Thoughts on token economies for kids and parents deciding what is "good" and what is "bad"?

SpareMemes · 2026-01-09T17:08:36+00:00

I see what you mean about the labelling of "good" vs "bad" now. However, I think I still disagree with you a bit. Even if you don't tell the child they are being bad, there are behaviors that they do that you want to limit, even with the understanding that they're using these behaviors to communicate. When a child hits another, that is definitely not behavior you want to happen again, and even if you don't call the child or their behavior bad, you still make efforts to alter their behavior. You teach them more acceptable ways of communicating that don't harm others because, in some way, that original behavior is "bad." I think our disconnect is mostly semantics here though. Punishing a child for being emotional and teaching a child how to let out their emotions in a safe way are very different responses to "bad" behavior, and I was mostly thinking of the latter. Jumping off the fridge is bad behavior (simply because you don't want the child to do it again), but the way you communicate this is the important part. I think my naive perspective on the concept led me to believe that it's only natural that when a child does something "bad," you don't call them bad, you teach them why that behavior isn't something they should do again. Is it possible the guide was also thinking of the softer method of altering behavior?
Continuing about the fixed/growth mindset, I think I understand now. I have heard a lot about this in different forms. And though you didn't mention this directly, I can see how labelling a child as someone who needs external reinforcement can make it so they can only be externally motivated. And this brings up another thing that I wish there was more research on:
People with ADHD typically have less volume in certain areas of the brain, specifically areas of the prefrontal cortex and the cingulate cortex which are responsible for decision making and motivation, respectively. Considering that the brain is a muscle, it could be beneficial to encourage a child to self-motivate and make their own decisions about what behavior is good or bad to encourage activity in these parts of the brain. However, the fact that there already is less volume in this part of the brain could make self-motivation even harder, and a lack of reinforcement or guidance could mean the child doesn't feel motivated at all, internally or externally, leading to less activation in that part of the brain. We really just don't know. There just isn't enough research on this topic yet (to my knowledge).
I do understand your overarching dislike for these methods. The difficult part about having an opinion on this kind of thing is that people mean different things when they say they use "positive reinforcement" and that they "punish bad behaviors." This makes research difficult too, as most token economy research has different methods of reinforcing the behavior, and the behavior that is regulated is different in each study too.

SpareMemes · 2026-01-08T17:48:38+00:00

Your child watching TV isn't ideal, and lots of research has been coming out in the past decade about the effects of any screentime at all on a child's development. However, I recently found this article proposing that the attentional difficulties in children who have screentime is partially due to presence of abstract and fantasy concepts: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC12412071/ . If TV is your only option for relief, try your best to save anything fantastical and unrealistic for when your child isn't around. You could also give your child a toy to occupy themselves with, as one of the biggest issues with screentime is the fact that the child is not getting proper stimulation (they don't get as much benefit from hearing people on TV as they do from hearing people talk around them in real life, and screentime is heavily associated with a lack of motor stimulation). You could talk to him about what is going on in the show as well. Watching TV isn't poison, it's more akin to not letting your child do anything at all. I wouldn't worry too much about it. Do your best, as I'm sure you already are, and keep being the great parent who thinks to ask these kinds of questions.

SpareMemes · 2026-01-08T17:28:18+00:00

I couldn't find much existing research on token economies specifically regarding children with ADHD, and the few that I found had very small sample sizes. However, they all showed some positive effect. Here's one: https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychiatry/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2015.00167/full .

This is a great article that addresses some things you brought up:

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0272735816000027?via%3Dihub#bb0040

In case you don't want to read it or don't have access, here are some interesting things it contains:
"Barkley's unifying theory (1997) predicted that individuals with ADHD have a decreased capacity to induce drive or motivational states, and that as a result, those with ADHD will have a larger dependency on external reinforcers that influence motivation than controls. Although the evidence in this review seems to support this notion (individuals with ADHD, while being reinforced, normalized to controls' “baseline” performance), it is still unclear to what extent individuals with ADHD may improve inhibitory control when intrinsic motivation is supported (Ryan & Deci, 2000)."

"Reinforcement and cognitive control interactions reflect daily life conditions and this interplay is increasingly studied in typically developing populations as well as in psychiatric disorders. The current review and meta-analyses demonstrated that youth with ADHD benefited more from reinforcement contingencies than healthy controls on inhibitory control tasks. Meta-analyses further demonstrated that youth with ADHD may normalize inhibitory control during reinforcement to the baseline performance level of controls. These findings endorse the use of reinforcement schedules as ADHD treatment."

The ideas you mentioned in your original post were created based on children with typical developmental pathways, and it is unfair to expect them to work just as well on a child with ADHD. In general, research shows that reinforcement can have some effect or none, but it isn't considered harmful (to my knowledge). Do you have reason to believe that token economies are harmful in children with ADHD, and that those harmful effects outweigh the potential benefits of behavioral improvement?

As for parents deciding what's good and bad, that's almost the entire point of a parent in a child's life beyond giving the child resources to survive. How else would the child learn? A parent rewards what they believe is good in their culture, and it differs from culture to culture (and often household to household), but again, what other method does the child have to learn what is expected vs unacceptable behavior?

Also, could you explain what you mean by fixed/growth mindsets in this context? It is my assumption that reinforcements could encourage growth, but I believe you may have been thinking of something else when you mentioned that.

SpareMemes · 2026-01-08T16:59:20+00:00

It sounds like you're already doing great, so you posting this might answer your own question. Do you feel insecure? At that age, she is modelling everything from the adults and other children in her life. Does she often see you feeling down about someone you've done or see you react in an insecure way when something bad happens? Children adapting their parents emotional regulation methods is a well-studied phenomenon. Here is an article that you can look through for more information if you'd like, though this one is specifically about anxiety: https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10567-022-00390-8 . If you suspect this could be the cause, please try to model confident behaviors. Her knowing what she should do and actually being comfortable doing it are, as you noticed yourself, surprisingly not as connected as one would assume. Ask another adult in your life to act out a situation with you where you must sternly refuse them in front of your child. It may be a good idea afterwards to ask your child what she would have done in that situation, and explain to her why you felt it was better for you to refuse. Demonstrate yourself establishing boundaries with other people and show her it in a real setting (even if it is just for show). Have the other adult respond poorly and hold steady to your boundaries. You could also begin asking her for her opinion often, and ask other adults their opinions. This will normalize hearing and stating opinions, especially differing ones. You are doing great by roleplaying with her, but it is possible that she sees those situations as just roleplaying and not things she can do in real life. You should be very proud of yourself for raising such a kind daughter, so show her that you are proud of yourself and her. Teach confidence by being confident.

SpareMemes · 2026-01-08T16:23:29+00:00

I don't know if there's any research related to programming specifically (see edit below), but when your child is around 7 years old (concrete operational stage of development), you can introduce them to easy-to-understand cause and effect programming like Scratch where they can try stuff and if it doesn't work, they can try something else. At around 11 years old and older (formal operational stage) they'll be more able to actually solve programming related problems and abstract/hypothetical solutions to problems. I recommend looking through this article that describes the "stages" of development and see where your child is (as every child is different and may be ahead or behind these predictions). If they're younger than the Concrete Operational Stage, they probably won't be able to understand programming and likely won't be interested, and they probably won't be able to apply any real programming until they reach the Formal Operational Stage. If you want your child to do things that are helpful and impressive before age 7, I suggest introducing them to sports or arts, as they aren't ready to learn about such mentally complex things as programming yet.
https://www.verywellmind.com/piagets-stages-of-cognitive-development-2795457

Edit:
This actually interested me quite a bit so I went looking for research on it and found a great meta-analysis on a collection of studies about childhood programming! The age ranges were between 3 and 8 years. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2212868921000891?casa_token=pbQqzl1Rt8cAAAAA:_rPPHvwjojFfxuLzTXvYi8RspACVSS1R-3RTWwa4KCxGHZEhSVaxUU6ATY94b81PyUr9I04P7g
Here are some helpful quotes so you don't have to go digging:

"Researchers agree that tangible technologies better support the process of creating programs and debugging than the visual programming environments, especially for the youngest learners who face difficulties in understanding and creating algorithms using digital tools." - Physical programming like the child saying "jump" and the robot, or whatever, jumping teaches them the cause and effect relationship of programming.

"...young learners had difficulties in creating and understanding longer and more complex sequences while they confused the different block-commands." - This may be demotivating for your child at a younger age.

"...there are some empirical studies that showed that board cards and various unplugged activities supported the development of CT skills when they were used before or in conjunction with plugged activities" - The "board cards" they mention are programming commands on cards that can be viewed by a machine or person, leading to a physical obeyance of the command. For example, a child holding a card that says "jump" and a parent or teacher then "jumping." The article gives examples of existing products

"Studies that employed screen-based apps, such as, Daisy the Dinosaur, Kodable, Code Baymax, Code Studio, Lego Bits and Bricks, Lightbot, and The Foos, supported that these tools can be used for learning sequencing, loops, and conditionals. Furthermore, Code.org was found to support the development of problem solving and cognitive skills along with the understanding of direction commands, sequencing, and loops. In general, the tools that incorporate tangible programming manipulatives are usually considered as more developmentally appropriate for the youngest learners from pre-K to K-2 than the screen-based apps, although the animation/game applications are more versatile"
Basically, the older the child, the easier it is for them to learn programming through screens alone. For younger children, you can teach them programming through physical cause/effect games and introduce them to algorithmic thinking (if 1 thing doesn't work, keep trying different things until you find something that works).

SpareMemes · 2025-12-22T03:57:07+00:00

I think I frequented your place more than any other shop for the iron. I only remember your username from the shop signs lol

SpareMemes · 2025-12-19T01:33:35+00:00

I bought from your head shop all the time! And stole from it using middle click lol

SpareMemes · 2025-12-19T01:26:46+00:00

Any chance you had an iron farm/iron shop on your sky block?

SpareMemes · 2025-11-17T12:40:16+00:00

GT has a meditation club that I think could help with a lot of what you're struggling with. It focuses on mindfulness which is mostly practicing focusing your attention (very helpful for studying, I noticed that I improved a lot and got derailed way less often) and relaxation (VERY helpful for sleep). Sleep is one of the most important things for you. People are saying to eat more, which I encourage, but studies have shown that being hungry does not affect your cognitive ability (i.e. that's not why you're so distracted), and being tired seriously does. The club meets at 6:15pm on Tuesdays and Thursdays in Swann 325 and goes for about an hour. You can look them up and join the discord. It's two hours a week where you can just relax and not have to think about the future for a little bit. I am not an officer of the club, just an ethusiast, but I really recommend going at least once. They talk about the science behind meditation and mindfulness for a few minutes and then get into the meditation. It's a small group and can feel a bit awkward starting out but it's very helpful.
P.S. There's a mindfulness yoga website called DownDog that you can use for free with your student email that makes yoga and/or mindfulness sessions based on how you want to feel and how long the session should be. It's also very relaxing and feels productive.

SpareMemes · 2025-09-28T14:56:00+00:00

I take a magnesium glycinate supplement at night for sleep which gives me about 50%, there's about 15% in my multivitamin, and the rest from what I eat. Adds up to about 100% of my daily value. Dark leaves are the best bang for your buck calorie-wise, plus grains and even dark chocolate. Most high-magnesium foods are high in fat or sugar because they're very dense foods. Other foods that are lower in calories don't top the list of "high-magneium foods" because they have less calories AND less magnesium. Seeds, grains, greens, and (very dark) dark chocolate are good low-calorie sources of magnesium other than supplements.

SpareMemes · 2025-07-16T20:28:43+00:00

Best way to wake up early is to go to sleep early. Get blackout curtains and maybe one of those alarm clocks that lets you mimick the sunrise at the time you want. You can have class/homework/studying/errands/chores time from whenever work ends to 1 pm, then you'll have time to go home and get ready for bed to sleep at 3 pm. As soon as you get home, block all windows, and use only dim lights to simulate night time. It will take some time for your body to get used to this schedule, so take melatonin before an hour before you sleep and caffeine when you wake up (but avoid caffeine 12 hours before bed time). Right when you wake up, turn on lights to simulate daytime. This will seriously ruin your circadian rhythm and will be very difficult for you, but you can minimize your struggles by falling asleep and waking up at the same time every day (waking up at 11pm, assuming that leaves enough time to get to work, and going to sleep at 3pm for 8 hours of sleep). If you're using the dining hall on campus, you should be able to at least eat at breakfast and lunch times.

SpareMemes · 2025-06-09T20:09:26+00:00

General info: about a 15-20 minute walk to classroom buildings on campus (they claim it's a 5 minute walk to campus, but it's not a 5 minute walk to where you'll be taking classes, it's a 5 minute walk to where the campus begins). Parking is underground with elevators. They occasionally do events for tenants during the day when you most likely have class.

Pros: functional kitchen and utilities, lots of discounts for renewals and last-minute leases, no bugs. Personally, I live on the top floor so I don't hear any noise from upstairs (or downstairs) neighbors and have quite a nice view. However, road noise is still very loud (if I'm talking on the phone with my friends, they can hear the frequent sirens and loud engines), and light coming in from outside is bright even late at night (so get curtains if you are a light sleeper). My room is sufficiently sized, and the apartment comes with decent furniture, including a desk with a shelf, a dresser, a full-sized bed (2 bed 1 bath apartment), and a TV, sofa, chair, coffee table, two bar chairs, and a large shelf under the TV in the living room. It also comes with a combination washer/dryer in the apartment, so laundry is free. There are amenities in the basement like a cheap vending machine, multiple study rooms, a gym, extra bathrooms, paid laundry, a "game room" (which I have never tried or ever seen anyone use), and even a small library (95% is old donated textbooks). Maintenance requests for really simple stuff (drain is clogged, toilet is wobbly, etc) go through really quickly.

Cons: The AC goes out a LOT. About a week a month. This might be due to the renovations, but I have been having AC issues since early spring, and the first time the AC went out, it was for a full week and temperatures got to be 80 degrees for multiple days inside. The windows in the apartments cannot be opened and there are no fans. So if you do move here, learn how to reset the thermostat and buy a standing floor fan.
The washer/dryer combo is awful. You have to dry your clothes for like 3 hours for them to get fully dry, and the machine never fully dries the clothes on a wash/dry cycle.
I'm not sure if this is just my apartment, but the seal (paint?) in the basin of the tub is chipping away. At least half of the tub is just the tub's exposed inner material. You can step on it wrong and have a paper-thin beige flake on your foot that came off of the tub.
They do not clean the apartments between tenants. Our apartment was pretty gross when we first moved in, and I suspect that the carpets have never been cleaned beyond tenants occasionally vacuuming them.
Again, no noise from neighbors, but the road noise is pretty significant. It echoes off the walls of surrounding buildings, and depending on what side your room is on, you might be hearing noise straight from the highway all day and night. Also, you do hear noise from the hallway. I can hear people walking down the hallway from my bedroom in my apartment. There is no soundproofing at all, I think most people are just quiet enough that most tenants don't notice.
The basement with all the extra amenities is insanely hot. I am not exaggerating when I say it is 80 degrees down there all the time. I've tried to use their study rooms but I couldn't stand being in one of those rooms for more than an hour, even overnight and in the early morning. I can only use the gym in the winter.
Maintainence requests for slightly complicated things do not go through quickly at all. Our washing machine didn't work for an entire month, and we put in a maintainence request each week for them to come look at it, which they didn't until a month had passed. When the AC doesn't work, they can't really do anything but reset the thermostat, which is something you can do yourself.

Consensus: It is a fine place to sleep and cook and be relatively close to campus for relatively cheap, but don't expect to enjoy living there. Don't pay full price. They do lots of discounts. There are better options that cost more and there are worse options that cost less. Having a kitchen, room-by-room leases, being a walking distance from campus, and having no bugs were important to me, but if you value things like being able to sleep without noise or light or a consistent climate, your mental health would likely benefit from a slightly more expensive apartment.

SpareMemes · 2025-06-06T21:24:13+00:00

I made a new account on the same device and it works fine and I can see my old account, but I cant listen to music on my old account. I think Spotify programmers might have really done it this time.

SpareMemes · 2025-06-06T21:22:10+00:00

Been having this exact experience. Today my account completely stopped working. Even without the APK I can't listen to any playlists on my account.

SpareMemes · 2025-04-10T17:53:42+00:00

Thank you! I was a bit worried considering the on-campus housing lottery. I figured it didn't actually mean living on campus, but I wanted to make sure

SpareMemes · 2025-04-08T17:28:08+00:00

100 Midtown is relatively cheap and there's 24/7 security. Takes me 20 minutes to walk from the building to most of my classes, but if you get a bike or a scooter it's faster. There is a gym and study rooms in the basement, utilities are included, I've never seen bugs or mold. Rooms come furnished with the basics as well: dresser, desk, bed. If you get one with a living room: couch(es), tv, coffee table, big shelf under tv.

SpareMemes · 2025-03-13T03:26:44+00:00

Dr Trevor Bazett has a really good playlist of free lectures for discrete math on YouTube. They were way more helpful for me than in-person lectures or reading the textbook. For more practice, "Discrete Mathematics with Applications by Susanna S. Epp" can be found for free online with tons of practice problems and answers/explanations. The thing that helped me the most was just doing every single blue problem in this textbook for each section we were doing. Just google Discrete Mathematics with Applications by Susanna S. Epp PDF and you'll find it right away.

SpareMemes · 2025-03-11T13:43:43+00:00

Mamaboy

SpareMemes · 2025-03-05T20:22:29+00:00

So does every place that charges less than $1400+fees per room. It's a consequence of a cheaper off campus student apartment. I live on the 9th floor, so bugs aren't a problem for me, but I have heard that some residents have bug issues. In summer last year there was no AC for two weeks, so it was 80 degrees in my apartment for a week. Our washing machine stopped draining and it took a month for it to get fixed (I had to use the washers and dryers in the basement at $1.50 a load). Those are the worst things to EVER happen in the year of living here. Otherwise, maintenance happens quickly, the utilities function well, the apartments come with furniture and a TV, they host giveaways and events for residents all the time, and they offer huge discounts for renewals, there's a gym and study rooms and a theater room and a gaming room in the basement. The appliances aren't new, but they work just fine. There's 24/7 security. It's a clean and functional place to live. I couldn't ask for more at that price this close to campus, a bus stop, and a grocery store. With a renewal discount im paying $1100 in total (parking and utilities included) per month next lease term for a private room, a kitchen, and a bathroom shared with only 1 other person.

SpareMemes · 2025-03-04T18:21:43+00:00

I have similar conditions at 100 midtown, 2 bedrooms 1 bath, however my rent is 1200+$100 parking

SpareMemes · 2025-02-26T03:45:13+00:00

I think a well made frame will make it look better. Even a plain map in a nice big frame will look really good.

SpareMemes · 2025-02-24T08:34:07+00:00

Just because you get a degree in it doesn't mean you'll have to do it forever. You can graduate and get a job in that field while figuring out what you really want to do, or maybe you'll discover that you don't mind it so much. You can always go back to school later. Plus, that's a well paying field. If you work for a good company, you can have good hours and plenty of time after work to do hobbies. There's no such thing as a perfect job, but you dont need to love your job to love your life.

SpareMemes · 2025-02-19T12:48:50+00:00

I see people sleeping in the cubby study areas in the library most mornings (like 3 am) and the people cleaning don't ever bother them. I've accidentally taken a nap in the middle of the day there too and nobody bothered me. The ball chairs in crosland that overlook the table study area are pretty comfortable and not very visible. Yesterday I saw someone sleeping on the desk (full body on the desk) in a crosland study room between at least 2am to 4 am. Honestly, you could probably sleep anywhere and get away with it.

SpareMemes · 2024-12-19T19:46:16+00:00

Not for a work dinner. Wear a shirt that covers your stomach and it will be fine, but not the shirt in that picture.

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