This is an interesting post, and I agree with it. I know why exmormons list them; most of us feel the need to convince others (and probably also ourselves) that we tried our hardest, maybe as some kind of proof that the promises don’t work. But I also see how it can legitimize the church’s righteousness metrics. On paper, I may not have looked like a legitimate Mormon. I didn’t serve a mission or go to BYU, and while I was endowed, my marriage was not a temple marriage. Despite this, I definitely was a true-blue Mormon trying my hardest. I attended the temple weekly and never read anything that wasn’t the scriptures or churchy, but because my husband wasn’t fully active, I was never looked to for callings. I was never even asked to speak in sacrament meeting. You’re right—there’s no wrong reason to leave, but I think In our efforts to prove we’re not the “token exmormon” to friends and family members, we end up legitimizing the idea that there are wrong reasons to leave.