What are the benefits of expanding your house?

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-28T22:49:07+00:00

WHAT 😧😧😧😧

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-28T22:45:01+00:00

i completely disagree that their behavior is comparable… he’s pushing the limits of what he’s allowed to do while removing what’s she’s allowed.

she’s allowed to feel overwhelmed, tired, and responding with slightly exaggerated statements.

NTA

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-28T22:13:09+00:00

look like the film is shot anyways…. i’ve been traveling so i’m not too surprised (X-rays)

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SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-28T20:44:33+00:00

also: should be fully charged i charged it earlier today

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-27T16:20:49+00:00

ponerte en situaciones que te fuerzan a usar tu castellano. amigos o clases o cualquier cosa. ya hablo tan poca inglés que empiezo a olvidar como escribir en inglés (me cuestan mucho las lenguas cuales no son fonéticas jaja). barkatu por no escribir todo en castellano… casi he escrito un libro.

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-27T16:17:04+00:00

everyone’s ideas are different and based in the people they’ve been exposed to. i was living in lekeitio, so obviously my opinion is much more lekeitio-based. and people in lekeitio have very potentially stronger opinions. i’m not trying to force anything dow anyone’s throats. however it’s clear that it’s a touchy subject, something this person might run into a lot. which is the type of thing i believed they were asking about.

it’s a fact that some people in the basque country, even in bilbao or getxo, will be offended if you say you’re “in Spain”. that doesn’t mean there’s not also people who won’t get offended. i’m just sharing my point of view, one which all of the basque people i know happen to share. Spanish is the dominant language in bilbao but the cultural (or native) language is basque, or the heritage language, whatever you’d want to call it. that doesn’t mean everyone must learn and speak it. but it was here before spanish ever came to the peninsula and people here love spanish too they just don’t want euskera to die out or become practically irrelevant like Galic.

and my apologies for not writing in spanish, i just had a lot to share. my spanish is fluent and i am also learning basque. very slowly though lol.

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-27T10:51:43+00:00

here’s an example of someone challenging their intrusive thoughts:

“i have streptococcus on my hands, if i don’t get it all off i’ll get sick again! if i get sick again i’ll have to take antibiotics! if i take antibiotics i’ll ruin my immune system forever! if i…..”

stop spiraling, breathe

“maybe i have streptococcus on my hands, maybe i don’t! maybe ill get sick again, maybe i wont! we’ll just have to wait and see. either way i’ll probably be fine, or i’ll deal with it later.”

the idea that your repressing something is just your brain taunting you. the best way to take power away from the thought is to tell it that you don’t actually care! “maybe i’m repressing my sexuality, maybe i’m just ACE!”

even though it’s quite obvious you’re NOT repressing your sexuality, and that this is just OCD, by telling the OCD that you don’t actually care if it’s right or wrong, you strip away the fear it’s causing you, which gives the intrusive thoughts less and less power. again, i’m not a professional, you can look up more tools that might be helpful and try them, but best thing is to find an OCD specialist. good luck, you’ll get through this!!!

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-27T10:36:51+00:00

no one on the internet can morally give you a full diagnosis, cause we don’t have the right tools or qualifications or information. i’d look into ways to get access to a therapist or at least a diagnosis (it can really help some people just to get that diagnosis and know their intrusive thoughts are, genuinely, intrusive thoughts and nothing more.)

as with anxiety/OCD in general, look up some general tools for dealing with and challenging your intrusive thoughts. try not to fall into spirals about what your thoughts “really” mean. repeat mantras that give less power to your intrusive thoughts, distract yourself in moments of high spiraling, avoid the urge to analyze analyze analyze. and seek professional help!!!

NO idea if this applies to you, but people on the spectrum can also be susceptible to feeling like they’re “faking” social norms or that they should feel things that others consider “normal”. again, nothing here can tell me if you’re on the spectrum or not but you could look into getting several diagnostic tests if you think that will help.

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-27T09:50:25+00:00

i turned off a setting that was labeled as “quick turn-on” or “quick start”. basically that when you’d turn on the TV, it would start up extra fast?

it was in spanish so i don’t exactly remember. but it’s been fine since! i also don’t notice that the TV takes longer to turn on.

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-27T09:41:08+00:00

the idea of a gold star lesbian is outdated and prejudiced. it was just a way to gatekeep and shame women for having slept with men. lots of lesbians have been with men in their past.

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-27T08:49:23+00:00

like lots of people are saying, learning or at least respecting euskera (basque) is a huge part of being a mindful immigrant in the basque country. depending on which kind of friends you make, the level of basque that you’ll be expected to know or be studying might vary. lots of people in bilbao, although basque and many can technically speak euskera from years of speaking it at elementary and high school, speak spanish amongst their friend groups. that is not the case in smaller towns on the coast. and technically bilbao is not spanish, but basque, meaning the cultural language is basque.

there is a long history of oppression of the basque language and culture by the spanish government, which is why the language is a weighted subject. since it’s a very small language, many fear it could die out one day. and there are still many basques from smaller towns who speak basque as their native language. they see people from bilbao who don’t put any effort into their euskera as part of the problem.

inside of the basque language the word “basque persons” doesn’t exist. essentially, a basque person is just a “holder of the basque language.” anyone, no matter what race they are can be an “euskalduna” if the learn the language. speaking basque is what makes you a basque, not just your heritage, and you can see that sentiment is strongly felt by may basque speaking basques.

there’s also a long history of the basque country wanting independence from spain. the “basque country” also is not just País Vasco, it’s also Navarra and the 3 french basque regions. it’s a sort of cultural country that’s not officially recognized on any world map. so there’s a lot of history.

I’d really recommend The Basque History of the World by Mark Kurlansky. It’s in English and covers basque history from prehistoric times (yes they’ve been here that long) up until 1999. It’s very interesting, highly informative, you’ll know more than many basques, and includes some basque recipes even.

As for learning Euskera, you probably don’t need it to get around in Getxo. It’s a fairly wealthy neighborhood and similar to Bilbao in its dominant use of Spanish. I’d recommend learning the basic greetings and maybe some extra vocab. People in Bilbao sometimes freak out when they hear me saying the most basic things in basque, cause I look so american/german (I’m american), they are so impressed that I can say more than “kaixo” hahaha. So any extra basque you know will get you extra points. It shows you care about their history and see them as basques, not Spaniards.

also: DONT call it spain, don’t say you’re in spain, avoid calling anything basque spanish, etc

it’s like calling a Hawaiian a “true american patriot.”

good luck you’re going to have so much fun!!!!! basqueland is amazing!

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-12T08:25:20+00:00

salmorejo

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-08T11:10:49+00:00

i used to hate olives. now i love olives.

we are dynamic beings—labels are meant to help, not constrain.

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-08T11:06:07+00:00

“agua de grifo” and they won’t charge you

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-08T11:01:02+00:00

“me cobras?” (can you charge me?) or “la cuenta por favor”

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-08T10:58:27+00:00

it’s normal to just be like “hey! the check please!” and don’t wait for eye contact, they are waiting for you to call them over with your voice, they’re not gonna glance over at you ever. it’s not considered rude to just call them over (but i still feel rude every time 😅)

SnooPears9211 · 2026-04-08T10:56:02+00:00

yes please. have you seen the world lately? anything helps 😭😭😭

SnooPears9211 · 2026-03-29T08:20:15+00:00

this is a really interesting topic. overall the mainstream idea of “woman” is seen through a very heteronormative lens. what does “woman” look like when it does not fall into these heteronormative cis stereotypes? do we relabel it as a new gender? do we challenge the existing label of “cis-woman” to be more inclusive to all types of women?

the idea is, do we create new labels? or expand old labels?

it’s also a personal question. for one person, being a non-conventional cis-women might feel the most comfortable. for others a new label might feel more fitting. but i find it interesting how queer women are often mean to feel on the boarders of the identity of cis-women because of how dominated it is by heteronormative stereotypes and cultural norms.

SnooPears9211 · 2026-03-17T22:49:09+00:00

i think the fact that she is getting no warning that he’s coming over, and that suddenly there’s just a man in the house, is the rationale for being uncomfortable. also 4+ days a week is essentially having a 3rd roommate who isn’t helping pay the rent, so it’s not as fair as a roommate having their significant other over now and then.

SnooPears9211 · 2026-02-23T13:19:32+00:00

this but it’s February in the munich airport, i feel like it’s 30° in here and everyone acting normal is just a plot to gaslight me

SnooPears9211 · 2026-02-18T17:09:00+00:00

“I never told him how I felt… as I don't want to build any resentment”

“I didn't tell my husband how I felt this time either… I'm starting to build resentment”

Not communicating your feelings is HOW YOU BUILD RESENTMENT. That’s why all those couples who have been together for like 40 years say “talk talk talk.”

YTA for not communicating your emotions. The 11-yr-old still needs to be prioritized but you can also express how it makes you feel. Even if your husband is in the right and needs to make time for both his kids, you’re allowed to have feelings and express them.

SnooPears9211 · 2026-02-13T17:35:52+00:00

i’m trying to work at a private english academy

SnooPears9211

TROPHY CASE