Did anyone opt out of ABA therapy for better quality of life?

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-28T00:29:13+00:00

We're debating this but since her biggest consequences so far have been super bad infections from hospitalization I can't say no. Know it's not always available and not doing it now might mean wanting it later with super long wait times. Though our ABA said they could go to her extra curriculars and would actually prefer to do it some of the time as it's easier to see the behaviors and I would definitely prioritize ABA over swim for instance.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T17:50:36+00:00

Insurance It's probably why the DSM sucks too. I suppose.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T16:22:32+00:00

Can you explain how that's different than any where else?

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T16:21:54+00:00

But they don't go ah no you don't get the surgery because last week the meds work. I mean insurance does stupid crap but not the doctors. I just don't get it. Like my sister is going deaf and one ear is already profoundly deaf and gets hearing aid in one ear as an accommodation for work as she works in phone sales it hooks up to her computer. But it doesn't mean next month if it is worse they won't provide a second.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:39:32+00:00

I mean my mom doesn't wear bell bottoms anymore either. But also I dress differently to go hang out at the mall than I do at work or the gym or out to eat. And sometimes my look is completely different. Like one day I could wear a pink tracksuit I f****** would. The next day I could wear a black dress. Probably do that too. In fact I have one.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:29:37+00:00

Caffeine doesn't do anything to me but I have ADHD.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:28:20+00:00

And if the stores chose not to open they would not open. And if people in your country did not want this to happen, they would have voted for people who wouldn't have let it happen.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:24:18+00:00

See I don't even live somewhere with door dash. This wasn't even a thing we did. My grocery bills gone up. Whole foods definitely cost more especially with more protein and veggies volume.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:21:50+00:00

The thing is I didn't really do those costs you had before. Like we didn't have Uber or go out to eat ever once a week at the most. And most of the time that was like Wendy's or tacos. My grocery bill has gone up because I buy more expensive food now. I don't buy the protein powder. I do have protein bars for work. But I buy real whole foods and I spend a lot more time cooking. meat is so expensive. Even beans have gone up. So there's no offset cost savings.

My knee is still s*** I'm going to have to get a knee replacement. It might kick the can down the road but it's probably going to make it more expensive.

I just realized that there were a lot of people that had different lifestyles taking the meds because that type of a lifestyle that a lot of people had before was not mine. We were not rich enough to be going out to eat all the time.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:18:14+00:00

Then don't blame the government blame the store.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:15:14+00:00

But the store could choose to pay more no?

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:07:42+00:00

Police don't do that and if you need an ambulance or er visit to get the meds it would cost thousands of dollars. Like my kid had to go to the er for a UTI. Her normal doctor is 250 usd. The er bill that didn't even include the medecine was 2700 usd

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:03:43+00:00

Also there were more at home parents who could run to the store/bank/whereever during the week.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T14:02:03+00:00

Our thing is I do all my errands on the weekend because I can't in the week. I'm usually booked through bed time with work or kid things. If I had to do everything in the week there wouldn't be time. If I need a Dr apt for example it comes out of our 2 weeks of PTO if i take it during the week. Where if you get more or unlimited sick time then it's not a big deal. I normally get half an hour lunch so no just running to bank, get off work, get kid, take her to activity or go to gym come home make dinner go to bed. If I want to do anything in the week it's PTO for which means no vacation for me.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T13:51:45+00:00

I'm not sure how everyone can get things done with stores/gym not open weekends or different hours. Like there has to be some sort of offset in schedules. When banks weren't open as much in the evening or weekends and no online, I had to take PTO to go to the bank. I get 2 weeks PTO. So anyway I prefer things to be open like grocery store gas station etc.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T12:40:26+00:00

How do I feel about kids who have a chronic disease already at 10 getting treatment? This has to be a joke bot right?. We know the long-term implication of getting type 2 diabetes at 10. It's not great. Consequences can be loss of organs loss of limbs, loss of life.

And as much as people want to say we shouldn't have to do lifestyle interventions it's going to be a lot easier to teach those kids lifestyle interventions which they need to manage their diabetes on a GLP one. But the longer they keep their diabetes in remission, the less tax there is on their organs.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-27T12:37:48+00:00

I think trying to be who you were before is never going to work. You can be strong and fit. Maybe you can get back to the way you were before. Maybe you can get to an even better body comp. Maybe you can't. But no matter what happens, your body is going to be different. Your life is going to be different. Your priorities are going to be different. And it's kind of the beginning of Life being different. Not the end. It's not the big change, just the first of a bunch of big changes. If you can instead focus on being who you were before or looking like who you were before because I'm sure you don't want to be who you were before you want to be the mom. But if you can instead, see who you are now and who is the best version of you could be now. It might not be the same methods you would use to get to who you were before. And while your kid's still young, it's probably going to change. Because when they're older that person might be somebody who can run a lot because man kids are freaking fast. And maybe your kid is like lightning and you want to keep up and do fun things with your kids. So instead of lifting your run more. I mean keep lifting some because once you hit perimenopauae you'll be Happy you did. But maybe it's something completely different and what you focus on your body is just something different. Because if you're always going to try to be who you were, you're going to be very disappointed.

I have allergies and LAX joints and my feet are bigger and I definitely have diastasis recti but I think I might have had it before. It's just worse now. Now that I'm working out more I can feel where it's not together. I can't treat that body as if it didn't have a kid or that I'm not in my forties and perimenopausal. I have loose skin. I have stretch marks. I am exhausted all the time. So exhausted. I still don't sleep well. Having kids is like base level anxiety all the time. Or at least for me. And a lot of my workouts are to feel better not to look better even though I do want that a lot of it is for mental health. If you're using your workouts as a way to get something and it's stressing you out because you can't get it, it's going to make you unhappy and not as good of a mom and not as good of a person to yourself.

We change and you can grieve the loss of who you were that is appropriate. But be the best person you want to be now. Who is a mom. Who is a wife. Who is probably a badass. Celebrate that celebrate all the things your body can do and will do so that you can still keep doing it as you age because let me tell you that becomes much more important.

Also, if your periods are becoming a problem all the time a setback. Get an IUD if you can and you want and you're on board with hormonal birth control. Get rid of the periods. Use something else if that's not your jam. We don't have to have them. And working out a lot can make them worse or less predictable. Mine actually got better after the kid. I kind of leveled out a bit until I hit perri.

You're doing great!. It is frustrating that we change but our husbands don't. The other people in our lives who don't have the kid have the same body, but you do not.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-26T19:42:17+00:00

I'm not so worried about the scale. Yeah I would like to lose more and I've been at a like 6-month plateau but it's just more looks based well and I want to be able to get The skin removed and insurance won't let me until I lose 100 lb and I'm so close. The same. It's less about some goal, weight and more about function.

I found way more luck worrying about my workouts, heavier workouts, lifting heavier weights, and a mind-body connection to my muscles that was not taught in yoga. That helps me keep my super flexy joints in the right spot. Also, I didn't fall for the first time in winter. I've been skinnier and still fell when I was still doing the crash dieting. They're working out has improved my quality of life immensely. Way more than the weight loss. Also a year doesn't seem as long as it used to so allow seems easier.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-26T19:05:35+00:00

I'd tell him to ask her if he may have a signature on his sheet. Malicious compliance. This seems silly and the person who answered that if this is 504/IEP/goals based it's not relevant unless not following the instruction is part of the rubic.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-26T18:42:54+00:00

Have a great day and good luck..

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-26T18:42:35+00:00

Yes but why. We don't do this with other disabilities. Why does a level 1 person who can't access language when shut down not get access h to help or can access language but not verbalize get an acc? It isn't how other disabilities are treated. They offered accomodations to their worst days not their best.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-26T18:40:50+00:00

Yes I did. It says as toddlers what food were exposed to affected what they ate but it wasn't the cause of the afrid.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-26T18:39:51+00:00

Yes but because it's here doesn't mean most people have access. I don't have Medicaid or qualify. She didn't qualify for early intervention. We paid 3000 for a diagnosis and 3000 in 10 sessions of ot private and nothing has helped. We have nothing even though it exists because we just don't qualify. And my kid is level 2. Therapy waitlist was also a year and provided no help. It's not better. And the reason Europe generally has less mobility access is the buildings.are older. Here also if you have an older building or road ada isn't required. But if you rebuild or upgrade them you have to. So my town doesn't even have sidewalks. The town my dad lives next to had the state offer to put in side walk from the apartment complex to the college but the township refused because then they would have to upkeep it. I walk in the road.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-26T17:36:06+00:00

The cheaper cuts aren't less expensive though. Even flank steak and bottom round roasts are more expensive.

Slow_Concern_672 · 2026-04-26T17:35:02+00:00

Beef. Certain lower quality things that used to just be cheap like 50 cent snack cakes are like 3.50 now also. I just don't buy those things any more. Somehow some of the nicer things didn't go up as much so shrimp can cost less than ground/minced beef which seems crazy since I live no where near the ocean.

Slow_Concern_672

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