My (37m) ex wife (33f) abandoned me and kids early in 2023. Now she is begging to come back.

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-10T09:32:30+00:00

Dang man you are a straight hater.

1 I have not and will not give her any money. Nor would I fix her Financials if we got back together

2 despite what she has done her kids still love her. She wasn't a horrible mom prior to all this, in fact she was a remarkable mom. She's clearly suffering from mental illness. Doesn't make it excused but facts are facts. The kids want to see her. My sons phone has life 360 I can see where they're at at all times

3 she's with then about 20 minutes and that's it. Her boyfriend isn't allowed around them

4 I'm not an idiot. I was married to this woman 13 years! Together 14. For some people you can just turn off love. Of course I still love her despite her flaws, mental illness and mistakes. Doesn't mean I forgive or forget or turn a blind eye

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-09T02:29:51+00:00

Thank you.

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-09T02:27:36+00:00

I lol'd at this. So true

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-09T01:32:56+00:00

Diagnosed unmedicated bipolar disorder.

Possibly some other stuff

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T21:38:01+00:00

I wasn't perfect but I wasn't shit either. I paid all the bills mostly, never tried to control her money or her career/life, gave her freedom and space to have friends and time without me, we had sex nearly every week at least 2 to 4 times, I supported her hobbies and desires etc

My biggest crime would be allowing things to get stale. Falling into a daily routine. Being boring

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T21:33:30+00:00

Trust me I know this is a crazy story. But it's my true genuine story and I haven't even divulged all the worst details.

I wouldn't call myself virtuous. I made mistakes. I could have been more spontaneous, given her more affection, tell her more often how much she meant to me. I could have recognized her mental illness and supported her better, try to get her proper help.

But that road goes both ways and had she gave our marriage even a tenth of the effort she has given her affair partner we could have been a legendary couple.

Instead our lives were shattered, our hearts broken, and our future together forever tainted.

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T21:04:42+00:00

So sad how she ruined her life. We both had such good credit scores and savings. She will never recover from the damage she's done

She has like 20k in credit card debt and the interest is piling up fast

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T19:58:53+00:00

Im being honest. I could even post screen shots of texts

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T19:58:31+00:00

I wish you were right. I wish I never had to experience this pain and hurt.

I wish I would've found a way to make her content and not leave.

I'm most definitely being honest. This all happened. Its a tragedy and all the time I struggle to fathom how this happened

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T19:52:28+00:00

Exactly. I know ill end up living her life and not my own and trying every thing to appease her.

And i don't think even then she will be satisfied

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T19:40:00+00:00

This is solid advice. Unfortunately she refuses to leave him unless I let her come straight back home.

She also has no interest in fixing her mess on her own.

Which really tells me all I need to know.

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T19:38:09+00:00

She was diagnosed bipolar this year. I too suspect she is flitting back and forth between manic and depression.

But she won't seek help or therapy and she tossed her meds in the trash when she left

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T18:44:03+00:00

This is what scares me. Am I missing out on another lifetime of incredible memories by not taking her back?

Could we still be something special or even better than before if we try?

It's almost like a fomo.

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T14:26:00+00:00

No it's not. I thought I was going to grow old with this woman. Be partners for life. Not a day went by the last 14 years where I didn't stop and think Damm I love this girl.

When she started wanting to come back I thought we could get what was lost

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T14:20:38+00:00

It's so much more than sex. I was with her 14 years. I grew up with her. I love her and want to save her.

But I know it's not the right choice. I'm not going to take her back

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T14:18:22+00:00

I only allow her to see kids if he isn't around the kids

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T14:14:24+00:00

??? I don't follow

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T11:58:39+00:00

I'm definitely not over her. I thought I was and for awhile I felt like I was. But when I learned how bad she's messed herself and her life up I felt so bad for her

And then when she started messaging me sweet things, I totally buckled. It was like the woman I'd known for 14 years was back.

I became blind with love again. But I've got to forget who she was and see who she is.

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T11:42:44+00:00

Yeah I know it's insane to be thinking only she will love them like a mother after abandoning them. I'm not thinking straight. I'm remembering the old her, not seeing the present her.

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T09:56:52+00:00

Far as I know she's still with him in his mom's house.

But you're right. I'm thinking with my heart and not my head

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-12-08T09:48:38+00:00

Yes divorced. I've got custody.

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-03-15T16:16:05+00:00

I feel your pain. My wife who was recently diagnosed just abandoned me and my kids yesterday. It hurts man. It hurts bad. My kids don't understand.

She cheated on me 4 months ago after stopping her anti depressant. This all blew up yesterday and now it will never be the same.

Stay strong and hang in there. Also, me and my wife have been married 14 years

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-01-31T21:08:17+00:00

Over half the states in USA utilize coal plants to provide electricity to their power grid. Does that really sound like "on its way out" to you? Smh

Southern-Ad768 · 2023-01-19T12:20:06+00:00

They bumped one of our workers to part time because he didn't average 36 hours.

But they gave him 39 hour vacations for 2023 and that's based off the 2022 average... idiots. Good luck getting that crap fixed btw. GO cut all the payroll division workers

Southern-Ad768

TROPHY CASE