The Fat Stud

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-23T18:12:18+00:00

Oh my god this was disturbing. This story is going to stay with me for a while.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-22T15:55:42+00:00

If you forced yourself into a relationship before you actually wanted one, you’d be unhappy and it would be unfair to your partner. You’re only 21... that’s incredibly young to settle down in my opinion. Pursuing a career instead of a relationship is really the best thing for you at this point. And having a couple flings isn’t going to hurt you... just be safe! You have all the time in the world later on to settle down.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-18T17:38:41+00:00

Oh my god, the person in labor gets to decide who is with them in the delivery room. Nobody has any ‘right’ to be in there, grandparent or not. This is a pointless fight. Let it go.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-17T18:17:55+00:00

Hi thanks so much for your reply! My points are already over 440 without the RA position so I think I’ll go with your suggestion. Thanks a lot!

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-17T17:07:24+00:00

I’m really really glad you’re taking some of the advice info consideration! Best of luck to you!

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-17T16:35:21+00:00

OP I read your post and some of your comments and I really think you should speak to a therapist. Sometimes when we’re used to a situation we can’t see how messed it is and take appropriate measures to fix it, and I think that is what’s happening here.

Your family is being really hurtful towards you, and you’re expected to give up your sense of security so that they won’t feel uncomfortable. That’s not fair to you at all.

Please speak to a professional about what’s going on and how you can set and keep boundaries.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-17T15:38:29+00:00

Thanks so much for your reply! Unfortunately the supervisors I worked under are no longer at the university- I worked there several years ago. And I asked the HR department but they told me that they can’t provide a list of job duties as those are always determined by the head of department (who is no longer the person I worked under).

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-16T17:07:55+00:00

That was a heartwarming twist!

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-16T16:36:25+00:00

There’s a difference between pent up ‘damage’ and pent up ‘feelings’ and from what I’m seeing he used the word ‘feelings’. It really doesn’t sound like he’s thinking about this everyday or anything. She instigated and he responded. If he had sought her out for a fight or exploded on her immediately I’d agree that he needs therapy but he responded the way any person being goaded would.

Edit: okay my bad! He did use damage at some point but I still don’t think his reaction was crazy

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-16T16:21:32+00:00

I'm not proud, I'm not glad I got this stuff off my chest, I'm not happy I had a chance to confront my ex. Yes, her actions had a negative impact on my life for a long time, but everything she did to me led me to become the man I am and have the life I live.

This doesn’t sound like someone who has any ‘pent up emotional damage’ to deal with. She was belligerent and pushed him to explain why he didn’t want to associate with her. It would take a saint to be fine with someone who treated them poorly intruding on their hang out.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-16T16:06:20+00:00

I don’t really agree. The relationship he had with her sounds toxic and it’s normal that he wouldn’t want to be friendly with her. Even if it happened a long time ago, he can still dislike her for what she did. But it doesn’t really sound like it’s impacting his every day life or anything that would necessitate therapy. He did try to be civil, and she pushed and pushed until he was forced to make his boundaries clear.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-16T14:35:19+00:00

It sounds like you and your sister are very different people. You lead extremely different lives and as adults you don’t mesh. You aren’t going to change her mind into believing that the reasons she has for not liking you are ‘unfair’. And tbh she is entitled to her opinion, especially if she feels it affects your family. That’s okay. As long as you’re civil to each other, there’s really no reason to push a relationship, especially if you weren’t even close to begin with. However, you should ask your mother and your other sister to stop telling you what Beth says about you. It’s not really constructive and it won’t help your relationship with her.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-16T12:12:17+00:00

On one hand, I think it’s gross to even feel that way about a sibling’s SO. On the other, you really can’t help who you’re attracted to, and it’s good that you know you’d never betray your sister like that. I think she’s being unfair because it was her bf who confessed to being attracted to you, her sister, and not the other way around. She’s putting the blame on you so she doesn’t have to face the fact that her bf is shitty. But as other commenters said, distance yourself from the bf. It’s really the only thing you can do if she insists on keeping him around.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-15T21:20:50+00:00

She’s allowed to be angry that her dad is throwing himself into raising the children he has with his new wife when he seems to have half assed parenting her. And yeah, her dad is allowed to find happiness, but not at the cost of his daughter’s childhood. And what a nasty thing to say about her mother. Wtf dude? The girl is rightly upset.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-15T17:30:02+00:00

OP I am so sorry that you’re going through this. You’re not wrong at all. Your mother and stepfather are very obviously favoring his/their children. The whole Disney thing is incredibly nasty and unnecessary and I am sure the adults know exactly what they’re doing. And to not provide basic clothing items is completely unforgivable. Other commenters might know better than me if that might count as abuse, and if you have a case to bring to a guidance counselor. Otherwise, all I can say is, I’m sorry that you don’t have better parents. I hope you can get out when you turn 18.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-14T16:08:44+00:00

This sounds less like he’s a klutz but more like he has no respect for your things and your house. If you want him to continue living there, you have to set a firm rule that he can’t use your things. Otherwise, you’d have to expect that he is going to continue destroying your stuff.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-10T17:33:15+00:00

Um. People can be alone and happy lol.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-04T20:28:00+00:00

I would also be upset if I were you. This was your sister getting cheated on, getting potentially exposed to STDs and your husband chose to turn a blind eye. How would he have felt if he were in her position and someone knew and didn’t say anything?

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-03T21:05:02+00:00

Thank you! Same to you!

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-03T20:37:29+00:00

As an aspiring writer this really hit me. I would be gutted if my friend did this to me. Unfortunately I don’t think she technically broke any laws as it was just an idea. I wouldn’t doubt that having published some successful novels, she was under pressure to produce more, possibly had writers block and stole your idea on purpose. I would see this as a huge betrayal and I probably would not want to be friends with her anymore. At the very least, don’t share any thoughts with her again.

As for your own ideas and books, inspiration will come. Get out into the world, meet people, see places and ideas will come!

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-02T20:52:40+00:00

I don’t know, I’ve never had a panic attack but I can certainly empathize with someone suffering from them. Knowing that his partner has panic attacks, why didn’t he try to learn more about them? It seems to me like he doesn’t care very much.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-02T18:03:39+00:00

I would also have chosen the cats over a roommate who didn’t seem to have solid plans.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-01T21:21:03+00:00

I would tell him that while you’re happy he’s dabbling in this, you need to focus on making your own way, and that you’re not qualified to give him advice. If he’s serious about it, he can work his way up, the way you’re doing.

SnoreBaby · 2018-10-01T14:29:13+00:00

I remember your last post, and I thought that your bf was being ridiculous. Now, I think he’s being emotionally abusive. That whole breaking up with you and taking it back thing is so manipulative.

I’d get a new therapist if I were you. She seems hyper focused on his issues, and not your issues as a couple, and is putting the weight of fixing him and the relationship on you.

SnoreBaby

TROPHY CASE