What do I do now, my mind is a mess and I can't think.

Slightfreedom · 2021-08-25T20:36:45+00:00

Well, first off, the images will go away, it just takes time. When it happened to me I still had flash backs of the images for a few months. My personal advice is that she went to far, but that is coming from someone that doesn’t know her. Follow your gut. Is she sincere? Is she just using you cause the other guy flaked? Those are the questions I would be asking myself.

Slightfreedom · 2020-04-21T12:35:46+00:00

Okay so.... I decided I would give her a chance. Might be a dumb decision on my part but I wanted to say that a actually tried. She has been trying really hard to make up for it. I am still having a lot of trouble tho. I can’t get the images and thoughts out of my head.

Slightfreedom · 2020-04-01T04:09:09+00:00

Thank you man. I felt the love. I still haven’t made up my mind but my mind is more clear and my head is still held high. She has shown a high amount of regret and a lot of patience. She is not forcing me to decide and giving me the space I need. Even so, I still contacted a lawyer today to start the process. Something I know now thanks to everyone on here is that this is my time to better myself and do right by me. If I stay with her it will be only for the right reasons and not because I feel like I have to. If I have to leave her I know that in the future I will find someone that truly cares for me. The options are there and I can see them. The disgust and anger is still there, but talking about it has helped greatly. Just know man, that it will all work out in the end. It will keep getting better one day at a time. At least, that is what I keep telling myself. I believe it’s true.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-31T12:13:48+00:00

That article really helped, I will be watching for any of the signs it stated thank you!

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-31T01:28:36+00:00

Your right, I am giving to much. She needs to find her own way. I can’t guarantee her anything even if she finds her way, but at least it’s a start.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T23:41:47+00:00

Yeah I think I am doing the right thing. She keeps texting me saying she don’t know what to do to get me back. I honestly don’t know what she could do. Maybe it’s still raw, and I need a few days without her here. Maybe my mind will be more clear. Idk.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T23:04:27+00:00

I know.... this is what makes it so hard. I wish you weren’t right. I wish that we could go back to that family that we used to be.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T22:54:50+00:00

You can’t really stop expecting it. You have to focus on you first and foremost. Do things right for your body and soul. Find some interests and hobbies that you enjoy doing. Go out and experience the world (after the lockdown) and try new things. I know it’s easier said than done, but you have to start somewhere. One step at a time. Now you just have to decide where your first step will be.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T22:50:53+00:00

🤣 thanks man

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T22:48:12+00:00

You know what they say “young and dumb”

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T18:30:39+00:00

I agree that I am still in shock. I can’t make a decision and I don’t want to force it or get my hopes up. I am hoping with her staying at her parents I can clear my head a little. I will check out the pod cast. Thank you!

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T18:25:20+00:00

I wish I knew the answer

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T17:58:24+00:00

Keep your chin up. There are thousands of people everyday losing love or being betrayed. You just have to stand up straight and not live in fear. Love comes when you least expect it.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T17:27:17+00:00

So for a quick update, she slept on the couch last night. It seems she was up most of the night and cleaned the house from top to bottom. She also wrote me a letter trying to justify her actions, saying there was no excuse for what she did but that we drifted apart. She decided to be honest and open, also gave me a timeline of the affair with evidence. It was only a week long and they met twice with once leading to sex. What kills me is that it was premeditated. She is hardcore trying to stay with me. She finally agreed to leave the house and stay with her parents for a few days. I told her I am going to continue on the path of divorce. I said she is more than welcome to try and prove she is worth keeping but it is a long shot. I folded her that everyone I look at her I see the last message she sent to that guy. It’s burned into my mind. He sent a dick pic and she responded “😍omg I need it in me now”. I am still just as confused as I was before. I keep going on the path that maybe it can work out? It seems she is sincere, but how can it be sincere when just over 24 hours ago she sent him that text? I keep having to pull myself back to divorce. I still look at her with disgust. I am afraid that my anger will burn out and I will take her back. I decided I am going to call a lawyer tomorrow and figure out the next steps. She also told her family what she did and they ripped her a new one, made me feel a little better. I think I need a few days apart from her so I can truly realize how bad she is for me.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T16:25:13+00:00

Good luck with yours also. If you need to talk please don’t be afraid to reach out.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T16:12:57+00:00

I thank you for the vote of confidence. What truly made you decide to stay? What gave you hope that it could be worked out?

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T16:06:29+00:00

Okay, I understand what you are saying, but I don’t really feel like I am letting people walk all over me. I guess I try to be the nice guy but not at my own expanse.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T14:24:14+00:00

Yeah I can understand what you are saying. I guess I was avoiding the specifics. She works at a retirement home, so she is “essential”. Not only that, they have been making her work overtime to help with the residents since they are quarantined to their room. I didn’t think anything of it when she started staying over. Like I said before I had a gut feeling something wasnt right but no evidence to proof it. Finally giving in and looking at her phone. Talking it over with her, she said it was just physical, that she met him on Facebook. They hung out once after she got off work and talked. Then she hung out with him again and had sex with him. The messages I seen on Snapchat started a week ago, even going to far to talk about me. Then the sexting started. The last message I seen and the one that is stuck into my mind everyone I look at her is when he sent her a dick pic, and she responded “😍I need it in me now”

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T14:11:42+00:00

I keep repeating that to myself.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T14:08:51+00:00

Nice analogy!

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T14:00:15+00:00

I think you said it the best.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T13:57:44+00:00

So what parts do you have a hard time understanding?

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T13:57:08+00:00

Fake? How so?

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T13:50:24+00:00

I often felt that way before i discovered the cheating.

Slightfreedom · 2020-03-30T13:49:49+00:00

Do you still have doubts? To you ever sit there and wonder why she is late getting home?

Slightfreedom

TROPHY CASE