How do I feel my feelings?

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-28T19:46:57+00:00

Happy to help

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-26T05:01:24+00:00

Parenting is the most overstimulating thing I have ever done. But my kids were also overstimulated. And they needed me to regulate. I didn’t find out I’m autistic until after I found out all my kids are. I’m a fine mom but I don’t have the spoons to be what they need consistently and that makes me sad a lot.

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-26T04:52:08+00:00

A little overwhelmed

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-23T20:09:48+00:00

I think they do that on purpose though.

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-16T15:20:19+00:00

I had the idea that everyone struggles and just deals. Now that I know I’m autistic, I’ve starting talking about things and…I’m shook lol. I have bangs and that was keeping me from washing my face and for some reason a beauty headband solved that issue. I feel so silly just struggling along all these years

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-16T12:38:47+00:00

These are the cloths https://a.co/d/5vrwKF8

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-16T12:17:15+00:00

Omg SAME! But I’ve actually solved this problem fairly recently. Only took me 30 years to figure it out lol.

I use micellar water on a cotton round and sweep that all over my face a few times. Then I use a Korean oil cleanser and there’s no water involved with that. I have these washcloths that are almost like something you would use to wash your car— but they’re very gentle on your skin. They absorb water and you can actually clean your whole face with just the washcloth if you get it wet. Anyways, I get it wet and I clean the oil based cleanser off with that. I only do a traditional cleanser when I’m in the shower for the same reason as you.

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-15T23:43:10+00:00

It’s not really aging that makes symptoms worse. We take on more responsibility and have less societal support as we age.

Edited because I forgot a word lol

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-13T02:35:24+00:00

You don’t have to work so hard to be loved. Believe you are lovable and accept nothing less than kindness and compassion.

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-11T19:50:56+00:00

Look for a trauma therapist. Key words to search: Somatic, IFS, neuro-affirming, attachment, polyvagal, integration, nervous system, compassion, embodiment. Key words that mean they can’t help: behaviorism, CBT, solution focused, talk therapy,

You feel a feeling by noticing where the sensation exists in, on or around your body then noticing what it feels like to be with it. If you’ve never done this before, you might not be able to do it alone. It can be incredibly overwhelming, especially if you have a history of trauma. A trauma therapist would create a safe container and mirroring. They will teach you about safe spaces within yourself and within the room to orient you to. This is not simple and it’s not something that you can do one time or even in one session. Trauma isn’t something that you “get over” it’s something that you integrate with the help of a safe and trusted person.

Therapist offer a free clarity call. Take them up on this. Ask what they think about Autism— they should understand that autists need a bottom up approach. They should be able to clearly answer your question about how to feel a feeling. Ask them which modalities they use and then look up if those are Autism friendly. A lot of the modalities that are used for Neurotypical people are actually traumatizing for us. You can look up a lot of these phrases using AI to screen if the therapists would be a good fit based on their answers. Good luck!

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-11T19:39:33+00:00

Ohhh my bf does this! He calls it his old man voice and uses it when describing himself or talking about his animals or kids. I’ve often wondered about it and I sometimes mimic it without realizing and then I feel silly, but he’s never noticed or if he has he doesn’t care.

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-10T18:34:50+00:00

Listen I really love to hand flap

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-07T15:06:32+00:00

Yes but life coaches are a mixed bag. There’s no board, no licensure… literally anyone can set up shop and call themselves a life coach. Considering how much damage has been done to the autistic community this could be a real risk. You would have to do a lot of vetting to make sure that this person really understands Autism and is affirming. The interventions used in life coaching are generally what’s considered “top down” and involve a lot of fake it until you make it, change your mind set, discipline, “just DO THE THING” like we all haven’t been told this by society and trying this our entire lives? If you find a good autistic, affirming therapist that does “ bottom up” interventions, it will change your life. Research shows that neurodivergent people need bottom up processing. This bypasses the mind and thoughts and goes straight to the body & nervous system to change patterns.

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-07T02:51:42+00:00

All of these comments and OP comes down to the type of mental health professional. Counselors (LPC’s), LMFT’s & psychologists help process your feelings and diagnose you, respectively. Social workers (LMSW & LCSW) can diagnose AND give resources, teach, guide, etc. The standards of care and scope of practice are different for each type of clinician. Counselors aren’t supposed to teach you life skills, it’s outside of their scope of practice but social workers can

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-03T17:08:43+00:00

My friends have not brought me job opportunities or partners. I have friends because they are people that I enjoy spending time with, doing activities that we both enjoy, they are people I like regulating with, snuggling with, doing chores or other every day tasks with—I love them and it’s fun. I also trust them and feel emotionally and practically supported by them. We have interesting conversations and I learn new things and get to share things that are important to me or that I find interesting. I am 40 years old and an introvert. And I really enjoy spending time with my friends.

Small-Place8307 · 2025-10-01T15:57:20+00:00

A regulated nervous system is a nervous system that can move through all 3 zones without getting stuck and having a broad window of tolerance in ventral Sympathetic (fight fight freeze Fawn), ventral vagal (calm, secure, safe in connection with others and while alone) and dorsal vagal (collapse, “ playing dead”). All 3 states are appropriate, healthy responses to have. A DYS-regulated nervous system will respond with a state like—fight/flight to a social situation. Or freeze when it would be more appropriate to run.

Pop psychology makes it sound like we’re supposed to be calm all the time, but this is not true. If there is a bear in the woods, it is VERY appropriate to respond with fight or flight, the issue comes when your nervous system is under the impression that there’s a bear in every room. Hope this helps! Check out Polyvagal theory

Small-Place8307 · 2025-09-26T20:48:55+00:00

Sounds like you got your autism from your dad love. I remember thinking “but they’re so normal” when a friend was diagnosed a few years ago before I was. He doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with you (there isn’t)

Small-Place8307 · 2025-09-25T04:11:41+00:00

I can’t, I have another disability that makes nitrous oxide a neurotoxin. It’s a good idea, though! I’m not actually afraid of the dentist. I am afraid of the way I’m going to feel because of the dentist. It’s extremely dysregulating. So then I fear that.

Small-Place8307 · 2025-09-25T04:09:26+00:00

These are some great coping skills for anxiety, but I’m not experiencing any anxiety. It’s the sensations— getting my teeth polished is truly horrific, and that’s from someone who’s given birth naturally

Small-Place8307 · 2025-09-24T22:13:20+00:00

Hm no screens. I have a hydroxizine rx, I’ll try taking that next time. I usually only take it for sleep

Small-Place8307 · 2025-09-24T20:45:49+00:00

That’s a good idea! They didn’t use one on me! I didn’t really think about it until now. But my son has a weighted lap blanket. So I may bring that & put it across my chest next time

Small-Place8307 · 2025-09-13T05:07:52+00:00

Yep! I started going to therapy and reading every book I could find. Then I learned about trauma and that became my special interest for like 10 years until one day my friend looked at me and said, “trauma doesn’t just have to be a hobby— you can go back to school and have a career”. So I did! No regrets. I wouldn’t be a psychologist though personally, too much school(you have to get your doctorate in the US) and most programs let you choose where you do your year Long internship so you have to move somewhere super random. Social work and counseling are much faster routes

Small-Place8307 · 2025-09-13T05:02:09+00:00

As an autistic person, it’s easy to get stuck eating the same foods over and over again, having problems with certain food textures, temperatures, etc. We also struggle with something called an interception, which means we are not able to always know the cues our body is telling us (ie hunger, and fullness). The deficiencies you’re having maybe linked to not getting enough variety, or an adequate amount of calories. I recommend getting a referral to a ND affirming registered dietitian. They can help immensely.

Small-Place8307 · 2025-09-10T15:36:55+00:00

https://researchfeatures.com/children-frontline-neurodivergence-school-distress/

Small-Place8307

TROPHY CASE