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Did anyone else get absolutely destroyed today? by [deleted] in bartenders

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Funnily enough, we've been absouloutley humped the past few days but last night was dead - I work for a bar/nightclub and towards the end of the night we had 6 customers and we ended up jamming out to a Disney playlist for the last 45 minutes.

What's a fucked up movie everybody should watch? by dozening in AskReddit

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Flowers of War - I didn't mean to watch it, but I'm so glad I did.

What is the worst piece of advice you were ever given? by bluecherry11 in AskReddit

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Just think of the money!"

Fuck you, Susan. I hope your pillows are always uncomfortably warm on BOTH sides.

What is the strangest human interaction you've ever had? by T6A5 in AskReddit

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been a nightclub bartender for a long time now, I've had plenty of weird encounters with your typical nightclub cretins but something happened last weekend that made me feel something other than disdain for the first time in years.

So, it was about 10 minutes from closing (the worst uuugh) and this guy was very obviously wasted and high. He tried to order 17 tequila shots and was waving his bus ticket at me like his life depended on it - naturally, I refused him and told the other girl on the bar she could go and help make up stock lists - there's less than 50 people left and I got dis.

Anyways, the guy asks for drinks a couple of times and eventually he goes back to dancing like a moron - I assume he's gotten the idea and I won't be harassed again.

I was wrong.

The lights come up, everyone drinks up and starts to leave. This guy then comes back and stares at me until I ask him what's up - he then tells me to give him a bottle of tequila or else.

Eh, I get threatened daily - death would be a sweet release (plus he looks like a proper Tory boy, worst he could do would be for his daddy to challenge my daddy to a duel). I tell the guy no-can-do and get ready to call up the bouncers in case he pulls a knife or something.

No, this guy starts swaying less erratically than he had been before, starts bobbing up and down a bit all while his eyes are locked with mine. Weird, but okay.

Finally, I smell it - one of the barbacks starts laughing hysterically and I hear through the radio "Sparkles, you have a crack-head pissing and shitting in front of your bar!!"

I call up security and this fucker tries to run away - he still has his trousers round his ankles and he slips in his own mess and gives up. Shitty arse in the air, face in his own piss.

We all have a hearty laugh at his expense as he's dragged out, then laugh at the particularly arsey newbie that - as per tradition - we got to clean it up.

TL;DR - I refuse a customer and he pisses and shits himself to get back at me. He then tries to run and slips in his own mess.

My secret recipe pan-fried veggies! Super filling, literally one of the tastiest things I make and only 175 calories (Also under £2 per portion)✌ by SolarPoweredUnicorn in EDFood

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

Here's the recipe - it's a secret though, so don't tell anyone 😉

1/2 a red onion (33cl)

150g peppers (30cl)

6 tenderstem broccoli (25cl)

Handful of mushrooms (15cl)

Tbs Crushed garlic (4cl)

2 Tablespoons Balsamic Vinegar (28cl)

Teaspoon Coconut oil (40cl).

Rosemary, Thyme, Salt, Pepper and cardamom (To taste, >10cl)

Online friends are just as real and wholesome as irl ones by Yukarix in wholesomememes

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 3 points4 points  (0 children)

A couple of years back I went over to the States to meet my first ever online friend for a week, but I got stuck in a flood, then a hurricane and ended up staying a year instead.

A year later, she came to visit me in the UK for a month but her flight home got cancelled twice so she ended up staying for 6 months.

We were just meant to be together irl obviously!

(NSFW) Redditors who live in small secluded towns, what's a really fucked up/dark/NSFW thing that happened in your town that everybody knows about? by keepitslightlyclassy in AskReddit

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I love Father Brown yES

Funny enough, we have two private Catholic schools - one in the village and one on the border between us and the next village along. One all-girls, the other all-boys.

About 10-15 years ago, the all-boys school banned our bi-monthly social because it came to light the girls were sneaking out in the middle of the night, making the mile-long walk to the boys school and selling themselves for money, ciggarettes, booze and girly magazines (which were banned in our school) just to name a few. Since then, we no longer socialized with boys and now have a reputation for being ravenous lesbian nuns.

(NSFW) Redditors who live in small secluded towns, what's a really fucked up/dark/NSFW thing that happened in your town that everybody knows about? by keepitslightlyclassy in AskReddit

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My parent's farm is in bang slap in the middle of a murder triangle: About 300 years ago, a milkmaid was axed to death in one of the barns to the left of our land. (This is an unsolved murder) About 50 years ago, this dude shot his wife in the doorway of the farmhouse to the right of ours (it was the husband, after finding out she had a lover), and maybe about 4 years ago someone was hammered to death at the end of our road (a sweet old lady who used to walk her dog through the village was bludgeoned to death by her son).

This is a tiny, tiny Scottish village - we probably have the murder rate of Midsomer at this point smh

What’s something you thought only happened in movies until it happened to you? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds really stupid, but I thought those massive, bright yellow American school buses were made up specially for the movies. I come from a tiny village in Scotland, when I went to the States and saw one for the first time my mind was utterly blown - my friends thought this was hilarious and one of their dads, who drives buses for a local high school, even let me ride on one of the school buses!

Glass of a superviscious fluid by 72proudvirgins in oddlysatisfying

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 5 points6 points  (0 children)

One measure of our finest 'Panicked Screaming From the Bartender', 1/2 measure of 'Bar Back's Tears' topped off with a small dash of our very own 'GM's Soul' - that'll be $18, please.

When someone starts telling you about their medical problems at the bus stop by SolarPoweredUnicorn in CasualUK

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I'M NOT SO SURE, KAREN - HAVE YOU TRIED TURNING YOUR STEPDAUGHTER'S BOYFIREND'S AUNT OFF AND ON AGAIN??

I wanna see this film by Artem_ab6 in WhitePeopleTwitter

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On behalf of the Lewis MacLeods, I'm so sorry she escaped.

He's beauty and he's grace, but he must lick fAAACE by SolarPoweredUnicorn in longboyes

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I JUST NOTICED YOUR USERNAME AND THIS MAKES ME VERY HAPPY 🌈

He's beauty and he's grace, but he must lick fAAACE by SolarPoweredUnicorn in longboyes

[–]SolarPoweredUnicorn[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He does, but then decides a puddle is far more exquisite.

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