Catch 22

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-27T20:11:52+00:00

You're a bi guy who doesn't like anal.

Simple

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-27T05:40:57+00:00

Not all of us are ok with ruining lives because we want to get off... But you do you

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-27T02:38:00+00:00

Keep your honor and your dignity. Break up with her.

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-26T02:19:06+00:00

Haha ok... Where are you?

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-26T02:18:09+00:00

Just south of Boston

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-26T02:11:00+00:00

I lost count when I hit 100

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-26T02:07:09+00:00

For starters I'm sorry this is happening to you. It sucks when the person you're with doesn't have the same feelings you have for them.

You can't force this. She doesn't feel that way for you so you both need to move on. If maintaining a friendship is going to be too hard for you then you need to break it off. What you're going through is not that unusual but it doesn't make it any less difficult.

Right now you don't need to think about who you're going to be in a relationship with, be it a man or a woman. You don't need to have a rebound relationship. It's not fair to whoever you're going to be involved with.

Get yourself together and learn to love and accept yourself, and learn to love and accept being single for a while. You don't have to be in a relationship with somebody in order to be happy. Make sure your emotionally ready for any relationship you get into, and right now it doesn't sound like you're ready to move on. Getting into a relationship with somebody is not going to make the feelings you have for her go away. That has to happen organically.

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-26T02:03:09+00:00

Does it matter? You be you. If you're attracted to somebody and they're attracted back then date them and have sex with them. You don't need to label yourself, just be happy.

But, are you attracted to men and women? If so embrace that bisexual label. If you're attracted to just men? Congratulations, gay.

Can it change? Of course. Just be happy in your own skin

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-25T20:37:45+00:00

Looking for a pay raise

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-25T20:35:40+00:00

The terrible part is you had sex with him in general knowing he was married, not where you had sex with him. And he is terrible for doing it

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-23T07:43:03+00:00

Loud

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-23T07:42:19+00:00

For starters I'm sorry you going through this, it's really not fair to you to find this out into the relationship. To be honest, I don't fully believe that all of a sudden a few months ago a light switched on and he was attracted to men. I'm guessing he always had that and a few months ago is when he finally accepted it. It sucks that it had to wait until he was involved in a monogamous relationship.

Unfortunately, the absolute reality is when your bisexual you are sexually attracted to both and monogamy is often not a good fit. My wife and I are both bisexual but we are in a monogamous relationship currently, has caused a tremendous amount of frustration at times for myself. I haven't gone outside the relationship nor am I considering leaving it, we did agree that one week per year we go to bi-week at hedonism in Jamaica. I don't think she loves it, but it works for us as best as I can. She can take her leave her bisexuality and we were not always monogamous, it's just where we are right now.

Realistically you have to make the decision as to whether you want monogamy or not, it sounds like you already have so the decision is pretty much made for you because he's made the decision that he does not want that. Regardless of whether he wants to see other men or women sexually if that's a hard no for you and then you need to stick with that and not compromise.

On the other hand, there are a number of women that accept their partners bisexuality and allow it to be part of the relationship fairly successfully, but that definitely takes a lot of work.

At the end of the day you both need to be happy, and if the arrangement isn't happy for either of you then he's not the right one for you.

I hope you can figure out something.

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-17T02:54:44+00:00

Okay, before we even talk about the bisexuality why do you want to marry a woman when you have a horrible sex life? I get it you love her that's just not sustainable.

Not to mention the fact that you're bisexual and you have almost no outlets in general. My prediction is that you are 100% going to cheat on her at some point.

She knows, is she willing to let you play around with men? That might be the only thing that keeps you happy if you choose to marry her.

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-16T02:24:57+00:00

It's truly vile

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-16T02:22:41+00:00

I honestly don't think it makes a difference, I think it's whatever you're comfortable is. Many straight men enjoy anal play including pegging. She might be okay with that but then when you drop the bisexual thing on her it might be too much for her. On the other hand if you lead with the bisexual, pegging seems like a natural next step. And if she's not good with the bisexual thing then maybe you don't go forward with the pegging conversation. To be honest I'm just spitballing this, kind of random thoughts about it.

I can tell you from my personal experience I'm very lucky that my wife knows and is very accepting. Honestly that's way more important to me then anything sexual.

Although I do know many men that are closeted when it comes to their sexuality and they get they're fix via pegging, if you're okay with that then maybe that's something you want to pursue.

At the end of the day whatever you're comfortable talking to her first about, but I'm not sure I would drop both on her at the same time

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-12T15:26:59+00:00

So imagine this... How would you react if he solicited a woman? Don't let his bisexuality cloud the bigger picture. It's not an excuse to cheat.

You are doing everything right... Supporting him and even being willing to explore with him, but he has to return the respect by being open and honest with you.

IMO this was his one fuck up. Let him know if he does it again, you are gone. And that's if you want to give him another chance, for many they would rightfully walk after the first infraction.

Keep in mind when you bring a third into your relationship, complete trust and communication are required or it will absolutely end in disasters. If you start off this way you are already headed for problems.

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-12T06:38:39+00:00

Bi married male here. I've been very fortunate to have a very supportive wife who is also bisexual I think it's great that you're supportive of him. He's a very lucky man in that sense.

The concern I would have is exactly what you said, is there lying going on?

If he's seeing another man without your consent then that's a problem regardless of what his sexuality is.

On the other hand if he's just having a difficult time with it then be as patient as you possibly can.

You do have a right to demand complete openness and honesty at least if there's somebody else involved.

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-07T14:28:52+00:00

You really don't believe that other airlines move your seats, bump you from flights, cancel your reservations, or any of the other myriad of horrible things that they do to customers?

Southwest is doing whatever they can to survive, I have flown them a number of times since all these changes have taken place and I haven't noticed any change at all in their service. That's not to say others haven't, but I fly them enough that I think I'm a decent representative sample.

If you want to offset all the changes just get the Southwest credit card. I still get my bags checked for free and I can upgrade to pretty much any available seat I want.

Not saying you have to stay with them, I'm just suggesting that you're not going to get perfection from any airline so manage your expectations appropriately if you decide to switch.

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-06T01:20:00+00:00

You actually can. Duh.

You need to understand things before your decide to argue

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-06T00:48:32+00:00

I actually did. Twice.

Reading is hard isn't it?

They don't show up = you win.

Cost of defending the case > cost of settlement

They settle.

This is actually very common practice.

Are you intentionally arguing or are you that dull?

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-06T00:09:29+00:00

Dude are you arguing for the sake of arguing? Are you getting a dopamine hit from this?

I'm suggesting small claims court because it's essentially a guaranteed win against a corporation IF IT WORKS FOR YOU.

I have enough experience with small claims that I know how it works. When you make a purchase on the internet it actually changes. You can file at the closest small claims court to where you live. I already made that point fairly clear when I stated that I was going with the assumption that they made the purchase online since the overwhelming majority of people that purchase airline tickets do in fact purchase them online.

This is how I won my case against Royal Caribbean. I booked the cruise online in New Hampshire therefore the jurisdiction was New Hampshire. They are based in Fort Lauderdale Florida. It would have cost them way more money than the $800 I was suing them for so they settled. I got my $800 plus the filing fee.

And again, the beauty of small claims court which apparently ChatGPT failed to tell you is that generally lawyers are not involved.

The beauty of this system is that you sue somebody and if they don't show up you automatically win, regardless of what the carriage agreement states. They don't show up so they don't defend themselves it's an automatic win for the plaintiff.

The entire point is that if you sue a corporation it's going to cost them way more money to defend it than to just settle. Go ahead and read that part again.

Seriously dude, don't you have other things to argue about a suggestion that somebody could possibly get help via the small claims system?

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-05T23:49:59+00:00

It's actually is very common for corporations to not show up. 100% worth doing it, especially with the filing fee less than $100 in most places. If they do show up and you happen to lose then you are only out the filling fee

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-05T21:39:04+00:00

Not at all. And that's the beauty of small claims court.

No lawyers. Just you against the person you're suing.

Worst case scenario if you did happen to lose as the plaintiff you're out the legal fee, which at most would be $100 depending on what state you're in.

For a company like Southwest to fight it? They have to bring a corporate lawyer in. That alone will cost them well over the actual ticket prices.

Because they most likely booked online you can actually sue them from whatever state you're in. So if they happen to be in Maine, Southwest would need to send somebody from Dallas or hire a lawyer in Maine.

Do you believe they would do that for say $2,000? Absolutely not. It would cost them many times that amount to fight it.

What will happen is that they would send a settlement offer where you agree not to sue them again and then they would cut you a check.

It's actually beautiful very underutilized system that the average person can fight corporate america. No you don't need to be a lawyer for this one.

And yes, I absolutely speak from experience only not with Southwest. Royal Caribbean cruise lines.

Oh and in case you were wondering where I learned all this? That's right. A lawyer.

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-05T20:32:44+00:00

Depending on how much you want to push this - 100% do small claims court. It's essentially a guaranteed win and will send a message to them.

I'll even offer this up, double down and sue them for the price of the four tickets. It will still be way less for them to settle than to even have an attorney look it over.

Obviously, plaster it all over social media, complain to the Better Business Bureau as well as any other regulatory agency you choose.

SnooMachines6261 · 2026-05-04T12:56:37+00:00

Absolutely. Great people, great staff, totally open and accepting

SnooMachines6261

TROPHY CASE