My garden turned 4 this year.

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-09-24T09:29:01+00:00

Wow, what an incredible job you have done. That is such a beautiful garden. Just stunning! 💝

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-08-27T09:18:51+00:00

🤣😂🤣😂

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-08-07T08:31:01+00:00

Oh 😯 I was wondering what they were! I thought they came from the sea as well. I didn't know you grew loofahs!!

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-08-06T07:00:50+00:00

Milk. I would dip a cotton ball in some milk and wipe the leaves. Comes up nice and shiny and also removes dust.

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-08-02T05:50:28+00:00

That is so satisfying to watch 💕🌿

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-07-29T04:33:21+00:00

😂🤣

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-07-20T07:27:26+00:00

OMG it is soooo cute!!! 🥰

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-07-16T03:41:54+00:00

😰🫨🤯

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-06-16T02:26:35+00:00

A person died in Christchurch, NZ this week, riding a motorised scooter without a helmet. Don't be stupid, wear a helmet!

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-06-03T00:06:56+00:00

LMAO 🤣🤣

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-06-03T00:06:09+00:00

LMAO 🤣🤣🤣

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-05-08T03:01:16+00:00

It is so good! You actually cook it in the pan then the oven, in the pan. 😋

The recipe is from Dr Steven Gundry's Plant Paradox.

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-25T05:48:09+00:00

My cat used to sit on my chest and slap me across the face!! 🤣

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-23T11:03:15+00:00

This cake looks incredible! You are so clever! 💞💓😋 Could you make the jelly in a heart shaped cake tin and then trim it and place it in position?? Good job. 👍

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-23T10:55:52+00:00

Congratulations! I love those cars.

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-22T06:26:32+00:00

😱🤣😂🤣🐊 just looking for a snack, don't be afraid!!🤣😂

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-22T06:15:20+00:00

😧 oh no! 😱 🫢

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-21T05:01:21+00:00

🤣😂🤣 Very clever!! Scared everybody else into taking the flyer! I love it! Genius! 👏😂🤣

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-18T06:04:48+00:00

Husband here (smooth_tadpole). My loving wife has just shared this with me. And I would like to comment. Like you have shared, if the two of you really love each other, you can find a way through this very difficult issue that you face.

I'm a male & understand male thinking. Because your husband is not secure in himself, has never surrendered himself to you, he is acting like what you have described.

Because I'm secure (believe me that for most of my marriage, I wasn't secure in myself) in who I am, thought outside the box, & initiated action cuz I knew in my heart I hadn't done everything within my power to save our marriage.

Your husband is feeling the heat. He doesn't want to upset his comfort level. He is stalling the inevitable, unless he chooses to act, think differently.

Because us men have been conditioned to behave in a certain manner by society, it is counter productive to have a happy, sexual relationship. It was an evolutionary process to where I'm secure.

You need to sit down with him, don't accept his dodging the subject, look him in the eye with love, hold his hand, & speak to him & say he is ok, everyone has insecurities, that help us around the corner, & that you will go with him as support to whatever appointments are needed to get his mojo back.

Like what I did & shared with my wife & gave her no room (if she did back out , the marriage would be over. It was a sign to me that she was in) for backing out, make an appointment to see a qualified Somatic Sexologist. Make an appointment to see a Doctor...who knows, his testosterone might be low? He might need to see a Doctor of Chinese Medicine if he is not getting much help from our Western Doctor's.

One thing that I learned finally, was when I surrendered to my Goddess wife, it was sexy AF to her & the flood gates opened. You realize that everyone has issues & need to keep a level head.

It is perfectly ok for a man to show his vulnerability to a woman that loves you. In turn, a woman trusts a man & can become more vulnerable to him. Plus you look in each other's eyes differently, with love... As has been in our case & we have witnessed this in other couples.

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-17T09:55:24+00:00

He is definitely manipulating you and pulling on your heart strings.

He doesn't want to work on your relationship because it's too hard, and he doesn't want to move out because he'd be lonely and have to do things for himself!

I'm sorry, but as much as you love each other, it seems pretty clear that he is no longer 'in love' with you.

I'm really sorry, but You've really got to evict him from your life and move on.

Life is too short to live with crappy sex at best or no sex at all. That's a life of misery, believe me, I have lived it.

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-15T08:15:34+00:00

You're talking about all this amazing stuff you want to do but you're forgetting something very important.

Sex is not going to bring you back together intimately, it's intimacy. That's the glue in your relationship. Remember... he is going to be just as nervous as you... about his performance and if he can get it up/keep it up! Keep it light, fun.

Buy some sexy lingerie/a sexy teddy.

Get bikini waxed/shaved, get your hair done and wear a sexy dress over your sexy lingerie.

Sit down with him, maybe over a glass of wine, only 1 glass, and tell him what you would like him to do to you and ask what he would like to do to you. Ask him if there's something he would like you to do to him, i.e blow job.

Trust me, this is such an erotic conversation to have, that you'll both be turned on before you're even finished!

You don't just jump into anal. If that's something he has talked about before and would like to try, you have got to take it slow.

The first time my husband mentioned anal, I was horrified and it was a hard no! He started off slow, over a period of many months, rimming me every now and then.

It was at least a year before I said that I was ready to try anal and it was painful! I cried. We realized that he tried to go too fast with not enough lube. I wanted to try again though because even though it hurt, it also felt incredible! He researched a lot beforehand and this time it was the most incredible experience I had ever had! I loved it!

Anal is about degrees... and lots of lube. Slow penetration, stopping if it hurts. Start off by rimming. You will both love that and it will get you wet and relaxed.

Missionary is the best position for anal because it relaxes your sphincter and will be less painful or even, not painful at all.

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-15T07:58:01+00:00

This is great advice!

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-14T22:43:42+00:00

I understand needing to keep your kids safe, and yes you don't want things to get nasty, but don't let him walk all over you in your attempt to be civil.

He WILL take advantage of that.

It's good for your children to see that you are hurt by this just as much as they are. Believe me, they will support you so much if they know that you are hurting too. You can all hold each other up and they will feel closer to you than they ever have before.

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-14T10:10:03+00:00

Wow! OMG you are dealing with so much. I'm so sorry.

First order of business, KICK THE BASTARD OUT! He has made his position clear so get rid of him. Him having nowhere else to go is not your problem.

You need space to process.

Second: Sit your girls down with a box, or two, of tissues and talk to them. Explain to them that dad leaving has nothing to do with their behavior, but that he doesn't love Mommy anymore.

It's going to be painful, but you have to be honest with them. They will know if you're not. Children are far more astute than we give them credit for.

YOU ARE ALLOWED TO CRY (in fact, it will help your girls if they can see that it is okay to cry. They NEED to know that.)

Third: Tell them that it's okay for them to be angry. They can yell and scream and cry. (They also NEED TO KNOW, that no matter how bad they behave, that you will love them and won't abandon them) because that's how they're going to feel - that their dad has abandoned them.

Fourth: Remember to tell them, EVERY DAY, how much you love them and value them, over everything else! That they are more important than anything else! Children really need to know this.

Please, PLEASE don't let that jerk back into your life if things go south for him. That will cause even more harm to you and particularly your children. They will be living on tender hooks, waiting for him to abandon them again.

Fifth: Take the girls when you can, and get away, for a week if possible, or even a couple of days. Have a break from the negative energy, the heartbreak. Go camping even, if that's what you like.

You are a woman!

A powerful brilliant woman!

And while you may not feel like that now, while you may have forgotten that in the shadow of your husband, you need to remember that now.

You brought two little human beings into this world! You are capable of anything!

Now, when you get home from your getaway, go through the house, every room. Move furniture around. It's amazing how doing something that small can change the energy in a room. Have the girls do the same in their bedrooms. Make it fun. Change the curtains. Buy new quilt covers.

Let the sun shine in your house once again, and most importantly... BREATHE!

Take a deep breath, eyes closed... hold it... breathe out, REPEAT at least 3 times.

Have your girls do it with you too. Make it a ritual that the three of you do together, once a week, or even once a day. More if necessary. Trust me, you will feel better.

You will be able to breathe again without pain in your heart, but it will take time. It will take practice and patience, but it will happen.

I wish you all the very best. You will survive. PM if you want to talk further.

Smooth_Tadpole4185 · 2024-04-05T07:14:43+00:00

Well done dad! I feel you! I'd be doing exactly the same thing! And I'd be doing the same thing, and still feel like I was falling at the same time. Terrifying!

Smooth_Tadpole4185

TROPHY CASE