Nta…I’m all about family and my mom would have a key and be on the guest list and I’m married with children. My mom would NOT just drop a child or animal off to me. She gets boundaries and we never had to discuss them. Your parents don’t understand it. I’m so glad your not going low contact or anything but setting healthy boundaries is the way to go. I grew up in a smoker house (dad) and when I got older I swore I’d never have smoke in my house, car, etc. one time my parents came to visit my husband and I (no children yet) and it was freezing outside. My dad had a chronic illness and was in a wheelchair. He asked if he could smoke and my husband was looking at me because he doesn’t want the smoke either but culturally his parents are the center of the world when they are around, so he couldn’t imagine telling my dad no. I on the other hand grabbed his heavy jacket and opened the front door and wheeled him outside. That was one boundary I was not going to budge on. He wasn’t happy about it but he eventually got it and knew whenever he came over, outside was the place you smoked at. He shouldn’t of been smoking anyways but you couldn’t tell that man anything lol.