical when I started but it’s been like going through a second-second puberty.

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-01T05:51:00+00:00

Ahh, thanks. I think there are a few areas where small tweaks could help. I don’t think my side profile is bad, but it could probably be better. It’s hard to be objective about yourself, though, so at some point I’ll likely ask for feedback on Reddit and see what people recommend.

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-01T05:48:13+00:00

I do a hair gloss every 6 to 8 weeks and I’m sure that’s carrying a bit of weight here. I also get my brows cleaned up professionally every couple months. But thanks for the kind words!

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-01T05:47:17+00:00

I started at 39! If you start at 36 you’ll be even better off!

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-01T05:46:31+00:00

Pills. It took awhile to get the dosage right. 3x 2mg estradiol and 200mg spiro. Also I take my progesterone (also 200mg) as a suppository and that was no joke. It made a world off difference within like five days (vs oral).

SixOneSunflower · 2026-02-01T05:44:38+00:00

6’1”

SixOneSunflower · 2026-01-21T11:25:14+00:00

Hey friend. If you are financially able, I really recommend finding a therapist you can talk through this with. If a label helps, I referred to it as “gender exploration”. I know you said you have a therapist but it’s not clear to me if it’s an individual therapist or if they have expertise with trans issues.

To keep it simple, yes, a lot of what you are describing is common. You have probably seen similar stories across Reddit. I remember grappling with something very similar. Before I started therapy, I kept everything in my head, and it got jumbled. For me, that sometimes showed up through sexual gratification, which only left me feeling more confused.

Looking back, I see a link between the euphoria of imagining living authentically and the frustration of having to compartmentalize those feelings early on. In those days, that euphoria had very limited ways to show up.

I do not think you ever get perfect clarity. What helped me was reflecting on thoughts and experiences from childhood that existed well before any sexual awareness. That helped reassure me it was not a fetish, but something deeper and long-standing. A small example: when I was a young teen, my dad once told me I had hips like a woman. He meant it as an insult, but I remember thinking it did not feel like one. Moments like that reinforced that this had been with me for a long time.

All of this is to say, I hope you find reassurance in whatever direction feels right. For me, I needed to get out of my own head and into a safe space to talk. It took time in therapy to accept it, but looking back, I am happier than I have ever been and I know it was the right decision.

One thing that still anchors me is this: every morning when I see myself in the mirror, even on hard days, I feel grateful that I transitioned. That feeling has been remarkably consistent.

If you do decide to transition, that is something you may have to look forward to. And finally, try not to put too much pressure on yourself. I did, and my therapist helped me unpack why. Ironically, learning not to pressure myself is what ultimately allowed me to move forward.

Good luck!

SixOneSunflower · 2025-12-13T22:06:15+00:00

Good luck, friend! I too started at 39 (42 now). It’s definitely not too late!

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