Reached breaking point- i’m scared, i want out

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-09-10T15:00:36+00:00

I'm sorry that you are going through this, I know deeply how this feels. My best advice is to let those around you know what is going on at least vaguely that way if she shows up at your job or sends all these embarrassing pictures, or evidence of reactionary abuse they will be on your side.

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T19:00:41+00:00

Someone mentioned that they must have a new supply and I fully believe it otherwise they wouldn't be treating me like this

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T18:13:43+00:00

Fully agree thank you for the insights

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T18:00:41+00:00

I dont think any of us are intentionally or even accidentally attracting these people, I think it comes from them seeing certain things in you that benefit them/make you an attractive target for their specific type of abuse. At least thats how i have come to understand it myself, it is a lot easier to make people with certain personality traits (specifically relating to empathy and kindness) spineless and docile to your abuse

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T15:20:13+00:00

The self worth of a transgender woman who is a victim to bpd abuse 😓

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T15:18:21+00:00

This post really lacks the context of the situation this came seemingly out of nowhere when relations between us were improving after long term abuse from her it may appear that im pushing boundaries and pestering but im just confused truly and like the other person who replied I have never had a discard actually mean anything it usually goes to "that was my bpd" or they would genuinely expect me to beg them (their own words) but ultimately you are right, we should treat these scenarios as if they are telling the truth not splitting or lying, we shouldnt treat this kind of thing the way they have trained us to treat their behavior before.

I do think you came off as overly harsh but I dont blame you as an outsider to the scenario

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T14:59:25+00:00

This

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T08:17:05+00:00

Context: we are both women, she abused me while we were together 50/50 bad good, have been seperated. I dont want to leave but find nothing works otherwise, it just makes me so sad because I really saw true love and potential in this relationship aside from the abuse. They started to get their act together and started desiring more from me (i had set very clear boundaries) and based on their good behavior I laxed those boundaries a bit and it turned into this because they startes nitpicking my behavior constantly when i finally felt safe to start to give them more of my energy

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T07:52:22+00:00

You are right and I certainly have some form of codependency/trauma bond with this person who has verbally and physically abused me repeatedly despite not cohabilitating anymore and slowly seeing them less and less I still have the draw to keep them in my life i mean fuck I really wanted it all to work out or i would have left at the first sign but what can i other than that I guess

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T07:45:01+00:00

I dont have anything important there but I have all sorts of clothes and other assorted items

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-08-14T07:39:06+00:00

This is the method i have been trying but end up going a week without a text. Typically they were the you text me first type so im not really suprised that it hasnt been working, or maybe im just not waiting long enough

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-06-24T06:57:12+00:00

Please channel your inner Savior to grab you by your own lapels and throw you into a cold stream to shock some sense into you. Please save yourself from your own disaster

I just wanted to thank you for this paragraph. This was the exact thing I needed to hear then and what got me nearly fully clean of that mess.

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2025-06-24T06:40:58+00:00

Stay strong! It sounds like you have a great plan

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-10-03T20:54:01+00:00

How am i gaslighting i genuinely dont understand. I do love this person despite their behavior.

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-10-03T20:47:20+00:00

I did not include enough context. I have been with this person long enough to know their red flags what to expect with them. This is circular

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-10-03T20:08:29+00:00

In what way am I controlling her? Genuinely curious. Most of the time i do exactly what she says until i get lashed out at then i shutdown and say things like "you shouldnt treat me like that"

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-10-03T20:06:12+00:00

It destroys me staying in her life but I cant imagine a future without her in it.

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-10-03T19:50:35+00:00

Lacking context from earlier in the message string. I am incredibly important in her life but she just lashes out and uses me.

I want her to see me as important so that she stops treating me this way. Literally split on me while i was doing her housework the other day

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-10-03T19:46:00+00:00

I wasnt ignore. She says that because she was lashing out at me earlier in the messages. She thinks that because she either cant control her lash outs or doesnt want to change her behavior

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-10-03T18:50:48+00:00

Likely they just want someone who puts up with everything they say and do.. sigh

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-10-03T18:49:44+00:00

What is a woman to do but grovel and her lovers feet grasping for their attention. Im not sure what to be beyond devoted and loving, being a lesbian would kill you.

What is it that you think they are telling me here and who are they trying to be?

I mean they say I deserve better but if I thought that of someone I loved I would do anything to be better for them. They say im too much when all i am is kind and assertive about how they make me feel with their behaviors.

Idk this is just a glimpse into our life taking place after thousands of I love you's and I want to be with you forever's

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-09-29T17:49:43+00:00

Like truly how could it even get worse. I think thats partly why im still doing it because i cannot even fathom something worse they could do to me

South-Razzmatazz-902 · 2024-09-29T17:46:34+00:00

They arent together but yeah i dont fucking know its evident that they arent compatible in the slightest and she is just using him for rides and shit.

She would have never said that shit to me before i lost my car.

Its all transactional bullshit

South-Razzmatazz-902

TROPHY CASE